And You Saw This Coming....

Yesterday, some hos felt that Johnny Depp's hotness drowned in the stupid streams of shit fuckery that poured out of his unfiltered mouth hole when he said that getting his hair blown out, getting his face covered in make-up and getting a thirty thousand dollar suit strapped to his body for a magazine photo shoot was just like getting RAPED! And yes, Whoopi, he meant rape rape.

This shit nugget out of Johnny's mouth caused some photographer's to slip a condom over their lenses before taking his picture and to also get it in writing that the photo shoot is consensual so he can't press charges against them for sexually violating him with a flash. It also caused RAINN, the country's largest anti-sexual violence organization, to issue a statement saying that they were disappointed with Johnny's comments. So what's a Johnny to do?! Say he's saaaareeeeee, of course. Johnny pushed out this apology to Fox News this morning:

“I am truly sorry for offending anyone in any way. I never meant to. It was a poor choice of words on my part in an effort to explain a feeling. I understand there is no comparison and I am very regretful. In an effort to correct my lack of judgment, please accept my heartfelt apology.”

To be fair, Johnny's Vanity Fair photo shoot was shot by Terry Richardson so there's a good chance he was actually raped. But seriously, everybody should take Johnny's apology even though he felt up his heart to pull it out. But one thing we shouldn't take is the fact that in that cover Johnny looks like a bloated butchie who works part-time as a bar back at a gypsy lesbian bar to pay for his addiction to Internet-bought Botox. No.

Posted by: Michael K

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Johnny Depp

Submitted by Chicklet on Sat, 10/08/2011 - 2:28pm.

He's so rich now in his own self-absorbed ivory tower in the clouds world that he can't relate to the real meaning of words like "rape." I don't care if he did apologize (damage control), I'll never think the same of him again. He sold his talent (?) out for $$$$ to DisneySatan, and now doesn't care about anything except money. He also can't act anymore; he IS Capt. Jack Sparrow - he seems to bring a bit of the pirate character into every new character he plays now. A case of the character overcoming the ego of the actor. Johnny, you suck, and I won't be watching any of your new movies.

Submitted by Daniee on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 5:26pm.

Like many, I also have been a victim of of assault although I do not pay much attention to Johnny as isn't he drunk most of the time??? Drunkies do not even remember what they sy the next day, so I am not gonna begin keeping track of the verbal diarrhea.

Submitted by kikichanelconspiracy on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 5:16pm.

"A stupid and idiotic thing to say for sure, but his apology sounds sincere and like John Mayer and Lars Von Trier, I don't think he's a bad person....just someone who didn't think about what was coming out of his mouth until after the fact.

Unfortunately, like "retard" and "gay," "rape" is another word that is becoming mainstream and losing its potency...I can't tell you how many times I heard "oh man I TOTALLY just got raped by that final exam" in college, and no one bat an eye. I am NOT saying I agree with it or that it's okay, but it's happening nevertheless.:"

While I agree with what you're saying, I think what a lot of people took issue with was his comparing a voluntary, pre-arranged photo-shoot for which he is either directly financially compensated, or indirectly financially compensated (i.e. prompting whatever film he's making) to rape. I can't speak for anyone on this board except for myself, but I do think that people would have given him a bit more leeway if he compared paparazzi to being raped. I think paparazzi-violation analogy is clearer than the 'Oh, my life is so hard, wearing this frippery and having editorial and artistic control over my pre-arranged portrait that will directly benefit me is such a violation' narrative that he was peddling.

I love taking the piss out of someone as much as the next Dlister, but I do think his choice of words were obnoxious and he owed people an explanation. The imagery he conjured was not all reflective of his reality. He did owe it to people to admit that he should have said 'violation' instead of 'rape'. He's 47 (or 48?) years old and has been famous for 25+ years. He's not a neophyte or an ingenue so he knows enough to chose his words carefully during an interview. This is coming from someone who (unfortunately) has to deal with the (sucky) media A LOT for her job. You best believe I am on my motherfuckin' A-game when I'm on the phone with some blowhard who think he's the next Woodward-Bernstein. When in doubt, I just make some generic, evasive comment. And this is coming from someone who has no formal press training and no publicist to hide behind. Fuck him for not knowing better.
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If love had a dick I would eff with it. But it doesn't (it has a no crotch like Barbie).

Submitted by becky n sydney on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 4:42pm.

Submitted by Mrs Patrick Campbell on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:07am.

LOVE her eye-liner !

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Hahaha!! I think Johnny needs his big ol' gob stopped up with a little sumthin' sumthin'. Wanna race me, Mrs PC?
*slips off undies in anticipation*
On ya mark, get set, go!!!

Submitted by Neurotic on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 4:16pm.

Something about Depp has always made me not entirely buy what's being sold here.

The link with TR always makes me weary of a person. No, not the poor noobs that have to expose themselves to him in order to keep a career, but those who are already up there and continue their ties with the pedobearphotographer.

He'll keep on coasting on whatever he's done to enchant people and this will mean nothing. Depp seems to be made out of teflon.

Submitted by Rdeadline on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 4:03pm.

A couple years ago I still would be pissed at his insensitivity after he apologized, now I'm like, "Oh great, now I can watch my legally downloaded copy of Secret Window five million more times."

Submitted by Ms.Fit on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 3:51pm.

Submitted by Commander Willi... on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 3:50pm.

http://pseudoccultmedia.blogspot.com/search?q=terry

Based off this blogspot, I'm starting to get the whole rape thing. Is it me or is there an abundance of Natalie Portman pics in his collection?

~~~~~
I'm sorry Ma'am, but our meat lovers pizza does not include penis. - Pizza Hut order# 27

Submitted by ghost of gene r... on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 3:08pm.

So how sorry would he be if there *wasn't* such an widespread, angry reaction to what he said and his publicist didn't scramble the fighters? My guess is not very, or he wouldn't have said something so fuck-ass stupid and insensitive in the first place.

Submitted by Commander Willi... on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 2:20pm.

"In high school Terry spent five years playing the bass in a punk rock band called 'The Invisible Government', now he has taken photos of the actual invisible government's main representative/puppet, Barack Obama. It should say a lot that Barack Obama appears to be a fan of Terry and had portraits of himself taken by him in 2007 for Vibe magazine, during the run up to the 2008 "election". The below photo I linked to a while back but is worth including properly in a post (remember that Terry Richardson is one of the most well known and well paid photographers in the fashion industry so this speaks volumes), his tattoos probably bare some significance too (like himself as a child tattooed on his chest)."

http://pseudoccultmedia.blogspot.com/search?q=terry

-Commander William T. Riker of the Starship Enterprise

Submitted by Commander Willi... on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 2:15pm.

Submitted by MotherPlunger on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:47pm.

100% agree.

-Commander William T. Riker of the Starship Enterprise

Submitted by Manimal5 on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:31pm.

Maybe if he said like "being sodomized" instead.

Submitted by Whatever on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:28pm.

He is sorry he didn't think before he spoke and people think he is a pampered brat.

Submitted by SANS FARDS on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:25pm.

I never realized his tattoos sucked so much A, though.

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I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.

Submitted by MotherPlunger on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:17pm.

The part about Terry Richardson taking the photos, I agree....he's a Satanic handler. Everyone knows it. And those recent photo shoots with lindsay lohan....he's probably handling her too, but I don't give him credit for that, I think anyone could. (No offense to lohan, ehh not that I care)

---------------------------------------------

"Oh shoes for poor people!" *walks over*

"Yeah, I can't afford these."

Submitted by DDT on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:05pm.

Submitted by saltydog88 on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:24pm.
On another note, am I the only one who is really disappointed in big name stars like Johnny who would allow themselves to be photographed by a scumbag like Terry Richardson? His photos are unremarkable and his reputation is disgusting, somebody like Johnny has the power to say, "no, I would be interested in shooting the cover of you magazine but not with that photographer"
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I agree.

For those curious about Terry Richardson, this link is quite, um, informative. Some of the photos are NSFW, so tread carefully.

http://pseudoccultmedia.blogspot.com/search?q=terry

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WORDS MEAN NOTHING, fashion speaks volumes. -MK

Submitted by Candy on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 11:36am.

Yes, the camera surely raped him in that photo. It's a wonder he kept himself so composed. He's truly one of the greatest actors of our generation. that way he endures it. I just don't understand how he does it.....
蜘龍====================龍蜘

(\__/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")

Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 11:20am.

Submitted by The Mad Catter on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 11:56am.

Yeah, the problem is Johnny Depp is likeable and most people think he is delicious. Had this been Lindsey Lohan, Goopy or some other Dlisted unfavorite..the same people who are telling us to "get over it" would be in here all up in arms. But he gets a pass so we are automatically being "pc".

I am glad he realized it was stupid to say and apologized and now we can all move on.
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You really have to side clap and pucker for a piece who can stand next to a white feather and out-gay it. - MK 8/3/2011

Submitted by patgraham3 on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 11:15am.

Huhhhhhh!!!!! Much ado about nothing!!! I can't remember ever reading a comment by Depp that was offensive in any way, about anything. I'm sorry he even felt the need to apologize at all. But the way things are today, there really is no freedom to speak (not of).

Submitted by Gardening Girl on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 11:09am.

@ saltydog88

Nope. Richardson is what my dear grandmother used to call a shitbird. I don't know why anyone with any one would use him. It would be filthy by association.

Submitted by undinespragg on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 11:09am.

Also: 21 JUMP STREET!

Submitted by Gardening Girl on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 11:06am.

Ahh Johnny...how old are you? Next time think before spouting off. You know people will examine every shit nugget you spout. But I forgive you.

Submitted by undinespragg on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 11:06am.

HYPERBOLE people. Look it up. The very horrible nature of rape is exactly why people use the term "like getting raped." Get over it.

Submitted by saltydog88 on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:54am.

On another note, am I the only one who is really disappointed in big name stars like Johnny who would allow themselves to be photographed by a scumbag like Terry Richardson? His photos are unremarkable and his reputation is disgusting, somebody like Johnny has the power to say, "no, I would be interested in shooting the cover of you magazine but not with that photographer"

Submitted by saltydog88 on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:47am.

I think what Johnny said was stupid on many levels, I also feel bad for any victims of sexual assault. However, he wasn't making a rape joke so some of these reactions are a bit over the top. There is a big difference in making jokes about sexual assault and rape and using the word rape in a moronic analogy.

Submitted by SANS FARDS on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:44am.

A stupid and idiotic thing to say for sure, but his apology sounds sincere and like John Mayer and Lars Von Trier, I don't think he's a bad person....just someone who didn't think about what was coming out of his mouth until after the fact.

_______________________________________________

I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.

Submitted by The Mad Catter on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:26am.

This thread makes me sick on so many levels. I'm not going to detail my personal experiences here, but I AM offended and I have reason to be. I'm offended by Depp's idiocy, and I'm offended that people here would stoop to making rape into a joke to defend themselves and some celeb who could give a shit about them. I like to get along with people here and say crazy shit and laugh but this is too far for me. And no, I'm not just being "sassy" right now. So call me "PC" (pfft) but whatevs. Not loving it.

------------------------------------

19 Cats and Counting!

THE FULL RELEASE LOOP

What the underlying loop inside all of this really is
1974 someone used satellite time and brain cephalics (same thing), to view me, in 19764
The sound of the BR

Submitted by rotten_egg on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:54am.

This is fucking ridiculous. While I agree that some public figures really do need a slap in the face when they vomit stupid offensive shit, this was NOT the case. Some people just need a chill pill and high five in the face for being way too dramatic.

Shame on him for apologizing when he did nothing wrong.

**************
-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.

Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:16am.

Jayhawk I hope I didn't offend you. I hate you went through that. I'm just being sassy about people who analyze EVER SINGLE WORD! It's annoying sometimes, ya know

______________________________________________
"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."

*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-

Submitted by A.cotw on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:12am.

Submitted by jayhawkbitch on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:27am.
You are incredibly brave, and I am sorry that you suffered.

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:11am.

Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:39am.
HOW MANY FUCKING ALTS CAN YOU USE AT ONCE!

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How many personalities did Sybil have? Crazy folk haz many!

Submitted by Andrei on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:09am.

My butt could use a good spanking.

Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:09am.

HOW MANY FUCKING ALTS CAN YOU USE AT ONCE!

Jesus. You need help. Seriously.

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:08am.

Submitted by jayhawkbitch on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:27am.
Sorry for your experience, and I'd never presume to speak for all victims. My experience fucked me up for years. I was fourteen, and not only did he hurt me bad, he also got me pregnant and gave me HPV as a never ending reminder. So by all means, talk shit. Your words don't offend me.

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You don't have to explain yourself to anyone here and fuck those that have anything negative to say to you, since you had the guts to tell a very painful story about your life.

Yeah, people get so offended here over word usage but have no problem talking shit to someone who went through the experience.

A bit hypocritical.

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:07am.

Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:27am.

In my Scottish accent too.
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I do believe you have my attention.....

*looks down, places magazine in lap*
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011

Submitted by 18thCenturyFox on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:01am.

Hmmm I'm bored of talking about rape but if you all think it's being P.C. to be bothered by someone using the term flippantly and without thought then most likely you've got no good explanation for the error. P.C. Needs to be added to the list of terms that are nauseatingly overused. Oftentimes in the context of
"What you are saying made my head hurt to think about so I will just write you off as a pearl clutching Victorian" I'm clearly spending too much time on DListed it's starting to remind me of Free 100 hour AOL disks

" The thing about love is you're always at its mercy"

Submitted by Raul Duke on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:01am.

Submitted by A.cotw on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:21am.
Then where's Raul royalty check? Glad you enjoyed that and NO DICKS FOR YOU!

http://youtu.be/i9WOdnR-Nfs

┌_П┐(•_•)┌П┐__
I'm not a living legend. I'm just a myth.

Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 8:57am.

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:22am.
Did you say that in a sexy whisper of a voice???? DON'T LIE!!!!!!

In my Scottish accent too.

Here, help me lift this couch into the back of my van. My arm's broken, you see...

Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 8:55am.

*motorboats everyone without consent*

BE OFFENDED BITCHES!

______________________________________________
"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."

*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-

Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 8:54am.

Submitted by jayhawkbitch on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:09am.
Oh, and I WAS raped, and while I thought it was a ridiculously stupid statement, I wasn't offended. People need to calm the fuck down already.

I'm happy for you (that you weren't offended, not that you were raped - before someone twists my post around). Honestly, I am and I'm sorry you were raped.

But I'm sure that other people who were raped and aren't as strong as you don't want to be told the calm the fuck down.

Just saying.

Submitted by precociousmagpie on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 8:54am.

Wow. That report abuse button actually works sometimes.

*side-eyes boston61*

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 8:53am.

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:20am.
Cuppy - that Terry Richardson dude... he's a little twisted.
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Twisted is not the word for it!

*hurls*

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 8:52am.

Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:20am.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:47am.
BUT DID HE DONATE ANY MONEY?!!!!!

JACK, LISTEN TO ME AND EVERYTHING WILL BE ALRIGHT
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Did you say that in a sexy whisper of a voice???? DON'T LIE!!!!!!
_____________________________________________
"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011

Submitted by A.cotw on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 8:51am.

Submitted by Raul Duke on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:10am.
If Raul has ever offended you with his comments... well boo hoo too fuckin' bad and
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Quite the contrary, I fucking QUOTED YOU. When my best friend asked me a question or three about the terrible Kardashian women and the men who date,fuck, or marry them, "they've seen more black dick than a urinal at the Apollo Theater" was part of my reply.

Shocked laughter resulted, which is a response I love. Thanks for making me and my best buddy laugh.

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 8:50am.

Cuppy - that Terry Richardson dude... he's a little twisted.
_____________________________________________
"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011

Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 8:50am.

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:47am.
BUT DID HE DONATE ANY MONEY?!!!!!

JACK, LISTEN TO ME AND EVERYTHING WILL BE ALRIGHT

Submitted by 18thCenturyFox on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 8:48am.

I'm so glad one rape victim speaks for us all. Fortunately I'll never be the calm type and yeah I listen to Tori Amos or as all my HS boyfriends called her "Torn Anus". People telling others to calm down can keep their shit to themselves, seeing as how they're not omniscient and don't know what others have been through. On THAT note I wish I had some virtual benzo's to pass out before I glove slap some Dartagnians " glove slap baby glove slap!"

" The thing about love is you're always at its mercy"

Submitted by jayhawkbitch on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 8:57am.

Sorry for your experience, and I'd never presume to speak for all victims. My experience fucked me up for years. I was fourteen, and not only did he hurt me bad, he also got me pregnant and gave me HPV as a never ending reminder. So by all means, talk shit. Your words don't offend me.

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 8:47am.

REPORTED! The lot of you!