“Tom Kaun” Is All The Rage In India

December 6, 2011 / Posted by:

When Tommy Girl arrived at an airport in Mumbai to start promoting Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol in India, hundreds of screaming fans were waiting to get a peek at the completely heterosexual face that makes all mortal women instantly fall in love with it. Well, just like Katie Holmes, those “fans“were paid to act like they give a shit house shit about Tommy. The blog First Post (via Videogum) claims that a model management agency hired at least 200 people and gave all of them around $3 to play the role of a Tom Cruise fan. The best part is that most of them don’t even know Tom Cruise from a bossy bottom garden gnome (that is a trick game, because there is no difference). One of the paid actors explained it to First Post like this:

“Tom kaun? (Ed note. That is a perfect name for him if you think about it) I don’t know who he is or what he does. We were told to come here by 1pm today and wait for a foreign VIP to come out of the airport gate and scream and shout when he came. None of us know who Tom is. There was a buffet lunch also for us and we were paid Rs 150 for this job today. We do this for television shows and other such events where crowds are required.”

If this is true.. Oh, slap me with a Suri heel, of course this shit is true. This is Tommy Girl I’m blogging about. You show me a ho who froths at the mouth over Tommy’s greatness and I’ll show you a copy of the check Scientology wrote them to do so. But I can’t completely make fun of Tommy for this. Tommy needs those pats on the head to go on. He’s sort of like my Chihuahua that way. If I don’t give him positive reinforcement, he’ll just lick his own asshole in his doggy condo all day and will refuse to do anything I ask.

And those people who were paid $3 to scream for Tommy for 30 minutes got off easy. Stepford Katie doesn’t even get a buffet lunch and she has to play the role of a Tom Cruise fan for the next 5 years or until her contract is finally up. You have it easy, Tom Kaun fans.

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