Yes, JLo, We Get It. Your Chocha Is Free Again.

Because JLo no longer has to face the controlling Puerto Rican wrath Skeletor vomits out at her every time she flop fucks the stage like a Real Housewife mermaid in heat, she went pussy-out wild at last night's AMAs. I thoroughly believe that there is no retirement age for doing ho shit, so I have no words of hate for 42-year-old JLo shoving her Thanksgiving dinner for 12 all over Pitbull's bulge. (Side note: Even though Pitbull's peen probably tastes like Drakkar Noir and he uses his own spit as lube, I'd still let him bite, lockjaw or whatever me. I so would. Judge me or report me to the ASPCA all you want.)

JLo started her performance by earning another Razzie for her staged breakdown and then she continued to strip like a lunch shift stripper until all she had on was Brit Brit's streched-out bodysuit. For real, though, JLo's performance was really nothing more than a joint commercial for Fiat and her liberated vagina. I kept waiting for this bitch to run over a Skeletor cardboard cutout with her Fiat to really drive the point into our brains.

We get it. JLo wants all of us to buy a car that costs less than her annual labia bleaching bill and she's HORNY! Keep fucking that Fiat, JLo, but nobody's ever going to believe that you actually drive one of those things when a camera isn't around.

Wireimage, Wenn.com

Posted by: Michael K

•

Ho Shit • JLo • Puts The Assy In Classy

Submitted by Gardening Girl on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:44am.

PLEAZZZZZZZZZZZ drop the squeeged back hair and NO not for one hot second do I belive she'd drive that wanna be VW beetle!

Submitted by PrettyHateMachine on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:43am.

She looks good for 42, but i'm so over her.

She must have hired Pimp Mama Kris for a new manager, advertising during an award show performance must be a new type of low.

Submitted by Deb on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:43am.

Not for nothing, but if a semi-attactive sheep rammed her butt into most men, they'd go for it too.
Obvious is so easy.

"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson

Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:43am.

(Side note: Even though Pitbull's peen probably tastes like Drakkar Noir and he uses his own spit as lube, I'd still let him bite, lockjaw or whatever me. I so would. Judge me or report me to the ASPCA all you want.)

ME TOO MK
and Britney did it better!

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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11

Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:43am.

Yeah, she's totally fuckable...I just wouldn't want to watch, necessarily...

♥ Threadkilla!
Lean Like a Chola, Celebrity Stylez: http://youtu.be/0ZwdYeGSVS0

Submitted by AGame on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:42am.

hahah - her boy toy is on stage with her...

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what's in your taco?: a. chicken b. beef c. fish d. QUEEF

Submitted by Manimal5 on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:42am.

That body condom thing and really she doesn't have PSLs ass at all!

Submitted by letinstar on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:41am.

one thing for sure is jlo is sucking on the right peens and such because she is everywhere thinking she's the hot shyt...
_____________________________________________
"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:41am.

J Lo is gorgeous. I have always said she is an example of how to do plastic surgery. Always subtle improvements. She was not pretty at all in her fly girl days.

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How dare you say that my behavior is unacceptable
So condescending unnecessarily critical
I have the tendency of getting very physical
So watch your step cause if I do you'll need a miracle

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:40am.

She could be fucking a goat on stage and I would still find her boring as shit.
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"Dog, Jack drinks exclusively at the Braille Bar." EastEndGirl, 11/01/2011

Submitted by Deb on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:40am.

My cats sing better and my 94 year old granny-in-law dances better.
Why, oh why is such abject mediocrity so handsomely rewarded?
You know, Skelator may have been a controlling little rat, but at least he kept this raging ho in her clothes for a few years.

"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson

Submitted by Tony Perkis on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:39am.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 11:07am.

Get over yourself, ho. BTW, the two or three posts of yours I DID happen to see were all talking about weight and bodies, just not your own grisly ass.

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Attention campers, lunch has been cancelled today, due to lack of hustle. Deal with it...

Submitted by rukiddingme on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:39am.

I see she had her boy toy next to her on the stage.

www.petfinder.com - enter your zip code to find adoptable pets in your area.

www.animalrescuesite.com - click everyday to help feed animals in shelters.

Submitted by dementa on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:39am.

Yeah, another bitch for whom the late 90s and early 00s will never die, since those were her glory years. Bitch, retire the faux-nudie catsuits. you look stupid, and nobody wears them anymore except Shitney.

That said, I have been waiting for this for a long time. JeLo is a whore and the only thing she's good for is outraging us by stealing men, whoring it up and being nouveau riche. Her marriage to Skeletor was BORING.

*********

I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.

Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:39am.

That unitard thing really is fug...BUT if she stuck her ass out at me like that I'd grab her waist NO PROBLEM and shag the hell out of her.

I'm just saying..

Submitted by Dog on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:38am.

Hey, she looks fantastic but that won't take away the fact that she can't sing.

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www.charitywater.org

www.theanimalrescuesite.com

www.modestneeds.org

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:38am.

oh, and like J Lo would be caught DEAD in a fucking Fiat.

Submitted by AGame on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:38am.

srsly?? a fiat on stage? give me a damn break. she is the worst

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what's in your taco?: a. chicken b. beef c. fish d. QUEEF

Submitted by Datura on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:38am.

I kind of like her black doily dress.

My father, who usually has discerning (if not snobbish) taste, thinks JLo is the most "bee-yoo-tiful" actress in the world. lol

*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*
"Oh, man. There's nothing worse than when you're trying to rub it in some haten ass hoes faces and the nurses bring your baby in and want you to feed it and shit."
-- The Mayor of Bethville on 'STFU, Par

Submitted by Tony Perkis on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:37am.

Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 11:03am.

Why she be wearing Britney's hand-me-downs?

ahaha, my first thought, too.

And those SHOES are SOOOO Rue 21 discount bin circa 2003...YIKES. She does look good, though she's worthless and untalented and needs to learn to say "no" to bodysuits and trying to sing.

Pitbull is gross but I'd fuck 'im.

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Attention campers, lunch has been cancelled today, due to lack of hustle. Deal with it...

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:37am.

Her body looks fantastic, but NOT in that bodysuit. And J Lo, you are 42 years old. Put some fucking clothes on. Come on, you look fucking pathetic.

Hey, that is about 15 comments I have made now that I WASN'T TALKING ABOUT MY ASS. I am sure someone is taking notes and counting.