QOTD: Everybody Wants A Body Like Jodie Marsh's
Now that England's finest rose has tits like a T-Rex's ass boil, abs like a deep fried rack of ribs and a belly button that sort so of looks like an alligator's terrifying eye, she says everybody retinas are dripping with green liquid when they stare at her body. No, it's not because the sight of Jodie Marsh causes eyeballs to grow warts that leak green discharge. It's because jealous bitches are green with envy and will gladly give themselves roid enemas and shove a grill pan under their stomach skin if it means they can have a body just like hers. The most beautiful woman in Britain and the demure roid flower that has a crotch tattoo that is probably less terrifying than the crotch from which it's flying from said this about her gristle body to Heat (via Daily Mail):
"I feel proud when I look in the mirror. I still can’t believe it’s my body. Like, when I look at my abs, I’m just like, fucking hell, I love it so much! I’m the prettiest I’ve ever looked.
If you’re not in the bodybuilding world it is scary, but to me it’s normal. I think I still look really feminine. It has totally changed my life, doing this. My self-esteem is higher, my confidence is higher, I feel more secure, feel powerful – I almost feel invincible.
I do feel a bit like Superwoman. Now every single person around me is jealous of my body.'
The only shit that was around Jodie when she said this was a pile of salmon jerky and the alien that ripped through Kane's chest in Alien, so technically the bitch is telling the truth!
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Had she said that while still looking like this...
http://images.mirror.co.uk/upl/m4/may2009/7/8/jodie-marsh-for-new-image-...
I'd understand. But right now...bitch looks mannish.
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"'Those who danced were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.' We hear the music and we still think you're insane, bitch. For the record." [Michael K on Megan Fox]
The only thing feminine about female bodybuilders is their fake titty-sacks. I swear their grow an Adam's apple over night.
B!i!i!iD~
For your health.
What a sad sad human being, she makes me feel sorry for her. Almost!
yeah yeah i'm gonna get hate but-apart from the breast implants and what she has done to her face-i actually think she looks pretty good(really dont like to bodysnark btw). i've always had an admiration for bodybuilders (male and female) so i say good on her. its a pity shes has quite a few annoying traits/done some stupid things otherwise i would actually really like her.
I'm just flummoxed that somebody went to a plastic surgeon and asked for that nose.
It's nice to see that little Ali Lohan has put on some weight.
*chanting as always*
"I feel the burn it must be Vern" PERKY 2011
Submitted by deadhead on Wed, 10/12/2011 - 6:54am.
This crazy bitch looks so horrendous and manly that I'd have a hard time maintaining an erection long enough to jerk off on her face. In fact, I might even pass up the opportunity to do so.
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Very wrong, but very funny. If I were you, I'd try and maintain that erection (think of Phoebe Price naked) because I wouldn't want to incure her ire. Still, I'd be careful sticking my peen between her butt cheeks. So long, John Thomas.
not the look.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
N A S T Y (isowould) B I T C H !
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011
This crazy bitch looks so horrendous and manly that I'd have a hard time maintaining an erection long enough to jerk off on her face. In fact, I might even pass up the opportunity to do so.
Them's some nasty-ass titty sacks.
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Devil's advocate.
It's OK to want to look like a man, Chaz. What's NOT
O.K. is being FAT. Same ole shit, different day. Being bisexual, for my two cents, I'm not attracted to women with a major case of the Hards. No curves that aren't bolted on and bacon greased within an inch of her life? This isn't Sparta.
" The thing about love is you're always at its mercy"
I feel for her, she's got a personality thats drawn to extremes & the prognosis is never usually good for those types.
She was on the UK celebrity Big Brother a few years back, she came off as the most likeable and sincere, got bullied and ostracised by the rest of the inmates,you could see there was a lifetime theme going on. I think she has to talk up
cause she gets kicked down so often. Team Jodie here.
I am really creeped out by this... she was disgusting before, but his is a whole new creepiness level...... yeeks!!!!
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I guess it's best to end a relationship the same way you start it: absolutely fucking tanked. MK 6/11
I'm a little creeped out that if you take away her implants her upper half and mine are pretty similar proportionally, I'm not 0% body fate, but the arm to chest to waist ratio is about the same...and I'm a dude
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 7:40pm.
Fake boobies suck. I prefer natural bewbs everytime! And if they show the effects of breast feeding and age, then even better. Those are beautiful memories (mammories?) you've built together!
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Team 100% natural!
Jazzy ♥
And where the hell is her waist?
Her legs look amazing! And that's about all I got.
It kind of annoys me that she thinks people would be jealous, I wonder if most of the female bodybuilders think so. I know I should have pitty cuz shes deluded, but I cant. Dear god, do men keep hitting on her??
Her tittays look like swollen pimples that are going to pop on the mirror.
Jodie, if you are reading this (God we hope you are), please stop while now before you turn into a cyborg. You are at the damn cusp, so halt this muscle-headedness before it's too late. You are heading/entering the 'unnatural' zone. Heed now.
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Bugs Bunny 'What's Opera, Doc?"- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C2VMqQ6XnmI (Beginning portion)
Dre,Eminem, Skylar- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VA770wpLX-Q&ob=av3e
I don't really know who the fuck this is, but I seriously doubt this is the work of steroids. A woman can look like this by following a serious weight training regimen and eliminating carbs. Steroids? Nah. Look at the women on those muscle competitions. They look like silverback gorillas.
Sorry to burst the bubble. I'll show myself out.
JAZZY!!!!
Am I too late to say I LUUURRRVVVEEEE YOU!
*team real, nice for mah age bewbs*
You aren't just funny, you is cool!
*chanting as always*
"I feel the burn it must be Vern" PERKY 2011
Her abdomen is a fucking Rorschach test. The cowboy's face, complete with hat and handlebar mustache, that I see there is going to give me nightmares tonight.
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"Men have forgotten this truth," said the fox. "But you must not forget it. You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed."
--"The Little Prince", Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
Hahahahahahahaha!
I'm fine with her wanting to be fit and even muscular, but those boobs look fucking ridiculous.
Fakest tits ever.
This bitch. I get it. New gimmick and all. I'm built! Fuck off, plastic garbage bag tits. I bet she smells like coconut oil and walwrus vagina. ************************************************
The last guy that told me to have patience, I burned him down and bagged his ashes - Cyrus the Virus
@liverwurst:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/07/13/ernestine-shepard-74-year_n_644...
this woman is 74 and still at it. it's GOOD for you.
I bet she looks okay (used very loosely) if she washes the brown greasy shit off her body.
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Douchechill!
Besides the balloon boobs, the fried six-pack appears like a freakish insect thorax.
That is all.
.
.
ick...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Those boobies look like a pair of huge zits that are about to explode. They do not look good.
I like working out, I like toned bodies and all that, but I don't want to look like a man. I wonder what makes these women happily hop onto manly territory. You don't look like that just by working out, you need a "special" diet too, plenty of hours at the gym and sometimes steroids. There is a thin like between looking toned and looking like a female version of Arnold Schwarzenegger and it's sad to see so many chicks crossing that line. But whatever, to each its own.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
They're gonna blow! EVEREHBUDDEH TAKE COVER
Those must be barf bags hanging off her chest. But seriously as body building goes, she isn't bad for an over 40 amateur....she's over 40 right?
i used to body build (many moons ago). she doesn't look roided out .. she seems pretty natural looking and a female can build a little and definitely streamline herself. here are pics of women who are on steroids:
http://www.search-female-physique.com/4images/data/media/75/eurelia_s.jp...
http://legacy-cdn.smosh.com/smosh-pit/4/body-5.jpg
her body looks pretty good, definition in her arms, legs, abs, etc; it's her boobs that are ridiculous.
i know what she means by feeling good about herself and being empowered. however, wanting to get bigger and bigger is when the roids come into play. hopefully she doesn't go that route.
all the being said ... her skull tattoo is not cool (and i love tats) .. and her face ... well that never changed.
Wouldst hit that for a fortnight. (Britished it up for my girl Jodie).
Yeah, she's a freaky pornstar/bodybuilder mutant. Don't care. Sex with her would be like combat. Injuries. And medals for the survivors.
Plus, she has beautiful eyes.
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"...Foster may have cracked under the pressures of being the world's leading Gordon Ramsay-lookalike-sex-dwarf..."
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 7:45pm.
jazzy, that was awesome. xo
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Thanks! Truly how I feel.
Sorry, Jodie. I don't even want my men to look like that. Her weird tittie tumors do make me feel oddly good about my all-natural cleavage that can easily confused with the chest of a 12 year-old boy(not an obese one).
Please remove that disgusting picture from my computer screen. Why are you assaulting my eyeballs with that hideous caterpillar?
She makes me depressed. What could possess a person to do that to themselves? Same for those plastic surgery junkies Megan Fox, Taylor Armstrong, and Pete Burns...that's some profound unhappiness at work.
I have heard that Jocelyn Wildenstein has an absolutely lovely personality though, so there are exceptions.
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I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.
Bitch is so roided out of her mind...makes you feel invincible..too bad she looks like an ugly muscular tranny...my apologies to trannies everywhere.
Submitted by agirl on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 7:35pm.
"I do feel a bit like Superwoman. Now every single person around me is jealous of my body."
That's the cocaine talking.
Honey, when death is literally peeking out from your crotch, it is time to re-evaluate your life choices.
^THIS^
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Imperfection is beauty. Madness is genius and it is better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring. - Marilyn Monroe
jazzy, that was awesome. xo
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No not "baby" anymore....if I need you I'll just use your simple name
Only kisses on the cheek from now on, and in a little while, we'll only have to wave
-Fiona Apple
That just ruined my desire to have a sausage pizza hot pocket.
Team Soft Boobies.
That skull peeking out of her drawers is like, "I have seen hell."
Fake boobies suck. I prefer natural bewbs everytime! And if they show the effects of breast feeding and age, then even better. Those are beautiful memories (mammories?) you've built together!
"I feel proud when I look in the mirror. I still can’t believe it’s my body. Like, when I look at my abs, I’m just like, fucking hell, I love it so much! I’m the prettiest I’ve ever looked."
That's the mental illness talking.
If you’re not in the bodybuilding world it is scary, but to me it’s normal. I think I still look really feminine. It has totally changed my life, doing this. My self-esteem is higher, my confidence is higher, I feel more secure, feel powerful – I almost feel invincible."
That's the testosterone talking (except for the "feminine" part, that's the mental illness again).
"I do feel a bit like Superwoman. Now every single person around me is jealous of my body."
That's the cocaine talking.
Honey, when death is literally peeking out from your crotch, it is time to re-evaluate your life choices.
um, NO. Not at all. You are GROSS.
I am jealous of Aniston's body. Gisele's body. NOT YOURS.
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No not "baby" anymore....if I need you I'll just use your simple name
Only kisses on the cheek from now on, and in a little while, we'll only have to wave
-Fiona Apple
Oh yay and she was a lesbian for like half a year, and before that she had a TV show to find a husband that she already was with, and whom she dumped not long afterwards.
On a more positive note, at least she has not yet pulled a fake pregnancy.
Nigella and Jamie ain't got shit on Titli !
http://titlisbusykitchen.com/