In case you haven’t already chewed off a glow stick to this, here’s RiRi’s video for “We Found Love” which is like Trainspotting wrapped in Requiem for a Dream wrapped in every episode of Skins wrapped in ho shit wrapped in the vomit that comes out of your mouth when you eat nachos while high on Ecstasy. It’s an ass-to-ass and dead baby on the ceiling scene away from being a copyright infringement lawsuit!
But seriously, everybody is already putting up their magnifying glasses to this and dissecting all the pieces of it. They say the hot boxer/model dude, Dudley O’Shaughnessy, is a Fist Brown look-alike and so this is obviously like looking into their relationship through a kaleidoscope. You know, it’s all about how sometimes the stupid hugs your heart when you’re in love and it makes shit out pills, take baths in your damn clothes, dance on top of fast food tables and swallow the smoke load from the one you love.
But the bigger issue here is that RiRi barfs up ribbons. The bitch barfs up ribbons. Do you know how many asshole hos are going to get drunk at parties, shove ribbons in their mouth holes and then barf it up for a picture they plan to post on their Tumblr? We’ve had planking, owling, coning and now we’re going to have ribboning. Thanks, RiRi. I’ll curse your name as I pick up saliva ribbons off of my living room floor after a party.