The pat-and-peel Cracker Jack tattoos on the bargain basement Sam Merlotte!
The hot doorway dance moves (you know I love doorway dancing)!
The shower sex scene that looks like two crawdads steaming to death in a glass pot on a car-powered hot plate!
The bobbies shooting at bitches for robbing a convenience store!
The bobbies and their shit aim!
The bathroom stinking up worse than shit marinated in asparagus piss thanks to Brit Brit spraying that perfume around!
The raw emotional acting that should win several lifetime achievement Oscar Mayer awards!
Those are just some of the thoughts that jumped out of the broken toilet in my head while watching Brit Brit’s video for “Criminal.” If it was up to Brit Brit, the video would be 6 minutes of her reenacting Natural Born Killers with animal crackers, so this is twenty steps up from that. The only thing this is missing is a scene at the beginning of SPF in a jailbird outfit playing a Velveeta cheese flute as Officer Bit Bit looks on. (Never Forget Bit Bit.)