Sienna Miller's Homewrecking Legacy Will Be Passed On (Hopefully)
High Priestess Whitney was right when she preached that the children are our future and now it looks like our future is going to be every shade of ESCANDALOSO, because my homewrecking queen Sienna Miller has got a uterus full of fetus. UsWeekly says that the retired MPV-winning man thief and her boyfriend of a year Tom Sturridge (the fancy Skid Row resident she's puckering on in the picture above) will be parents to a hipster baby in a few months. If Peaches Geldof getting knocked up wasn't reason enough to start digging your 2012 underground bunker, then this news will be enough. SHOVELS OUT!
Sienna's rep hasn't confirmed any of this, but one of her loud mouth friends told UsWeekly, "They just spent the holidays in Paris together after they announced the news in London. [Their] were not surprised by the news of the pregnancy. They're really good together."
That baby is going to be such a damn hipster. It's going to come out of Sienna Miller's former bulldozer vagina in a vintage Liz Claiborne cape (True Story: I was in a Salvation Army in Greenpoint and heard some dirty hipster ask if they had any Liz Claiborne brand capes), an American Spirit in its mouth, the scent of patchouli wafting off of it and a monocle over its eye (because it will be a monocle-wearing baby before monocle-wearing babies are the thing). I just hope Sienna teaches her hipster baby everything she knows about relationships. Like age is nothing but a number and a wedding ring is nothing but something that will give your genitals an extra tingle while your married piece fingers you. A wedding ring is sort of like a cock ring for your finger!
But if it's true that kids turn out the opposite of their parents, then Sienna's child will probably care about the importance of bathing as much as it cares about respecting the marital vows of others. BOOOOOO!
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I am slowly coming to the realization that I should procreate just to balance out humanity against the likes of Peaches and Sienna's spawn.
Surely, my sperm can do better?!
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I don't think she should breed, but what can anyone do?
Isn't she the guess for the blind who had an abortion because she got pregnant by Puff Daddy?
So, i think this is the female version of The Omen: Damien.
.
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eta - Oh Shit! Elizabeth Hurley did that one already! ahahaa
.
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I saw some old pics of this hobag with a very married Cillian Murphy. Please tell me she isn't really breeding. I guess it's good that she at least bagged a single dude. I'm all for getting your kicks and I blame spouses for stepping out on their partners but when you've been the mistress not once, but multiple times, I gotta start throwing shade.
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"When I come up, I rush, I rush for you..."
So how does this work... RPattz is the stepfather? I'm lost. It's all too English for me.
Leah Teen Mom, Peaches, now this...guessing a baby announcement from XTina, Brit, JLo, AngieJo, SamRo or Lilo will hit by January's end.
Yup, I thought that was Asston as well.
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..."suspicious looking local".
I thought he was so cute in Pirate Radio and I was disappointed when I found out he was dating Sluttyienna. It'll be a race between Peaches' and Sienna's babies to see who can out-hipster the other.
Well aren't you just carrying around a big bag of nothing!
In the spirit of my beloved M.K., Tom looks like basic cable's answer to Ashton Kutcher.
Be intrigued, be interested. DON'T be stupid.---TheBreakdown
i pity the nanny thats gonna raise this sperm squirt.
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
Weezy - Ah yes, the glory days!! *nostalgic for pink wigs*
OT You know that baby's gonna be playing "I'll show you mine if you'll show me yours" with the doctor delivering him/her. The slut gene is strong with this one.
ETA Heckler, very good point! *sigh*
Submitted by Sweetas on Fri, 01/06/2012 - 11:23am.
MJT - right?? I was just wishing some celeb somewhere would do SOMETHING besides hook up, break up and get knocked up. Come on, step it up guys!
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Probably aren't hearing more interesting things because the News of the World isn't around anymore. hahaha. It's back to the world pretending that 'celebs' are morally outstanding, intelligent, responsible human beings, unlike us unwashed masses.
This ain't news. It's not like it's her first pregnancy, just the first one she decided to keep.
I totally thought that was Hobo Jesus, too. That would've been a slightly more interesting story, it seems like it could happen.
Submitted by Sweetas on Fri, 01/06/2012 - 11:23am.
ITA. Oh for the days of coked up Lohan crashing SUV's, Paris flashing the pie goods, and a bald-headed Britany attacking the paps with an umbrella....
"...a monocle over its eye (because it will be a monocle-wearing baby before monocle-wearing babies are the thing)."
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Love it, MK!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
I think she's pretty. She's not particularly interesting or exotic-looking, but her features form together very nicely.
That being said: WHAT'S WITH ALL THE BABIES LATELY???
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Douchechill!
MJT - right?? I was just wishing some celeb somewhere would do SOMETHING besides hook up, break up and get knocked up. Come on, step it up guys!
Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Fri, 01/06/2012 - 11:18am.
UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is everyone pregnant!?!?!?!?
thats how i feel :/
UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is everyone pregnant!?!?!?!?
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You really have to side clap and pucker for a piece who can stand next to a white feather and out-gay it. - MK 8/3/2011
I thought that was Ashton Kutcher the old lady heart butcher for a hot minute.
As a straight lady I think she's one of the prettiest ladies around. There's something about her face and her legs. I wish I looked like her.
When she was with Jude Law it was too much pretty.
Tom Sturridge looks like a 100% str8 fish-fucking, tuna-tasting exclusively hetro real man!
I may be total shit for saying this, but I really liked her with that Getty dude. It was the only way to hear about him in the "news". He was like eleven in Lord of the Flies, so I can't really get off on that. *puts toys away*
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Don't make me quote Nabokov at you. I'll do it. I promise.
take that peaches geldorf!
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
But what about Juuuuuude?
Ita with everyone who said she's a gorgeous slut.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Keanu is looking rough these days.
She is gorgeous and slutty. Swoooooon.
Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Fri, 01/06/2012 - 10:47am.
At least they aren't over the moon. ______________________________________________
hahahahha- right?
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It’s so funny how we don’t talk anymore
It’s so funny why we don’t talk anymore
But it ain’t losing sleep
And I ain’t counting sheep.
It’s so funny how we don’t talk anymore.
Ugh. I can hardly wait until his BFF and fellow fauxbo RPattz has a kid with KStew. I can see the handmade trashcan shaped cribs on sale at Petit Tresor now.
At least they aren't over the moon. ______________________________________________
McGill Class of '97
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
"I'm sorry, we're all out of our Liz Claiborne capes but we have some fabulous Montenegro blazers if you're interested!"
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
She is pretty, but something about her says, "I SMELL LIKE AN ANTIQUE STORE!"
"[Their] were not surprised by the news of the pregnancy"
I'm no grammar expert but huh?
And Sienna is fucking hot...
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"Dog, Jack drinks exclusively at the Braille Bar." EastEndGirl, 11/01/2011
I too think she is beautiful.
But I do feel bad for that kid.
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It’s so funny how we don’t talk anymore
It’s so funny why we don’t talk anymore
But it ain’t losing sleep
And I ain’t counting sheep.
It’s so funny how we don’t talk anymore.
They look like they smell. Bad.
Nice hat you hipster douche, do they sell it men's sizes?
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Name Deleted: Me, too. I really liked that movie. It's funny. Where is that idiot? I just went to the Tattoo Boy thread (where ba-buttns got all hoity toity) and didn't see.
I know we love to hate on her but I saw her in Factory Girl playing Edie Sedgwick and I thought she did a great job AND was unbelievably pretty. She really is a beautiful woman IMO....when she's not fucking someone's husband that is. lol! Bawahaaa!
i pity that poor child. i can't wait until babies aren't the 'new black' anymore.