Elizabeth Hurley Is Going To Try The Marriage Thing Again
Elizabeth Hurley's marriage to that hot Indian billionaire completely died (like Hugh Grant's boner in Divine Brown's mouth after the police shined a light on his face) last year when the News of the World (RIP!) published pictures of her licking on a tongue belonging to Australian pricket (typo and it stays) player and kitty-faced Shane Warne. Shane was also married at the time, but just like Elizabeth, he said he and his wife had been separated for months. Elizabeth and Shane started face humping the fillers out of each other full-time and ten months later their asses are engaged to be married! Because that mess worked so well the first time. Elizabeth and Shane are now the overseas LeAnn and Eddie! Which is sort of fitting since if I kiss this bong again and squint my eyes, Shane looks like he was cut from the same piece of Falcor's taint as LeAnn.
The Daily Mail says that Shane slipped a sapphire and diamond ring (see below) on Elizabeth's finger at some restaurant in St. Andrews, Scotland last night after the Alfred Dunhill Championship. A source who witnessed Elizabeth and Shane getting pre-pre-divorced said this about the proposal:
"Shane proposed over dinner and it was fairly public, not a private affair.It was a VIP crowd in there this evening. It was residents only, including Dunhill past players. He didn’t get down on one knee, but when it was announced the other guests in the restaurant stood up and applauded. Everyone there was absolutely delighted."
But the guests only applauded to hide the sound of the simultaneous queef they all let out over this news. And I'm sure that simultaneous queef lasted longer than Elizabeth's marriage to Shane will! No. I'm sure this one will stick. You know what they say (they don't say this). A marriage to a hot Indian billionaire never works, but a marriage to a dude that looks like a retired Thundercat who suffers from chronic menopause sweats will last forever!


God, I love MizRo.
I have always thought all the hullabaloo about Hurley's surpassing beauty to be ridiculously overstated. I find the ever-present lines around her mouth decidedly unattractive, and she emanates an undeserved, unbecoming smugness. The only movie I've ever seen her in was the one where she was the devil, and I assume we were all supposed to be taken by the sight of Liz in various red catsuits. . . but all I noticed was how those lines around her mouth deepened every time she delivered one of her pathetically stilted lines.
And yes, her fiancee is EXTRA busted.
Wow, what a flamer!
As disturbing as his face is - and it is plenty disturbing - his sideburns are even more so! Just horrible. I feel sorry for her son. What male role models he has, with Steven Bing for a father no less. Ugh. :P
She's in love with his bank account. He's in love with anything that has two tits and a pulse.
Common sense is so rare now, it's a dam superpower.
His expression is like someone just stuck a thumb up his bum.
Ew ew ew ew EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!! Why does he look like that? That man is repulsive! Why Liz, WHY?????
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"It's always funny until somebody gets hurt-then it's fucking hilarious": The late great Bill Hicks
They make two very lovely brides-to-be. Mazel tov!
well, you know how the saying goes..."if at first you don't succeed...marry a man with roidface"? or something like that.
www.hangryhippo.com: Where hunger, anger, media consumption, and satire meet for a snack
@Manimal - nice avie. Let's Go Yanks!!!
o/t, I've always liked Liz. Hope this one works out (even though it won't).
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I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.
Im still not getting where his white lips come from. Looks like hes putting zinc oxide on them.
If that bastard has one more chemical peel on that thing he calls a face, they're going to be scraping bone.
"Supposedly"?? Really? Who says that??? I think you are wrong. Su-pose-eb-lee. Try it-- it rolls off the tongue much more liltingly and pleasingly to the ear.
Submitted by Goldigga on Sun, 10/02/2011 - 7:57am.
Shane Warne is the worst! An absolute prick. A few years ago, two girls hid a video camera in their room and taped the threesome they had with him. If you want the full run down on his sexual prowess and pics from the sex tape:
http://www.121s.com/default.aspx?g=posts&t=7340&m=
No need to thank me!! ;)
LMFAO!!!!! cannot. breathe. *snort* is he wearing underoos? hahahhahaaha.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Submitted by moonmaid on Sun, 10/02/2011 - 7:55am.
If you click on that Daily Mail article, her young son is absolutely beautiful. Will be a lady killer in a few years I'm sure. Hopefully will not become a jerk like many of the young and monied.
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Luckily for him his mother's genes took over instead of the fathers.
Submitted by Manimal5 on Sun, 10/02/2011 - 10:15am.
Submitted by joe shmoe on Sun, 10/02/2011 - 9:59am.
Haha Joe. I'm really just going by what other people are saying but Rigor Mortis is not a good facial expression
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haha back at ya, Manny. I hear that rigidity is not restricted to his face. Man is a H.O.R.N.D.O.G.
Not that there's anything wrong with that. :D
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Submitted by joe shmoe on Sun, 10/02/2011 - 9:59am.
Haha Joe. I'm really just going by what other people are saying but Rigor Mortis is not a good facial expression!
Submitted by Manimal5 on Sun, 10/02/2011 - 9:40am.
I'll bet there's a lot of towel snapping in the locker room after a game of Cricket
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Hahaha..do you think they hoot when he gets out his Estee Lauder Gentle Oil-Free Eye Make-up Remover?
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Judging from this photo, sounds like this news is the first he's heard of this.
I'll bet there's a lot of towel snapping in the locker room after a game of Cricket.
*crickets*
So her new husband-to-be has earned the title of Least Trusted Man in Australia. Cripes, what a distinction!
http://www.deccanchronicle.com/channels/lifestyle/corporate/shane-warne-...
It looks like he has dyed his thinning hair back to its original brown color instead of the bleached blond, had his eyebrows plucked and probably some chemical peel and resurfacing action to clean up the wrinkles and sun damage. Unfortunately, combined with the weight loss, it just doesn't look good. He should let the eyebrows go back and let his hair be whatever color it is.
And man, does he sound like a prize. She sure knows how to pick em! Wasn't the father of her child that awful playboy jerk Steve whatshisname?
how does anyone with pockmarks as deep as hers ever consider modelling as a career?
Liz is turning into Rita Wilson.
Shane looks kinda gay. I just did a Google Image search of him. He used to be chunkier. Maybe the combo of weight loss and makeup (and whatever else she made him do) is the problem.
Shane Warne is the worst! An absolute prick. A few years ago, two girls hid a video camera in their room and taped the threesome they had with him. If you want the full run down on his sexual prowess and pics from the sex tape:
http://www.121s.com/default.aspx?g=posts&t=7340&m=
No need to thank me!! ;)
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"Your mama is going to make George Clooney happier than anybody ever could!" - MK
If you click on that Daily Mail article, her young son is absolutely beautiful. Will be a lady killer in a few years I'm sure. Hopefully will not become a jerk like many of the young and monied.
this guy is set to tame tigers onstage in vegas.
LOL - Yes, this is not a good look, to say the least!
You know that saying, "He/She cleans up well"? Well these two clean up BAD - I have the feeling both would look hella better if they left the makeup bag alone.
Like many pro athletes, he has no idea how to dress up. Liz should have styled him a little better - no excuse for that.
She has always been a beautiful woman, but now that she is in her 40s she might think of easing up a bit on the eye makeup. I think after a certain age, it just makes you look older and hard. She is still styling herself as if she was 25, and it doesn't work. That said, she is gorgeous and still has a beautiful figure. I remember seeing her in a British TV movie in the mid 90s with the late Edward Woodward (Equalizer) and she was actually good. He was such a good actor I think he brought out the best in her. I think if she had had less celebrity/Hugh Grant/safety pin dress silliness in her life, she might have had a chance to develop into a decent actress.
Submitted by Nanners on Sun, 10/02/2011 - 7:40am.
Dude is suffering from an extreme case of Gay Face.
If they go past 5 years I'll be surprised.
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The weird thing is, that before he hooked up with EH and let her take over his *image*, he was rough and very masculine looking. His mates on his cricket team must think this is a riot! I think he's had a chemical peel or something, in addition to all the other procedures & the make-up etc. (all of which he has denied, natch) He had very sun-damaged skin from being in the Aussie sun all the time, playing cricket. Now it looks waxy.
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Dude is suffering from an extreme case of Gay Face.
If they go past 5 years I'll be surprised.
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What kind of fuckery is this?
why do women insist on marrying men who wear more makeup than they do? i see eyeliner, foundation and lipstick.
this guy is set to tame tigers onstage in vegas.
*peddles off in a mint '88 yugo*
I feel bad for the son, Damian, having this parade of men/pseudo father-figures traipsing through his young life.
Arun Nayer might have been cute but he cheated on Liz like crazy (no surprise, I suppose, since he cheated on his former wife with Liz) and very indiscreetly. Also, he comes from a wealthy family but they gave him little access to the money so Liz ended up basically financially supporting him throughout their marriage. I can see why she dumped him. I cannot understand, however, why she moved on to this guy.
They are both equally disturbing in the face and frankly, I don't get the Hurley "thing".
I really detest her for her lack of talent, her avarice and her continuous run at monied-men.
Shane Warne what in the name of crapola facelifted hell have you done to yourself you pathetic weasel assed cheating addict moron? Cant wait to see the out come of this fiasco.
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
Submitted by Moester on Sun, 10/02/2011 - 6:53am.
There is a difference between Brazilian 'soccer' and plain 'soccer'?
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I was/am drunk when I wrote that.
Shane Warne what in the name of crapola facelifted hell have you done to yourself you pathetic weasel assed cheating addict moron? Cant wait to see the out come of this fiasco.
Submitted by NDNchief on Sun, 10/02/2011 - 4:25am.
Good to know, you are a refutation to what I read. GREAT players ALWAYS get a pass. As a North Amerikkkan, soccer over cricket. LAKERS are 1st then GREEN BAY, then Brazilian soccer. Then soccer is 4th.
There is a difference between Brazilian 'soccer' and plain 'soccer'? Shock horror.
Also, it's FOOTBALL not soccer.
He was never exactly attractive, but that 'Extreme Makeover' style going over he's had is awful. He was just to rough and ready to be able to pull it off (if anyone can actually pull that off).
Is Shane a homosexual?
Discuss.
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
Submitted by AlexDSSF on Sat, 10/01/2011 - 9:08pm.
Shane Warne is one of the greatest players in the history of cricket. He is also one of the biggest players EVER, if you know what I mean. He is known throughout Australia as one of the biggest man-whores alive. I guess that he and Liz are made for each other, then.
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Good to know, you are a refutation to what I read. GREAT players ALWAYS get a pass. As a North Amerikkkan, soccer over cricket. LAKERS are 1st then GREEN BAY, then Brazilian soccer. Then soccer is 4th.
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
Aight DEN ! !
Metta World Peace,
FROM: Da NDN ! ! !
LATER slores.
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
Submitted by bookworm on Sun, 10/02/2011 - 3:55am.
I cannot get my head around this. Shane Warne is one of the biggest, thick as a brick, chauvinistic bogans (white trash, macho bonehead, boofhead, Chav, etc) Australia has ever produced. Liz hurley is a well to do, uppity, pretentious snob. What do they have in common?
Shane even joked about Liz (before the big romance) being too long in the tooth for him. He said this on one of the 'footy' (football) TV shows here in Oz. He and the rest of the male panelists laughed their butts of.
• report abuse
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You used a lot of Oz slang. But, I gathered SW is to be avoided.
I only support Brazilian football. And in Amurrica, I support Green Bay Football A la American. LAKERS FO LIFE ! ! !
I cannot get my head around this. Shane Warne is one of the biggest, thick as a brick, chauvinistic bogans (white trash, macho bonehead, boofhead, Chav, etc) Australia has ever produced. Liz hurley is a well to do, uppity, pretentious snob. What do they have in common?
Shane even joked about Liz (before the big romance) being too long in the tooth for him. He said this on one of the 'footy' (football) TV shows here in Oz. He and the rest of the male panelists laughed their butts of.
She's a notorious attention whore. He's a serial cheater. Match made in heaven.
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Wyle E
"understand that a slow red panda who nibbles pickles and does somersaults in the middle of a dancefloor is entertaining to a 7-year-old... " MK.
I think she still looks sexy and confident as hell, but well, he does not even resemble a flesh wearing human to be honest.
Probably a pre-pre-divorce. ha!
WTF is that?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2044174/American-Pie-star-J...
Or maybe the Viagra just kicked in.
He looks like he did an at home chemical peel.
This guy looks like he takes bathes in Oil of Olay...this is not going to last long. When she gets tired of wearing a mirror over her face so he can see himself when they have sex she'll dump him.
Liz has some kind of owl print dress going on. Hoot Hoot!
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Don't think I could marry a guy who spends more time at the salon than I do.
He looks waxed, buffed, exfoliated and tweezed to within an inch of his Thundercat life.
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Submitted by Zonko on Sun, 10/02/2011 - 12:14am.
The white lips are just zinc cream - we have the highest rate of skin cancer in the world.
He could possibly be the DOPIEST looking guy i've ever seen.
If you need some laughs, Google that fuck's name -you won't be disappointed. White lips, stupid look on his face, double chin, fat face - that fuck's got it all.