I had to fall back in my chair a bit and tilt my head to the side to make sure Necole Bitchie didn’t get it wrong and mislabel this as Beyonce instead of a light-skinned Mo’Nique in a luxurious new mane. But yeah, some employee of a Vancouver department store took this picture of Beyonce from a surveillance camera (yeah, I guess we’re doing that now) as she shopped earlier this week. This picture of Beyonce looking so swole that I’m surprised her wig didn’t pop off should shut down the vicious talk that she’s keeping a South American surrogate in a Tribeca apartment, but I’m not buying it.
Beyonce obviously Jessica Simpson-ized one of her pictures by running it through the FatBooth app, then she Photoshopped it over the background of a Vancouver department store and leaked it herself! Either that or she got reverse lipo on her face and won’t leave her house unless she’s wearing one of Tyler Perry’s Madea fat suits. Yup, both of those theories are totally plausible and reasonable. There’s really no shame in Beyonce’s STUNT QUEEN game.