I know, this is the saddest holiday-themed Tijuana donkey show (without the donkey) any of us have ever seen.
Charles Dickens (“Did sumbody say dick?” – Katie Price) had a good run as the author of the most classic holiday novel of our time, but there’s a new literary genius on the stroll with a new classic holiday novel of our time! Katie Price hauled out the holly and burned up the mistletoe in London today when she came out to promote her new book “Santa Baby” and when asked by reporters what it’s about, she looked at the reindeer since he had about as much to do with writing the book as she did.
If the Tivo captions of every soft-core Cinemax porn are at the top of your must-read list, then Katie’s book is just for you. I’ve read two of them and it was like reading the transcript of Courtney Stodden’s edition of Hooked on Phonics. Katie likes her novels the same way she likes her men: shallow, hallow and filled with only 12 words from the English vocabulary. So, basically, she’s like my literary hero.
And that poor, sad reindeer does know that God gave him antlers so he can poke a bitch, right? Nudge..nudge…