Skeletor Wants Full Custody Of The Dragon Tales Twins

The sound of a high-pitched, virgin blood-curdling wailing poured out of Castle Grayskull on the day that pictures came out of JLo's hobbit whore playing with her children in Hawaii and so it's no surprise that Skeletor wants REVENGE! The easiest way to destroy JLo would be to switch the things she loves most (see: her diamonds) with cheap rhinestones since the bitch can't start her day until she sniffs the luxury fumes off of them while telling them how much they mean to her, but Skeletor thinks he has a better idea. Skeletor is going after (cue up lightning bolt sound effect) THE CHILDREN!!!!

Some source tells UsWeekly that Skeletor and JLo's child custody negotiations were going smoothly until he found out that her 24-year-old piece has been hanging around the kids. Skeletor is thinking about going against everything he promised to ruin that bitch. The source said, "He wants to make Jennifer suffer because she's having fun with someone new, and he knows this will hurt her on the deepest level."

Um. If JLo was a pool, she'd be all shallow end, so I don't know where the source is going with this "deepest level" shit. There's two levels in JLo's soul: the first is MONEY and the second is MEEEEEE! There's no basement. But Skeletor still shouldn't go through with this. If he takes the Dragon Tales Twins away, who is JLo going to whore out in a magazine spread when she needs some quick attention? Without any kids to whore out, she'll want to make some new ones with that Casper Smart troll. She'll hire a team of scientists to speed up Casper's puberty and make his balls drop so he can start churning the sperm out. Then they'll start spawning! Can you imagine what their babies would look like? I'm sure you just did and the image that terrorized your head looked a lot like Griphook with a pacifier in his mouth. So please, Skeletor, don't do this. Don't do this for humanity's sake!

Posted by: Michael K

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Submitted by iHeartHaters on Sat, 12/24/2011 - 12:06am.

DAYUM, those kids r UUUUUUUGLEEEEEEEEE!

~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♥~♦¤♦~♥~

FANTA FANTA, NO COKE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lnRDU4LdZE

Meat Loaf was in the middle of a show when his knees suddenly hit the stage floor like a narcoleptic bat out of hell ~MK

Submitted by Domina X on Fri, 12/23/2011 - 11:55pm.

Jennifer can fuck who she wants and if she chooses to allow media the opportunity to sensationalize that, then that is her choice. WHo cares.

If Marc wants to piss her off in the deepest way, he needs to hook up publicly with a hot young female(George Clooney style), write her a song and get serious then knock her up.

If Marc wants to appear the 'better' person(which most people wont notice since he gave the finger to cameras recently), he will just not react to Jennifer's new fling with Casper & conceal his misery as best he can.

As for the comments on the kid's appearance, that is pathetic, they are innocent children who did not choose to be in the media and be judged so shallowly for their looks, unfortunately they were born into the critical spotlight.

The stupid parents are attention whores, but lay off the nasty remarks on the little one's come on, they don't deserve that and they certainly can't control whether they are deemed beautiful or not in the public eye.

Submitted by Sookie on Thu, 12/22/2011 - 9:44pm.

What the actual fuck???? Those are some ugly ass kids. @.@

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"This is straight up fuckery."
His Holiness MK, 9/03/08

Submitted by K2 on Thu, 12/22/2011 - 8:01am.

With all the money she has (which would cut out any dependency), I just dont understand why she can never take a breather from jumping onto another dick! Enjoy your money, your kids, your family and friends ... and when the divorce is finalized THEN go bed hopping...shit.

And in Skeletor's defenese, I dont see her having ANY quality time to spend with her children ... betw the commercials, movies, red carpet events, American Idol and vacations with her "employee"... when does she have time for 2 toddlers?! NEVER ! I dont know if he's the better parent but he might be the more hands on.

Submitted by LisaL on Thu, 12/22/2011 - 6:22am.

Man, those kids better smack their momma for making HIM their daddy.
Those kids def got his looks.... poor things.

Submitted by SCLizard on Thu, 12/22/2011 - 6:19am.

I was visiting my hometown this week and spotted billboards for a divorce/custody attorney:

Get even. Call Steven.

Skeletor needs to hook up with this unethical fucker.

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"The sanest days are mad"...morrissey

Submitted by Condi the ingro... on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 11:14pm.

Boy, troll is right - that Casper kid is butt-ugly. Don't know why Lopez isn't using her millions for a pretty boy (or even man), but hey, different strokes.

Anyhoo, Skeletor doesn't have any chance of getting those kids if the divorce is in California, even if his ex is playing with a roomful of ugly young trolls. The kids always go to the mom.

Florida may be a different story, though.

Submitted by christine the hoff on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 7:16pm.

He's so scary ugly, she's such a cunt, they'd prolly be better off being raised by wolves.

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Don't stand on my tits, bitch!

Submitted by zsazsaitsme on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 6:35pm.

Unfortunate looking kids ... fugly, I'm sorry to say, rarely becomes gorgeous as it grows up. Oh and the pic of J's first nose --- eeeeek. I feel really sorry for those poor things, worse things are yet to come for them.

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"I'm sorry you feel that way ..... may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits"

Submitted by Hysteria on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 6:30pm.

Not the most attractive coconuts to fall from the tree.

I hope things turn out of for them, the coconuts that is.
.
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Submitted by Scott in NYC on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 5:37pm.

JLo is a hideous non-human whose biggest love is herself but I'm sure she loves her kids as much as she can. I feel sorry for them, though, because, as another person posted, they will see A LOT of temporary men and women in their parents' lives and their mom will be clinging to her long-gone youth for the rest of her life. Sad.

Submitted by SANS FARDS on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 5:08pm.

ffs...can't these celeb couples ever just get divorced, without all the fucking drama? That only ends up hurting the kids.

smh.

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Never question Bruce Dickinson!

Submitted by Darth Stoner on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 5:08pm.

The ugly children belong to the one who gave them the ugly.

Daddyyyyyyyyyyy

Submitted by She Stinks on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 5:01pm.

Neither one of them should have these kids, but he's a better choice to have them. She is a self centered disgusting egotistical bitch. She has ignored these children as soon as they came flying out of her used up cooter.

Submitted by sinjin on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 4:45pm.

I hope JeLo's monkeys are brainy because they sure hit every UGLY branch on the fall from the evolutionary tree. Dayum!
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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)

Submitted by sinjin on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 4:43pm.

Submitted by parissucksliterally: Sweetas, a man is gone if my DOG doesn't like him..:)

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/\ THIS!!!

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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)

Submitted by Bizzarelife on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 4:08pm.

Okay...so...let's see. She is a fame whore with a genuine brat complex. He is a possessive idiot. Terrific parenting material.

I say you can date whomever you want, but keep it quiet. Do NOT take pictures, do NOT date people you work with, and do NOT let them around your children. If this person is appropriate and it has been a sufficient amount of time, then introduce your kids. I always thought being a Mom first and foremost was the most important. Naturally, she is a woman, and has her own needs. However, dating this little piece of nothing so quickly may not have been the best thing she could have done.

This man looks like a Chihuahua. Not attractive by any means. He also has the personality of a gnat. Why on earth did she marry him anyway? You cannot possibly tell me he had a golden personlity. I do not believe this in the slightest.

Off topic: My pain in the ass colleague is still at work. WHY don't the annoying ones every disappear?

Submitted by pixxxie on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 3:44pm.

going for full custody sure doesn't bode well with the rumors of him being broke as a joke and her being sick of paying for his back taxes and all that

Submitted by govt_cheese on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 3:12pm.

Why is she wearing Mrs. Roper's Saturday night negligee on stage?

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As useless as a saggy pair of tits

Submitted by gucci on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 2:39pm.

Jlo is a known whore who only cares about herself and shelter has kids he's barley seen with. that said neither one of them should have these kids give them to the grandparents and call it a day!

_________________

"The world is a pretty nice place if you're happy"

John Garfield
No one lives forever

Submitted by Stan Hooper on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 2:12pm.

Good for Skelator. It may not work since most judges will grant kids to Mommy but its a wake up call to JHo to stop her shanagans and stop fame whoring her kids with her new piece of cock.

Man, that's JLo's had some good nose reduction there because her nose was "spread" out like a slab of concrete back in those In Living Color days.

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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie

Submitted by media_lush on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 1:54pm.

C'mon MK, you of all people should know that he doesn't want the kids to be brought up as scientologists..... the apparent reason for the divorce in the first place!

Submitted by Webberbear on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 1:28pm.

Oh my God, I never saw this photo before. Look at that azz! :0

http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/20900000/jennifer-lopez-young-jlo...

Submitted by Fujicat on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 1:26pm.

My divorce attorney once told me: "It's all about the money. That's it." She was right.

If Skelly gets the spawn, he doesn't have to pay Ho Ho (and her Twinkee with a rap sheet) support and maintenance. Plus he can raise the unfortunate looking children as proper Sci-bots. Win win.

__________________________

Fair is foul and foul is fair..

Submitted by precociousmagpie on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 1:26pm.

Those kids look like they have Progeria.They are UGGG-LEEE. Sure, go ahead, dress the little gremlin like Jerry Mahoney. That'll help.

Submitted by Webberbear on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 1:25pm.

Here's a lovely old pic of JLo:

http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/20900000/jennifer-lopez-young-jlo...

Submitted by But_Im_A_Member on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 5:49pm.

Maybe the kids will grow into their looks...they're cute in a Benjamin Button kinda way, I guess.
So tired of people using their kids as pawns. Personally, I wouldn't bring a boyfriend around my kids unless I was serious about him, a few months into the relationship or so. But unless they're rounding second base in front of the chirruns, Marc is just being petty and looking for any half decent reason to fuck with her. It's hurting his macho little ego to know she's moved on, and relatively fast at that. Luckily he's got his drugs to keep him company! I'm pretty sure we'll hear more of this story...this is novela status for sure!

"I know that I'm going to be a target, but I'm never going to be a victim". - Justin Bieber

Submitted by LaChaylo on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 1:11pm.

Poor kids. Watch them be the latino versions of Willow and Jaden Smith. ¡Dios mio!

Submitted by Message In A Bottle on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:57pm.

IMO just give full custody of the kids to one of the 50 nannies.

I don't get why these celebs have kids only to have nannies raise them.

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"The older you get, the wiser you get...unless you're a banana!" - Rose Nylund

Submitted by Message In A Bottle on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:55pm.

Submitted by Athina on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 1:33pm.

Oh for fuck's sake, JLO is an idiot. Nothing turns otherwise amicable divorce proceedings bitter and spiteful faster than the introduction of the new girlfriend/boyfriend. I just saw it with a divorce I'm handling now. Stupid ass hubby (my client of course) posts tons of pics on Facebook of his new piece along with her huge implants in a bikini, holding the kids. Mom went ballistic and has filed every motion known to man to drag his ass back into court.

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My ex-fiance tried to pull that shit on me. Day after he called it off (on Facebook, nonetheless), he posted many a pictures of him and his new piece with lovey dovey statuses. Granted at the time it hurt like hell but I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction. I ignored it all.

He ended up looking like a huge jackass in the end :D

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"The older you get, the wiser you get...unless you're a banana!" - Rose Nylund

Submitted by Hotmami on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:54pm.

Neither one of them gives a flying fuck about those kids.

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Time cast a spell on you but
You won't forget me
I know I could have loved you but
You would not let me
-Fleetwood Mac

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:50pm.

Sweetas, a man is gone if my DOG doesn't like him....let alone if/when I have a child! :)

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Whenever I see your smiling face, I have to smile myself
Because I love you
-James Taylor

Submitted by Sweetas on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:48pm.

((PSL)) I absolutely agree that the kids don't need to meet any of mom's hook-ups. It also hurts them when they get attached to someone and then they're suddenly gone, never to be heard from again. So yeah, only after you know you're really interested in each other should they meet the kids, and then as your friend. Still, fairly early on so that you're not all that invested when your kid goes "Ew Mom, he's a jewk" (deal breaker for me). lol

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:38pm.

Deb, have you seen her face before all her surgery? Her genes aren't so great either.

google pics from the early 90's. Fly girl pics. EEEuuuwwww.

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I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
-P!nk

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:35pm.

Sweetas, I'll meet you halfway. But definitely a couple of months into it, so you make sure YOU like this person enough to introduce them. And yes, NO affection at all in front of the kids.

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I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
-P!nk

Submitted by guest on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:32pm.

Skeletor is a jelli h8r!

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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.

Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:35pm.

I don't think Marc Anthony is THAT ugly. I can actually (kind-of) see what JLo saw in him. He has confidence and swag. That Casper kid just looks like a dumbass. I have a hard time believing that Marc Anthony would be seriously butt-hurt over his fling with JLo. If anything, he should be laughing at what a desperate hag she looks like.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Douchechill!

Submitted by KidL on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:30pm.

I'm sorry, but those kids are homely-looking. Then again, I never thought JLO was that great looking to begin with.

Submitted by Two Drink Min on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:28pm.

OI! So file for full custody cause she moved on already? Yeah it sucks and so many people (men and women do this). Are they doing this because they think having their ex move on is hurting the kids or hurting them. It's supposed to be what's best for the child, not the parent. Went through this sort of, my baby's father thought it was only proper that if I start dating he get to meet and approve any new beau. PSYCHO!

Full custody is not easy to obtain. In the end it's just hell on the kids.

Submitted by Sweetas on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:20pm.

I have to disagree with everyone saying you should wait till you're serious before your piece meets the kids. I mean, what if they hate each other?? I think it's best to introduce them as your friend pretty early on, keep your hands off each other and keep the visits pretty short to see how they interact. Letting them meet the guy you picked up at the bar who's dressing as he heads out the door - NO. Letting them meet a guy you've been dating a few weeks - why not?

Submitted by Deb on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:17pm.

Submitted by dementa on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 1:41pm.
I just don't understand why a woman as vain as JeLo would want such an ugly man as her baby daddy. If I was selfish, rich and amoral like her, I'd just get some hot-man sperm, knock myself up, and be assured of pretty kids.
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I believe that JLo got together with Marc Anthony as a career move to give her "cred" with the Latino community. The babies were probably a career move, too, and she just hoped they would get her genes. Oh well. Can't win 'em all.
BTW, brilliant post, MK. "all shallow end" indeed.

"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson

Submitted by guest on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:16pm.

Jack!!! *waves wildly* XOs...lol.

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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:15pm.

dementa, right? Those kids look like him, and her old face. Not cute at all.

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I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
-P!nk

Submitted by Webberbear on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:15pm.

JLo had been living beyond her means for years and needed the millions that Anthony had to support the lifestyle she believed she deserved. Then she went through BOTH of their money like water (hence the need for "American Idol" and crappy commercial endorsements). She made a deal with the devil by marrying a notorious Napoleon like Anthony, though.
I thought it was only a matter of time before this one got ugly.

Submitted by suckandfuck on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:14pm.

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 1:42pm.

deafening are the silent whispers that linger from the blood soaked lips. *gets duct tape*
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hmmm are you jesus? what is this poetry!!!

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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:12pm.

Submitted by suckandfuck on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 1:36pm.

oolollo oh the echo of stranger's cumming, it's my neighbors favorite sound!!
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deafening are the silent whispers that linger from the blood soaked lips. *gets duct tape*
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"Dog, Jack drinks exclusively at the Braille Bar." EastEndGirl, 11/01/2011

Submitted by dementa on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:11pm.

I just don't understand why a woman as vain as JeLo would want such an ugly man as her baby daddy. If I was selfish, rich and amoral like her, I'd just get some hot-man sperm, knock myself up, and be assured of pretty kids.

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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.

Submitted by suckandfuck on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:06pm.

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 1:35pm.

Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 1:31pm.

"Then they could move into little studio apartments and get their fuck on... Just like men do."
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It's rainin cold hard facts up in hurrr. Secrets revealed!!
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oolollo oh the echo of stranger's cumming, it's my neighbors favorite sound!!

Submitted by suckandfuck on Wed, 12/21/2011 - 12:06pm.

Have we asked the nannies how they feel about this? They are the ones taking care of the BABEHS I am sure with my psychic abilities.