When "Move That Cone, I'm Lindsay Lohan!" Doesn't Work The Way It Used To
Lindsay Lohan might be able to get a corner booth at the IHOP on Santa Monica at 3am on a weekday and she might be able to get the middle table at the methadone clinic cafeteria, but her days of dropping her name to get into A-list parties jumped into the grave with her career a long time ago. Bitch still thinks she's a glittering star in the universe that is Hollywood when the fact is that she's a dusty glow-in-the-dark ceiling star that fell to the carpet and no longer glows in the dark. But ho doesn't know that, because Page Six says that she showed up to the party for J. Edgar at the Roosevelt Hotel on Thursday night and the dude at the door hit her with a giant DEEEEEE-NIEEEEEED at first. The line of people behind her probably broke the record for the most THIS BITCH head shakes in one place at the same time.
LiLo is eternally the little cokey who could, because the source says not having an ounce of dignity paid off and she was able to beg her way in. The source went on to say this shit:
“Lindsay was arguing with the security to let her in, dropping every celebrity’s name to get in. She could be heard saying, ‘I have to go and see Leo.’Eventually they let her in, but she made everybody uncomfortable. She was aggressive and random, storming around. She tried to get to Leo, but he was surrounded by his security and a posse of his friends.
Clint and Leo and Dustin Lance Black were talking, and Lindsay sent one of her aides over, demanding to get a photo with them, but security shooed them away.”
LiLo's rep is kept on a steady diet of delusion-tinis by White Oprah, so when asked for a comment they said, “She did not crash, she was invited by a guest who attended the event. I am not aware of her asking for photos with Leo or Clint. She was never asked to leave.”
My first thought about LiLo crashing a party and trying to scoot up to Leonardo DiCatchAHo was that the whole thing is pathetic wrapped in sad wrapped in tragic wrapped in another thick layer of pathetic, but then I really thought about. The two whiskeys I drank last night I paid for using cash from my own wallet. The dozens of whiskeys LiLo probably shoved down her booze hole came from an open bar and I bet you she snatched a few of the bartender's tips before making her way out. So being a shameless mess pays off sometimes.
Note to Hollywood: If you want to keep LiLo out of your parties, have a cash bar only. Bitch is allergic to those.
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Where do you guys see a dress? All i see is a cardigan like the one i wore to work yesterday, but since i can`t let my titties hang out at work, i wore something underneath...
And i say she looks better than she normally does. Still , she looks a good 20 years older than she is and like she hasn`t had any sleep since the Reagan Era.
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Well, aren't you just the cosmopolitan Queen Bee of Cuntsville? No, I'm sorry, of "Cuntropolis". Please excuse us in all of our inbred grandpa fucking glory. Karen Flatts, 09/21/11
Linds is writing her own autobiographical movie, right before our eyes. Act I, Stardom. Act II, Downfall. Act III, Blacklisted/Disgraced. She's on act III now. Hope the kid shapes up and stops writing this cliched script of a life she's got, because Act IV is the final curtain.
Submitted by Arlene Machiavelli on Sat, 11/05/2011 - 4:23pm.
The outfit is not very fresh and youthful.
She probably got her inspiration from a "fashion blogger".
It's supposed to be "sexy" in an "ironic way".
Good point Mike.
Flash and Makeup are magical!!
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Sat, 11/05/2011 - 4:14pm.
Are we all looking at the same picture? Because I think she looks like some 50 yr old Florida housewife out for a night on the town in Boca.
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I think that "looking good" comments are made based on whom they are addressed towards. Like, if it were someone normal, no-one would think that that's a good look, but as it's Lindsay they do.
I also think she looks good, for her.
Her hair is disgusting. I bet it feels like straw.
The outfit is not very fresh and youthful. That's coming from someone who practically lives in black clothes.
If her dress was a bit sexier she may not have had the housewifery look. Seriously though she looks good..
Healthy young and pretty. Could this be a sign of good things to come?
Sure, she looks better than normal in that pic, but she's wearing a shitload of makeup, and there's a lot of "flash" in that pic.
Speaking of the OTHER skank with a terrible image, people are finally coming forward with this! (I know WE know, but behind the scenes people are admitting it now)
http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2011/10/kim-kardashian-wedding-hoa...
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We can't go on just running away
If we stay any longer, we will surely never get away
Anything you want - we can make it happen
Stand up and turn around, never let them shoot us down
Never - never
Submitted by Hekki on Sat, 11/05/2011 - 4:04pm.
LOL @ "one of her aides". Who would sign up for that job? I bet people quit on her ass ALL THE TIME.
I can picture some temp agency counselor explaining "Now this job only pays $8.00 an hour, but you'll be attending a very hip nightclub in the company of a very famous celebrity. Your job is just to be there for whatever she needs."
-That's like every temp agency assistant job in HWood! Unless you're traveling you get low pay with "perks" like being the ugliest one in the club or wiping the toilet seat before the "star" sits on it. And then there are those temp agency whore factories that fool girls into "working" for movie stars.
Ugh, I'm too serious for this thread. I need a nap.
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"Why do people call it a muff?! That shit has ruined sleigh rides for me.."
Submitted by ritzyroxie on Thu, 10/20/2011 -
She looks good in that picture (I can't believe I'm fucking admitting it), but it's only because she has a shitload of makeup on to disguise those hideous, stink-eminating freckles of hers. And yeah, she must have come straight from the Playboy shoot -- only their makeup artists can disguise nasty pussy like that.
Are we all looking at the same picture? Because I think she looks like some 50 yr old Florida housewife out for a night on the town in Boca.
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Wow Lilo cleans up nice!! She looks pretty good here.
Sad about the party I'm embarrassed for her.
She used to be so adored and now abhorred.
I really wish she could get on track with her career, but it just gets worse with each passing day.
I dunno- doormen being cruel always bothers me. It's just a damn party-every party needs a crazy. And this girl makes money by just existing, which is not a legit career, but doormen tend to pick on vulnerable people to feel superior, while they themselves don't have a high salary or a "classy" career. And people and guys inside rarely care that much and would welcome the entertainment. Let the cokey in, I say.
(I have had bad doormen experiences...*hangs head in shame*)
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"Why do people call it a muff?! That shit has ruined sleigh rides for me.."
Submitted by ritzyroxie on Thu, 10/20/2011 -
Her face looks good. The rest of it reminds me of a fat, aging former Vegas showgirl who's operating a brothel out of her trailer home in the desert.
fucking pathetic
<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<
Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day. Wearing a backpack and a turtleneck is like a weak midget trying to bring you down.
-Mitch Hedberg(r.i.p)
Did you know Leo calls his posse of male friends "the pussy posse?" One of those dogs probably invited Lilo for a laugh or a bang, or both. She better have kept her nicotine-stained fingers off of Lukas Haas. I would have killed an orange ho to attend that party. Just kidding. No not really.
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"When I come up, I rush, I rush for you..."
And let this be our balm when we chafe at her ability to avoid punishment by the law.
She is persona non grata in Hollywood. NO ONE wants to be associated with this trashy jailbird.
So while she's gloating at getting slapped on the wrist in the courthouse, she's being snubbed by the people she considers important.
HA HA HA.
She obviously just came from her Playboy shoot. That is why she looks good.
I still fucking hate the blonde hair.
Leo will not be seen with her! She's a joke.
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We can't go on just running away
If we stay any longer, we will surely never get away
Anything you want - we can make it happen
Stand up and turn around, never let them shoot us down
Never - never
I heard she bribed the doorman with a dime bag of sea jasper...
_____________________对您的和平_____________________
We could have a straightner if you like...Or we could get the toys out..
I go back and forth on her. sometimes I think they should send her to the electric chair and other times I just think she is some kind of genius. She does what she wants. The things she wants to do are sad and dumb but she has earned a place of respect for getting away with it all for so long. I wasn't at a party with Leo and if I would have begged it wouldn't have worked so I have to give it to her.
http://burning-plastic.tumblr.com/
She actually looks GOOD in that pic. And that's because she has got HEAPS of makeup on. Lot's of foundation, mascara/eyeliner and lippy. She is obviously one of those women who needs loads of makeup to look good. Take off the makeup and she's back to freckly-fug.
When you reek of desperation and skank stank, you ain't going nowhere.
LOL @ "one of her aides". Who would sign up for that job? I bet people quit on her ass ALL THE TIME.
I can picture some temp agency counselor explaining "Now this job only pays $8.00 an hour, but you'll be attending a very hip nightclub in the company of a very famous celebrity. Your job is just to be there for whatever she needs." And then getting a nasty surprise when the Lohan people ignore the invoice.
She's putrid but I think she looks pretty good in this pic.
hahaha this was amazing. XD
...try wearing the orange cone on your head next time while flapping your methie freckled (love 'em) titties and vodka soaked beef curtains. Good luck, convict.
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The difficult brown?! I think we're all done here. -MK
I love that the most positive spin the PR guy could put on these shenanigans was, "She was never asked to leave." Excellent point, sir.