Monday, January 9th 2012
When The Look From A Dude In A Red Polo Shirt Says It All
Willow "Coloring Outside of the Lines" Smith, Jaden Smith and their gang of Latch Key Kids left the Louis Vuitton store in L.A. the other night and I have two very good reasons for being mad at her. The first being that the gay poodle's ass on her head has given me a craving for cinnamon candy popcorn and that's not okay since my shit is on a diet after swallowing all the good things Italy has to offer for a week. The second being that I wish that when I was 3 (or however old she is) I could walk around looking like the acid-tipped Bride of Minajestein without the fear of an abuelita slapping the WTF off of my head with a chancleta.
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Dumb little whore looks like a boy in drag. Wish I could slap her clear across the face.
Submitted by swarm-of-locusts on Mon, 01/09/2012 - 4:15pm.
Worse. I wouldn't be surprised if Willow turned into a Parasite Hilton when she's older, when her music "career" has died and she's famous for being the spawn of celebrities.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
My question is what the hell are freaking 10-year-olds going to buy at a damn Louis Vuitton store??
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"The older you get, the wiser you get...unless you're a banana!" - Rose Nylund
Most obnoxious kids ever. Someone should headslap the smugness out of them.
It's sad to see a kid that young trying that hard to be seen. Her parents have made a mess of her and her future doesn't look bright once the thrill is gone with the paparazzi. We all know what happened to Britney once she started sportin the pink wig.
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Taking crazy things seriously is a serious waste of time."
— Haruki Murakami
Someone needs to tell the kid Halloween is in like 10 months.
I missed the meeting, fellow dlisters. Are we not using the new-wave "reply" buttons?
Anyway uvy, you made me crack up with this:
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Mon, 01/09/2012 - 1:37pm.
"How can you look so fucking smug when you're a) a child and b) look like Tom Hulce as Amadeus after he tripped and fell in a goddamned cotton candy machine?"
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"When I come up, I rush, I rush for you..."
This is some kind of shopping therapy to ease the pain of divorce and it isn't working.
Poor kid looks like she's on the ho stroll.
It's so sad that this kid's lame parents are forcing her to become Baby Lady Gaga at age 11. Did you know she doesn't even go to school? Not homeschooled either, her parents have put her development on hold so that they can play Celebrity Tween Barbie with her and pay off everybody to release her shitty 'music'. Hooray for overprivileged rich kids and the nepotism that will always see to that they can be smug little shits without ever having to lift a finger.
Will and Jada just dont give a fuck I see
www.theinfamouslife.com
www.twitter.com/so_infamous
I don't believe in corporal punishment for kids.
But for those spoiled smug little shits, I would gladly make an exception.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Well I can choose to be mad that a 10 year old or whatever is allowed to spend more than what I make in a year on a Louis Vuitton bag and shit or I can get depressed. I'll do both.
I wanna slap those smug little nobodies so hard they wake up in the next county.
What a smug looking ugly-ass little madam.
"No matter how cynical you become, it's impossible to keep up." - Lily Tomlin
I don't give a fuck if they're kids, they need their asses beat with a platform clog.
~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♥~♦¤♦~♥~
FANTA FANTA, NO COKE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lnRDU4LdZE
Meat Loaf was in the middle of a show when his knees suddenly hit the stage floor like a narcoleptic bat out of hell ~MK
"...swallowing all the good things Italy has to offer for a week"
Oooh, I'll bet you did too, hon! Pics, please!
(I hate to say it but Willow is not an attractive girl. And her smug entitlement makes her downright ugly. PARENTING FAIL.)
Ugh I find it really gross that I can see the gum in Jaden's mouth in that main pic. I mean, I'm assuming it's gum, though knowing that family it could be a diamond tooth or something.
I know it's a dumb pet peeve, but it looks so trashy. You know, push the gum between your gums and lip or smile with your mouth closed, but don't just show it to the world. It's one reason why I want to vomit whenever I see pics of Britney smiling because there's always a big wad of gum in that piehole of hers.
Oops...wrong thread. Damn it!!!!
My daughter was in the NICU with aspiration pneumonia for a week after her birth I can absolutely guarantee, NO ONE would have kept me from going in to see my baby girl! They would have had to have me arrested if it came to that!!
Fuck all that bullshit! Especially after I had waddled my hurting, episiotomied (I'm sure that isn't a word, but what the hell) ass all the way over there! Oh helllllz no!!!!!!!!!1
The only time parents were told they couldn't come in was when they were expecting an admit, or already admitting a new little one. =( so many teeny tiny little ones in there! Then you come to my babies bed and there's this full-term, almost 9 pounder. Taking up almost the whole little bed. Lol. Saw a lot of head turns when other parents would walk around, looking at all of the other babies!
She pulled her first attitude while there as well. I guess the young man beside her snored horribly. She threw a fit, they moved him, and she slept peacefully for the rest of the night! Lol. Thatsa' .my girl!!! =p
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Mountain Dew is also the perfect butt douche to turn to when that stubborn gerbil refuses to fall out of your ass.-Michael K.
Submitted by The Machine on Mon, 01/09/2012 - 1:47pm.
OMG I was going to post nearly the identical post! Only it happened to me in a clothing store. They only had one register open. It was ridiculous.
Submitted by FreakGeek on Mon, 01/09/2012 - 1:37pm.
When fat, sloppy Midwestern women start using your fugly purses & shit as status symbols, you know that brand has bottomed out about 5 years ago.
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THIS^
About 2 years ago I was in line at the grocery store and watched a (in her 40s?) woman with one of those friggin $2k LV purses hold up the line for a solid ten minutes because the coupon she insisted be scanned for ten cents off a container of yogurt was several weeks expired.
Even if it were a knock-off, it still makes you look like a tool to try to pass off carrying around a several thousand dollar money holder and bitching about saving an extra ten cents on a dairy product.
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Raising the bar for lowering standards since 1982.
Cheers, letinstar!
ITA about Louis Vuitton bags. My Hong Kong Cantonese teacher calls them "the uniform". Knock-offs abound, and if so many people have them, (real or not) they're not special.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
@Hekki - LMAO @ "Snotleigh"!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Jesus.
Fucking.
Christ.
The ability to be proud of allowing your child dress to self-express goes out the goddamn window when you let her parade around in a wig that looks like the vagina of the resident skank of the retirement home.
I would smack myself for allowing my child to embarrass herself with this crap.
It's not "edgy", Will and Jada, she looks like she should be committed.
Fuck.
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Raising the bar for lowering standards since 1982.
@deb: you just made my day! :)
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Oh how I despise Willow Smith, let me count thy ways...
Urg, remember when Elton John started out and wore rediculous clothing to steer us from his balding and not-so-pretty face? It worked because in the end he got some touch ups and a forever wig (forgot the name).
Now Willow... Willow is certainly not blessed with her mothers looks, she looks like her dad, she's spoiled and genuinely thinks, either we won't notice cos she's rich or cos she's meant to be talented. But honey, "Edge" is not for you. Just get a fringe or something to relieve us a quater of your face if we must see it.
How can you look so fucking smug when you're a) a child and b) look like Tom Hulce as Amadeus after he tripped and fell in a goddamned cotton candy machine?
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
Couldn't they have picked a better store? People in my little bitty shit town carry LV. When fat, sloppy Midwestern women start using your fugly purses & shit as status symbols, you know that brand has bottomed out about 5 years ago.
double post
@Letinstar - enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZOcDZaCeMAA&feature=results_video&playnex...
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
This is what it looks like when home schooled kids have a field trip.
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www.dungeonhordes.com
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Submitted by Deb on Mon, 01/09/2012 - 1:13pm.
letinstar, you rule! What was the name of the girl that hung all over Peter? That was a great episode!
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ah yes! that trick hanging over peter was margie (can't remember the last name)
editted to add: i think it was margie ripple/whipple...something like that...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
I can just see the meeting that happened before this outing to Louis Vuitton...
"Okay kids, I'm not sure if your agents explained what today is all about, but I'm going to review a few bullet points. You are young, hip and fabulous. But you CANNOT upstage Willow and Jaden, okay? Don't speak until spoken to, and do NOT look them directly in the eyes. Your costumes are hanging over there. Remember, the vibe is hip and cool, okay?... Yes, Snotleigh, you are being paid scale for this."
Yes, this child needs an abuelita BADLY. If one cannot be found, I will gladly substitute. However, I need a heavier chancleta.
There's a small chance this kid might actually settle down and be normal, just to spite her parents. You know how kids of radical people do that sometimes... They go to law school and become chino-wearing Republicans. I would laugh SO HARD.
I would have been bored to tears in a fancy pocketbook store at 11 years old. I think it's because I was allowed to actually be a child.
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
They look like those kids from the John Carpenter movie Village of the Dammed!
Jaden really looks like Jada there.
Hmmmm spoilt, moronic looking, manufactured, classless little cunts...they should atract many followers and get very rich! What ever happened to talent?
Willow Minaj.
Well, at least we now know what a Tranny Will would look like.
letinstar, you rule! What was the name of the girl that hung all over Peter? That was a great episode!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Willow always has that vaguely smug smirk on her big-eared face. Wait until she's older and has to come up with an excuse for this fuckery to her friends.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Pretentious, spoiled, rotten, bratty, snotty, stuck up, little ugly kid.
They were hanging out in Louis Vuitton? How edgy...and boring as fuck.
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Too weird to live; too rare to die.
Submitted by Datura on Mon, 01/09/2012 - 12:54pm.
Me too.
They need to have a one on one with Diabla from Beyond Scared Straight and try and straighten out their smug asses.
Submitted by Deb on Mon, 01/09/2012 - 12:32pm.
The whole ridiculous pink wig reminds me of this:
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_HhD7YKC7-gg/TLJvB6JB7AI/AAAAAAAAAbc/SXYqp2tmTw...
Anybody remember that episode? Fucking Jan...
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lucy winter's party! one of my all time favorite episodes of the "brady bunch"...i know i should be ashamed for knowing this...but i ain't...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 01/09/2012 - 12:20pm.
I cannot STAND this smug child. I want to kick her in the face.
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Yes and YAAASSSS!! 1000 Flowers will be delivered to your home immediately!!
There is a special line at the entrance to Hell for people who laugh at children crying, so I will see you there. 12/9/11- MK
every time i see a smith kid do their public shenanigans, i want to slap the shit out of will and jada...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
For some reason my husband and I watched the Jaden Smith version of the Karate Kid last night. Cute kid, but what bullshit. Why exactly did the movie need to be remade?
And...was anyone else uncomfortable with Jackie Chan telling 11 year old Jaden Smith "Jacket off"?
SucknFuck, LOL! Two words for the kid: FREAH HKKKKK!
"The only money shot you'll get is a load of tears to the face." MK