Escandaloso: Beyonce's Bump Magically Folds In Half On TV
Sandra Rose posted these hilarious screen shots from Beyonce's appearance on Sunday Night HD last night and as she sits down for the interview the holy skin cocoon protecting the unborn golden child completely collapses. HAHA. Sandra says that ever since Beyonce pulled the ultimate STUNT QUEEN move by unveiling her bump in dramatic queen fashion at the VMAs, conspiracy theorists have been whispering on the Internet that she's faking it and Basement Baby's afro is the one carrying her baby and will give birth to it in February. I grew up thinking that Dynasty was real life, so I love scandalous shit like this, but let me throw out a few theories as to what's really going on.
1. The unborn golden child is so special that it can only grow in Beyonce's butt.
2. The unborn golden child is so special that Beyonce has to wear a protective pad to keep it safe.
3. This is just marketing for House of Dereon's new line of memory foam bumps.
4. Nicole Kidman wasn't available when Beyonce asked if she could give her private lessons on how a skilled professional wears a pillow baby to perfection.
5. This is completely natural and I have no idea what I'm talking about (as usual) since I've only been pregnant with whoopie pie babies that later became poop babies.
6. Stealyonce strikes again and stole this idea from Desperate Housewives!
And here's the video of Beyonce's bump in motion. Yeah, I didn't know J.R. Ewing became Australian either.
See, something in the amniotic fluid ain't creole! Somebody get MythBusters on the case!
(Thanks to everybody who sent this in)
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Fake pregnancy??? Preposterous!
Beyonce is an ESTABLISHED MINOR STARLET, who is AS EQUALLY FAMOUS as Heidi Montag and Courtney Stodden!!!
Why would MINOR STARLET Beyonce Knowles ever need to fake a pregnancy?
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:25pm.
Pregnancy bellies are kinda cool, until you start waddling like you have a 12 inch dick up your hooha the entire time and have to grow a 70`s bush cause you can`t see your privates anymore for shaving.
AHAHAHAHHAHAAHAAA UBF!! This. Worst part of being pregnant was letting my toenails, legs and coochie go. After 7 months, it was just impossible. *rivals Demi Moore and Madonna*
Okay that is fucking impossible. Your belly is not full of air as any pregnant woman can tell you. W.T.F??? *raises ear and turns head sideways*
IrishFury - thanks for the avi compliment. I also dig yours very much, that's the only epi I ever watched of that wife swapping b.s. on tv and I was like WHOA! and never watched it AGAIN it scared me that much. And I love a good scare, go figure.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 6:41pm.
Submitted by vegaschick on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 6:06pm.
Even the bikini baby bump pics could have been a prosthetic, they can do some crazy stuff with latex nowadays.
Uh oh, get your tinfoil hats ready.
Yeah, because prosthetic pregnancy bellies don't exist and celebrities are always straight-forward and truthful with the public...
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Bitches just love to be hatin' on other bitches behind the safety of their computer as they eat Frito pie and tell themselves "Maybe I'll shave my legs tomorrow".
IrishFury - you're welcome. My 2nd husband (deceased last summer) was Irish. I am Scottish. Glad to help out a fellow Celt. I always stick by my Celt brothers and sisters - my whole thing is F'the Queen =)
Have a nice night.
Also, they're going nuts at Sandra Rose site about this. Funny to read if anyone's bored.
Bey does make a funny face when she sits her arse down finally at the Aussie. I did pause it myself several times on my player. Also, if you play with the pause button, when after she sits down, a makeup lady comes in from below with brushes and shit in her hand and well there's obviously an edit there.
Submitted by vegaschick on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 6:06pm.
Even the bikini baby bump pics could have been a prosthetic, they can do some crazy stuff with latex nowadays.
Uh oh, get your tinfoil hats ready.
whoa. that's fake or the kid is a disc shaped gumby. dammit.
*peddles off in a mint '88 yugo*
Submitted by Slutleena on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:59pm.
Trudat. You don't get nearly as much pregnant-lady attention when the baby is the size of a mini-shrimp and your belly isn't even swollen.
And as evidenced by her swanning around the music awards show with her plump belly on display, she's all about getting attention for this pregnancy. So I expect her to look at LEAST 6 months along from the start.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Thanks lovely laney, found it.
And LOVE your Avi. I'm a huge LB fan!
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Dark-sided!
Im amazed anyone can defend this. "Oh it's the dress folding not her belly" yeah right. I say she is vain, doesn't want to mess up her body so she has a surrogate somewhere.
The giveaway is the look she gives when she realizes what just happened like 'oh my god, did he notice' i.e she looks up all guilty-like .......the worst faker ever!
From the video it looks like Beyonce only wanted to "show off" the bump in the beginning...the camera avoided it once she had a seat.
IrishFury - it's right at the beginning of the video when she greets the interviewer and goes to sit down.
hot damn, it must be exhausting to live out these lies and pr bullshit. not just beyonce, but katie, nicole, every other stunt pregnancy and bearded relationship.
don't these fools ever have a calgon take me away moment and say fuck it? I sure as hell would. but then I'd be a lousy ass celebrity.
Submitted by TOPANGA on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:42pm.
All I'm seeing is a dress that creased before she sat down. Will people PLEASE get off this womans's ovaries already?! I'm not a big Beyonce fan,but why is everyone making such a big deal about this unborn child,like its the second coming of Christ or something? The conspiracies will always be out there..."She got "pregnant" to take attention away from the fact that her album flopped..its an illuminati child of Satan, she has a surrugate because she doesn't want it to have Jay-Z's features...blah,blah,blah" enought already!
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This is a
>>>>>>>>>>>CELEBRITY GOSSIP SITE FFS<<<<<<<<<<<<
at what point in this video do we see this weird belly thing happen? I can't find it...
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by K2 on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:20pm.
I cant open the link to Katie Holmes pregnancy bump - but I just recall her being bloated looking... ankles, legs, etc. I never thought it was fake. Plus she did the engagement , then the pregnancy , then the wedding. Not sure why she would've tried so hard to conceive before her big wedding extravaganza.
As for bumps .. I must say, I did have a perfect one ... w/o the help of a pillow. So it's possible for some of these bitches:)
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My sister's a nurse who was working at the hospital when Katie gave birth and said it definitely happened. I thought she looked pretty pregnant; however, I'm convinced Suri is not issue from the GMD's loins; I think it's his cousin's sperm they used for that. Regarding Nicole Kidman, I'm convinced the first one was a pillow baby. She never looked pregnant to me.
As for Beyonce, she has what I call "baby corn teeth" - her gums look puffy. She definitely looks pregnant to me, but the belly does look weird when she sits down, it looks like it's got some slight padding over it that folded. But I don't know why she'd fake being farther along. Who the fuck knows anything with these Hollywood people? At this point I'd believe they're all giving birth to a ball of wadded-up sweat socks.
Even the bikini baby bump pics could have been a prosthetic, they can do some crazy stuff with latex nowadays.
If any of you saw the video where she sat down the pillow visibly squished and folded in half.
My best friend called bullshit on this pregnancy from day one. She said no way in hell is Beyonce going to turn into a fat ass by carrying a child when she's done everything she can to look like a skinny white girl.
I need to see video footage of her sitting down. Also, woah, never noticed that she has a gummy smile. I guess she's learned to keep her lips close to her teeth most times. In the first minute or so of the clip MK put up you see a looooot of gums.
Submitted by Ms.Fit on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:58pm.
@Heathen, I'm loving your avie. It's like poetry for sarcastic assholes like myself.
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Thank you! I got it from a sarcastic asshole friend's FB wall. I have no idea where she found it, but it really spoke to me. :-) I figured posters here would appreciate it.
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"And 9/11 ain't nothing compared to what's happening on the buffet line at Sizzler." MK
And as far as those beach photos go:
that could have been a fake bump as well.
I was watching Boardwalk Empire last night. One of the characters is pregnant, and got undressed to look at her body/belly. She looked preggers, but the actress was not.
It's amazing what they can do with prosthetics these days.
What no one seems to notice about the beyonce beach belly pics is that she never got in the water. She walked around on land in a belly bearing bikini. Don't people usually wear bathing suits to swim?
But if you're wearing a prosthetic silicone bump, water would be a bad thing.
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An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.
"Beyonce' shared some big news at one of her shows! At her concert in Australia, the songstress announced she and husband Jay-Z will be expecting their new bundle of joy sometime in February. She went on to tell the audience all about her experiences with pregnancy."
That was in the local news today. I would be pissed if I paid to see the bitch sing and all she did was blab on and on about not being able to see her feet and her cravings for pickles with mayonnaise and all that other shit that EVERY OTHER WOMAN GOES THROUGH when they are pregnant.
Submitted by Snow Owl on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:19pm.
Beyonce's skin tone doesn't look lighter to me.
Her skin tone fluctuates like almost everyone else's does - add to that the different lighting at these interviews she does. It's just more interesting for people to accuse her of bleaching her skin/"trying to be white".
Submitted by Dirk Diggler on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:52pm.
I don't understand all those fake-baby-bump shenanigans. I thought most women didn't like the pregnant look?
Whatever.
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That's true for some women. But in Bey's case I think she's accentuating her belly because of the attention she's getting.
Sincerely,
Alana Smithee
Bey is pregnant. The end.
@Heathen, I'm loving your avie. It's like poetry for sarcastic assholes like myself.
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I'm sorry Ma'am, but our meat lovers pizza does not include penis. - Pizza Hut order# 27
That Sandra Rose chick is one fruit loop. Seriously, that bitch is 21 flavors of crazy. And, I don't understand people calling her smart when all she does is copy/paste shit from wiki. Stopped going to that site a looooooooong time ago.
Anyway, there were just pictures of Bey on the beach looking very pregnant. I think she added some padding to make herself look bigger because...well, she is a stunt queen. She isn't far along enough to be showing this much. But, she is still promoting that whack ass cd and stank ass perfume. So, she wanted to appear bigger. Idiot. Also, she strike me as one of those obnoxious pregnant women who tell all her single gf's how they just have to have a baby because w/o one their life will be incomplete. I HAD a gal pal like that. Once that bitch became pregnant, she was insufferable.
*Change is inevitable; progress is optional
*She who conquers herself, conquers all
Submitted by FullMetalJackass on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:45pm.
At first I was calling bullshit on that whole pregnancy after watching the video. Then I looked up the pregnant in a bikini photos. Definitely pregnant. So now I'm gonna say she's wearing padding for dramatic effect.
What you said. In her real pregnancy pictures on the beach her bump is smaller and nowhere near as rounded as the one she showed at that MTV thing. She's definitely pregnant, but bafflingly also padding her real bump.
I don't understand all those fake-baby-bump shenanigans. I thought most women didn't like the pregnant look?
Whatever.
If she wasn't announcing the Feb due date, I would have thought it was extra padding for drama.
I don't buy that she's 5 months along. I'd have thought 2 or 3.
If she's trying to convince anyone that she's 5 months pregnant with an obviously fake bump, then she's probably got a surrogate. If she were carrying the child herself, then she'd have to be an idiot to announce February when she's not far enough along to give birth on that date. Her stans may argue that's proof that she's truly pregnant, but if she were pregnant and 5 months along, she wouldn't need the bump. At 5 months, you don't need help showing that you are pregnant.
There have been lots of rumors that she didn't want to have a baby because she thought that her career would fade like JLo and Xtina when the pregnancy forced her to take a break, but Jz wanted an heir, and was on the verge of leaving her ass because she wouldn't agree to it.
I'm guessing the surrogate allows bey to work through the "pregnancy", maintain her body, continue working immediately after the "pregnancy", AND give her husband an heir. Not to mention getting to use the baby/mother angle for promotion and additional businesses/product lines/ventures.
Mark my words: most women need considerable time off after giving birth, to recover and to get used to the baby who needs round the clock care. Beyonce (by contrast) is going to disappear for 2 weeks to 1 month, then start doing staged photo ops during month 2. By month 3 she'll be right back into working again.
Someone said it was weird that bey announced her pregnancy so publicly when she hid her wedding.
Beyonce didn't hide her wedding. She leaked info about the date so the "secret" wedding was the biggest story of the week. Then bey played it coy for months, denying the wedding and not wearing a wedding band. She started showing off her engagement ring (post wedding) at the same time she started promoting her single "Put a Ring On It"; it became a huge story, and the video/single/album got a lot of press.
Beyonce is the queen of using her personal life for pr while simultaneously insisting that she's a private person.
What shocks me is that so many people believe she is a private person simply because she SAYS so, regardless of how much her behavior belies her comments.
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An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.
dementa - I know right! Something in the milk aint clean!
Submitted by dementa on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:41pm.
.
I'm waiting for her to balloon up. If she is pregnant, she should turn into a blimp anyday now.
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Have you seen her knees? I think she's carrying a twin in each of them.
Submitted by dbella on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:35pm.
Creole does not mean a person of French and Native American descent, but a person of French and Spanish descent. Later the term Louisiana Creole came to mean a person of mixed race whose black ancestors came from the West Indies as opposed to Africa.
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I'm from New Orleans & people down here use the term "French Creole" to distinguish between a Louisiana native of French & Spanish descent and just plain "Creole" to refer to a Louisiana native of mixed race whose black ancestors came from the West Indies.
French Creoles & Creoles have large populations in New Orleans & both groups are very proud about their heritages.
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"And 9/11 ain't nothing compared to what's happening on the buffet line at Sizzler." MK
Pregnancy bellies can get weird looking, but in my experience it's not until the baby is actually well-formed that you see odd shapes. My son was laying sideways in me at one point near the end of my pregnancy and my belly looked lopsided, but it never collapsed at any point like that dress makes her belly look.
I think Katie was knocked up when she met Tom and that just sealed the deal for Tom. Instant family = not gay right?
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:42pm.
Submitted by ponchiks on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:34pm.
Submitted by Spoiled on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:28pm.
Maybe Suri got lost in the intergalactic post?
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:42pm.
Exactly. Plus, there was this one week where Katie just VANISHED, and all these Scienos were spotted carrying big ol' silent-birth signs into the house.
Then a week or two later, Katie reappeared with ZERO BLOAT WHATSOEVER, and a belly that looked like a friggin' basketball.
BTW, I dunno about the bikini belly. The bikini looked really unattractive, and it could have been the cut making her look more Buddhaesque.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by Madam Pince on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:35pm.
Given all the fear she evinced when Basement Baby gave birth -- apparently seeing a baby emerge from a babymaker was too much for the House of Dereon to deal with -- I wouldn't at all be surprised if BB has been called in to carry the Golden Child.
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Seriously that House of Dereon name sounds to close to Derriere- which makes me think of "House of Ass"
At first I was calling bullshit on that whole pregnancy after watching the video. Then I looked up the pregnant in a bikini photos. Definitely pregnant. So now I'm gonna say she's wearing padding for dramatic effect. A wombhancer, if you will. Still ridiculous, but at least it's only sort of bullshitty?
WOMBHANCE!
@dbella
Submitted by dbella on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:35pm.
Creole does not mean a person of French and Native American descent, but a person of French and Spanish descent. Later the term Louisiana Creole came to mean a person of mixed race whose black ancestors came from the West Indies as opposed to Africa.
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Before I go into a history lesson I want to address your comments about what isn't Creole. There are many definitons of what Creole is and the diffinition is different depending on what era and who you ask. As it applies to Beyonce Creole is a person of color i.e. of African decent with French and Native American ancestry. As this also applies with my family. I don't walk around calling myself Creole but I am if I chose to call myself that.
Now to the history lesson that I was trying to avoid. It started off as those of French and Spanish decent. There was a time that it meant anyone of mixed heritage be it a fully European heritage or an African of mixed heritage. Louisiana Creole wasn't started because of West Indian migration they used "creole" before that. Being what West Indians are people of color and if they were mixed they would also be called Creole.
I could go on but this comment is going way over what I'd intended in the beginning.
Sincerely,
Alana Smithee
Submitted by ponchiks on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:34pm.
Submitted by Spoiled on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:28pm.
Agreed, Katie Holmes got knocked up in April 2005 and Suri was actually born in January 2006:
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,160192,00.html
They dragged the pregnancy out to give her a more plausible birthdate.
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Where's the problem with those dates? You are actually pregnant for 40 weeks, which is about 10 months, so if Katie got pregnant in mid to late April then January sounds like a plausible due date to me.
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Holmes and Cruise insist Suri was born in April.
LIE TELLERS!
Is Beyonce pregnant with a Tempur-Pedic mattress??
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Fancy's Big Surprise: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3r5BLdqxig
Fancy's Big Surprise Part 2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PY4we9Iv
All I'm seeing is a dress that creased before she sat down. Will people PLEASE get off this womans's ovaries already?! I'm not a big Beyonce fan,but why is everyone making such a big deal about this unborn child,like its the second coming of Christ or something? The conspiracies will always be out there..."She got "pregnant" to take attention away from the fact that her album flopped..its an illuminati child of Satan, she has a surrugate because she doesn't want it to have Jay-Z's features...blah,blah,blah" enought already!
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
Submitted by snowball on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 4:53pm.
Mainly because Nicole never LOOKED very pregnant even at full term. But honestly I think she was preggers - some tall thin women never look very preggers. I knew a woman who looked about five-months along at full term, and she had the same body type as Nicole.
I suspect that either Beyonce is pregnant but isn't "visible" enough to get attention, or she WAS but had a miscarriage and is now trying to salvage the situation by secretly nabbing a baby while faking the pregnancy.
I'm waiting for her to balloon up. If she is pregnant, she should turn into a blimp anyday now.
Anyone wanna bet that it's another pair of in vitro twins?
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Right M.E.! Seeing as April 2005 to January 2006 makes sense, then why is Suri's supposed "birth" date not until APRIL 2006?!
http://www.tmz.com/2006/07/10/exclusive-suri-cruise-birth-certificate/#....
Either Katie was impregnated by the "Church" on the day she met Tom, or she was already preggers by then.
Submitted by Spoiled on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:10pm.
Katie Holmes looked pregnant? Seriously? Does this bump look real?
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Well, this just made my day! Looks like she's storing a lampshade under her rib cage! :)
My belly totally folded when I was pregnant, all the time. We named our daughter 'Taco'.
Spoiled - yeah, those "Missing" days are her being sent to the COS for auditing.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:33pm.
Submitted by ponchiks on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:27pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 5:22pm.
Getting up afterwards is even more fun.
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Both kids sat on my sciatica, getting up from the sitting position was a bitch most of the time, or I'd be stuck there, frozen. GAH!
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Same here, only I also had that thing when your pelvis begins to come apart ever so slightly, I can't remember what it's called now, but I do remember the pain. The constant pain and being unable to lie down, sit down or walk properly for about 5 months of my life.
Personally, I'd more like to know who signed Molly Meldrum out of the old people's home?
So there you have it, the entire wealth of Australia's (fading) knowledge of the music industry in a cowboy hat, bless him.
I can still remember ! years ago Molly telling Australia via Countdown about "a young lady called Madonna, who was going to take the world by storm" or some shit similar.
I just found this 80's? blooper clip of Molly and Madonna, LOL @ Molly THAT'S NOT FUCKING PROPER!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lx2cTcmC4c0