Mortal enemies LeAnn Rimes and Brandi Glanville resisted the urge to shank each other in the jaw with their clavicle bones yesterday afternoon when they both showed up to watch Brandi and Eddie Cibrian’s son play in a soccer game. Sadly, the game’s halftime show featuring LeAnn and Brandi in a BONY BITCH BRAWL (which I’m sure would look like two erect pencil dicks sword fighting in a dead pony’s mouth) was canceled, because the two stayed away from each other. But the shriveled and dehydrated clitoris of a Falcor did get in a few shots when she sucked on Eddie’s face and played with Brandi’s boys right in front of everyone.
But Brandi still got off easy. It could’ve been much worse. If Brandi opened her mouth for any reason (examples: yawning at LeAnn’s STUNT QUEEN moves, dry barfing over the fact that LeAnn looks like a paraplegic pony balancing on stilts made of chopsticks, etc…), LeAnn would’ve slithered down her throat, taken over her body and finally become the Brandi Glanville she’s always wanted to be!