If Stanley Donen directed an American Apparel commercial starring an Audrey Hepburn impersonator he bought off of Craigslist, it might look like Beyonce’s video for “Countdown.” One second it’s Funny Face, then it’s a Wrigley’s commercial, then it’s an Old Navy commercial, then it’s Bye Bye Birdie, then it’s like a Gap Khakis ad come to life. Basically, this video is homage-ing from every one of its video pores. And Beyonce’s face twitches tell me that her unborn golden child is kicking so damn hard that it’s sending vibrations up her spinal cord to her brain. If that isn’t a baby’s way of saying “have a seat,” then I don’t know what is.
I give this Audreyonce video 3 out of 5 screaming Basement Babies.