Hot Slut Of The Day!

October 30, 2011 / Posted by:

For some of us drunk hos, today is the day we pray over a plate of bacon and ask it to perform a miracle by soothing our soul-charring hangovers with its drips of grease. And this sad happy story proves that miracles do happen. The Snoopy dog throwing you an over-the-shoulder look is Daniel, a beagle who is supposed to be barking at the angels in heaven, but came out of the pound’s doggy gas chamber (Note: The words “Doggy gas chamber” is the not-so-secret ingredient in the making of a serious sad face) alive.

The pound’s officials have declared him a miracle dog and named him after Daniel, the dude in the bible who survived the lion’s den. When a shelter in New Jersey found out about Daniel, they brought him up north and now they’re trying to find him a home. Here’s Daniel’s story. Grab the Benadryl, your “allergies” are going to start acting up again.

It makes my soul smile to know that Daniel survived the doggy gas chamber but then it makes my soul weep into a puddle of weepiness to know that the damn doggy gas chamber still exists. You know, in the olden days (just nod and go with me on this shit) if a dog cheated death they’d declare him the miracle chosen one and he’d become the new god on earth that we must all worship. So, join me in welcoming our new overlord, God Daniel.

via NYDN

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