Terrence And Michelle Howard’s Divorce Is Still Going Smoothly

Terrence Howard and Michelle Howard’s divorce fight is turning into the dirtiest of dirties asses and not even a stack of Hazmat-made baby wipes could clean up this mess. The first shot was fired by Michelle when she filed papers claiming that Terry Chris Brown’ed her in the face and threatened to kill her ass. It’s Terry’s turn to fire a shot and he did just that yesterday when he filed a declaration claiming that Michelle is a bag of crazy covered in a thick layer of racist bitch.

TMZ says that Terry said in the documents that he thought he was marrying a sweet, loving kitten, but after they got married, a white hood grew out of her head and she regularly called him a “monkey” and some other names that sound like they were ripped directly from a Dutch’s magazine profile on Rihanna. Terry says in the declaration that Michelle once screamed at him: “I never wanted to marry a n**ger in the first place and I definitely didn’t want to be the step mother of some n**ger kids.”

Michelle is allegedly trying to get Terry to buy back a video clip she stole from his computer of him taking a shower, and she apparently told him that if he went to the police she’d get her Russian friends to knock him off. The portrait of a lovely marriage doesn’t stop there either. Despite Michelle’s claims that Terry whooped her ass, he says she’s the one who attacked him with a bottle out of jealousy.

So let’s just go over all of this. Michelle is trying to paint Terry as a lady-beating crazy and he’s trying to paint her as a man-beating racist who married a black man even though she’s a fucking racist. Okay. Makes sense. If I was the judge in this case, I’d sentence both of them to their rooms and I’d make them lay down and wait for this cat to come to stroke the fuckery out of them.

Seriously, both of these crazy bitch motherfuckers need to go to bed.