Sinead O’Connor Has Finally Found A Man Who Loves The Difficult Brown As Much As She Does

Sinead O’Connor will have to change one of the lyrics in Nothing Compares 2 U to “I went to the doctor and guess what he told me, guess what he told me, he said, gurl your asshole is about to explode” (been there, heard that), because after a long search she has finally found her hole mate soulmate who will regularly battle “the difficult brown” with her until divorce does them part.

Back in August, a horny as all hell Sinead posted a personal ad on her own website where she wrote that she was looking for a 40-something, anal-loving, half-blind, employed, hairy rugby player who doesn’t have the name “Brian or Nigel” on his drivers license. The search has officially been called off, because Sinead announced on her blog that she’s making her boyfriend Barry Herridge her fourth husband tomorrow. As Sinead’s brown sugar walls quiver in anticipation of the wedding night, she typed this announcement out on her blog:

With enormous joy myself and my beloved boyfriend Barry Herridge will be getting married tomorrow, December 8th 2011 at ‘an un-disclosed location’ in my absolute dream wedding ceremony. We will post a photo or two here on the site as soon as possible afterward.
Very happy girl. : )

What a romantic love story. It was just a few months ago that Sinead was begging for dick online and now she’s getting married to the villain from Megamind. There really is hope for all of us. Who cares if Sinead’s last marriage barely died a quick death back in April! Who cares if her latest marriage is eventually going to split in two like a picture of the Pope in her own hands! Who cares if her new husband’s got 10 pounds of brain in a 5 pound skull! Who cares if when Sinead and Barry bow their heads to thank God for the genitals they’re about to eat she has to use a crane to pull his head back up! The only thing that matters is that Sinead is FINALLY getting some regular peen.