Hot Slut Of The Day!
The Bachelor’s new season starts next month and ABC has let out their latest white girl parade featuring the desperate eHarmony refugees who will try to get fake engaged to a man who has the personality of dead foreskin. Most of the pictures look like they were taken at the 10th reunion of Tiger Woods’ side hos (or at Clothestime’s new employee orientation circa 1998). It’s just bland bitch in a busted blouse after bland bitch in a busted blouse until I got to the seasoned sexy siren that is SHERYL!!!!! Sheryl doesn’t have a Chico’s kind of day, Chico’s has a Sheryl kind of day. Pry your attention away from the dollop of JcPenney hair salon perfection on top of her head and get into her bio:
Age: Age is just a number
Occupation: Grabbing life when and wherever I can
Do you like being the center of attention or do you prefer being more mysterious and why?
Definitely the center of attentionWhat is your biggest date fear?
RejectionWhat does your ideal mate look like?
Tall, Dark, and Handsome like BenTattoo Count:
0If you really wanted to impress a man what would you do and why?
I’d do almost anything. I believe in taking risks in order to get the man I love.
Unfortunately, Sheryl isn’t one of the contestants. ABC is using Sheryl as a STUNT QUEEN pawn and she’s only in the first episode to introduce her granddaughter who is one of those bland bitches. The Bachelor is supposed to think that Sheryl is the Demi Moore (Demi Moore wishes) of the group and is actually competing for a fake engagement with him. Yeah, what a funny joke. “HAHA” – no one. Fuck ABC. Fuck The Bachelor. Fuck those boring hos. I haven’t even seen Sheryl in motion and she’s already won the final rose of my heart. Fixodent and forget those other bitches.