A Waste Of Bologna!
Page Six says that Justin Theroux's BMW motorcycle has been parked in front of Jennifer Aniston's West Village apartment all week and some shady trick decided to send him a little message by showering his bike with what Aniston should've made for doing The Bounty Hunter: a bunch of cold bologna slices! Filling my head right now are scenes of Jennifer Aniston putting on a serious face to seriously tell a package of Oscar Mayer bologna that what it did to her was really uncool.
One of Jennifer's neighbors tells Page Six that while they were walking their dog early yesterday morning, they found a bologna bukkake scene playing all over Justin's bike. They said bologna was on the seat, the muffler, the engine, the everywhere! The neighbor is a regular Detective La Toya, because they said this about one of Justin's enemies losing their lunch all over bike, “I got the impression it was some weird message, like, ‘You’re full of bologna. The bike was in otherwise in fine condition.”
Maddox wouldn't touch a piece of gross bologna with Jennifer Aniston's hooves, so you can quickly pull his name out of the suspect pile! Maddox only eats Beanie Baby meat and Cabbage Patch legs. But who ever this is should be punished to the maximum extent of the cold cut laws. Not because they fucked with Justin's bike. Who cares about that bitch. They deserve punishment for wasting bologna IN THIS ECONOMY. That bologna could've been doing more important things like slapping a stripper's ass.
But we really shouldn't believe this shit until Terry Richardson posts pictures he took of Jennifer Aniston and bologna to show us that she's happy and she's okay with bologna even though it did her wrong.
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It looks like he's inching back toward "Mulholland Drive" levels of attractiveness.
I am kind of concerned, though, that, like other posters have mentioned, he might just be using her.
I can picture Angie trying to make fun of Brad for marrying Jennifer. I can also picture Angie bad mouthing Jennifer to Brad. Bc/ Brad is somewhat brainless and cannot think for himself start to believe what Angie says. Then repeat it to the media. I don't think Brad & Angie are as happy as they "pretend" to be for the media. I think he is stuck bc/ of all those kids. I think Brad is maybe envious of Jennifer bc/ she is not stuck.
Submitted by boston61 on Sat, 10/01/2011 - 10:33am.
Jennifer has far too much class to have a baby without a husband. That is for trailer park trash girls.
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You gotta love the literacy and forward thinking of some people here. Not backwarded at all. Also some ppl fuck without being married, now whats up with that!?!?
Jennifer has far too much class to have a baby without a husband. That is for trailer park trash girls.
Jennifer just needs a non hollywood type of guy. This guy is bad news.
Submitted by Fakery and Lies Inc. on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 3:01pm.
It looks like MK is outing himself lately as a diehard full-fledged Brangieloonie. Michael is not even trying to hide in his closet anymore :). His JA snark is not snark any longer; it's gotten more and more vicious without being in the least funny (an important ingredient in true "snark" IMO). Feels almost as if he's trying to draw loons and make DListed into a loon love site. He's certainly not "reading" his posters here as most are not AJ/BP fans for sure - and either JA neutral or fans or don't care one way or another.
While at the same time his "St Angie" and Brad snark doesn't qualify for true snark any longer either and has crossed over into loonie territory, it consistantly plays on the same overdone and boring themes without ever doing any type of snark damage, and it's more almost admiring.
Either Michael has a loonie on his payroll as a writer or he's become a loonie himself. In either case, these threads (like this one as an example) don't draw big #s and aren't funny so don't get their purpose. Feels like someone grasping at straws to put down one side to try to raise the other in comparison. Or just running out of snark
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Well, I learned more than I'll ever need to know about processed meats.
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But I am confused with the scarf and long coat.. although last night would've been a perfect night for it. It's getting chilllly !
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And there I was thinking, that you dare to criticize your God...only to realise it was actually a masked attempt to explain why the fuck they are wearing winter clothing when New Yorkers say its still hot.
S.A.D
The belt and the tight pants are normally the FIRST thing to go when pregnant. Even when only a few weeks preggo - you feel bloated and it's uncomfortable. I dont think she's pregnant. Did anyone see that tight black vest/pants suit she was wearing to the Lifetime Red Carpet event? She still looks firm and flat (great).
But I am confused with the scarf and long coat.. although last night would've been a perfect night for it. It's getting chilllly !
big bags and baggy sweater clothes=possibly maybe preggers to me
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"PLEASE...*gasping for air*....ADMINISTER HATE, STAT..." - Submitted by Tigerlilly on Sun, 09/18/2011 - 5:31pm.
Wait. What's that thing hanging out of his crotch?
Can Maniston be any more desperate for a man? Can Brangelina be any more desperate to prove they are a happy couple?
Are there pictures of him with his natural eyebrows anywhere?
I want her bag so damn badly! Every picture I see of her is with that damn bag. Look now she's clearly holding the bag up to the camera to tease me.
He looks like he uses an eyebrow stencil.
He looks good in the main pic. Her outfit is hideous.
I'll never understand why so few famous people date "regular" people.
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Time cast a spell on you but
You won't forget me
I know I could have loved you but
You would not let me
-Fleetwood Mac
Submitted by Allessandra on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 7:37pm.
Submitted by AttentionWhore on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 6:56pm
He is clearly trying to ride JenAn's coattails to a higher level of celeb mediocrity
I totally agree. He changed his entire look when he started getting photographed with her. I'm afraid she is being used. She is the new Demi Moore.
So funny. The two of them walk around with a our sh*t don't stink attitude they got what the deserve.
Can't Jennifer Anniston date some guy that is more like her ? These fake boyfriends seem pathetic...Being alone is better than this...
I think that perhaps the oddest thing about this guy is that he wants to be all cool DC hardcore scene from 25 years ago, yet he has a horrible orange XTina tan. Very weird.
Submitted by AttentionWhore on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 6:56pm
He is clearly trying to ride JenAn's coattails to a higher level of celeb mediocrity
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bwahahahaha, that´s funny.
Also, where was this photo taken? A coat and big scarf? It's been a little cool at night in NYC. But not COAT weather, FFS. And a leather jacket with a hoodie underneath? Maybe a sweater...
I like her big ugly purse, though.
Ugh! This guy and his goth-emo-hipster-wannabe outfits! He is clearly trying to ride JenAn's coattails to a higher level of celeb mediocrity. I liked him best as the stuttering cowboy in Romy and Michele's High School Reunion.
Are we talking about mortadella?
*confused*
*again*
@Allessandra, that's funny, but I'm not sure I believe that this dude wanted to hump on AngieJo.
Also, though I'm on the fence with him, I do hope he beat his addictions or whatever.
@IHateCharityChic: The Polanski shit really is annoying, because there's all these people, who presumably are against pedophilia, supporting him and it's difficult to understand what are their motivations in condoning this.
When someone associates themselves with this kind of people or even just endorses their work, it's hard to look past their ability to excuse the inexcusable just because the perpetrator happens to work and hang around the same circles as they do, or are presumably talented and good at what they do.
Snowy, the bologna with the green things is called pimento loaf. That's so e gross shit! It looks like it has rotten eyeballs!
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take that stupid fucking hat off ya big douche!
I really can't with this guy
Justin denies the story and says he's going to sue.
This is getting good....
Oh, and the dude who's spreading the stories is a friend of Brad Pitt, and worked in Moneyball with him.
Does she have a new film out soon? You'd think so with all the exposure.
The friendship with the pedo photographer really makes me question her character though. Before that, she was just kinda there, but this famewhoring with this dude and photos taken by that asshole are really far too much.
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If Terry Richardson is good enough for Obama and Paul McCartney, he's good enough for Jen.
http://www.terrysdiary.com/post/7300583630/me-and-sir-paul-mccartney-at-...
http://slamxhype.com/art-design/barack-obama-x-terry-richardson-photogra...
Also, Johnny Depp signed the petition to Free Roman Polanski, a guy who raped a 13 year old girl.
Brad is friends with Wyclef, a man who stole from his own charity before faking a gunshot wound and lying to police about it.
Why don't you direct your outrage where it belongs?
Submitted by Neurotic on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 4:29pm
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Ha, so I am not the only 1 who thinks like that on here.
Apparently Justin was a drug addict and used to fancy Angelina..hmmm. If thats true, then OUCH!!
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2043778/Justin-Therouxs-fri...
The bologna is supposed to do is cook in the sun, and when you go to peel it off, it takes the paint off with it. I have no idea if it works.
ETA: I should have known one of you horz knew about this. M.E. is a hood rat, too? *high fives M.E.*
Another day, another Rachel story!
Does she have a new film out soon? You'd think so with all the exposure.
The friendship with the pedo photographer really makes me question her character though. Before that, she was just kinda there, but this famewhoring with this dude and photos taken by that asshole are really far too much.
Submitted by K2 on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 4:05pm.
My grandmother tried that liver shit with me once. I refused to eat it. She told me I couldn't leave the dinner table until my plate was clean.
I think I sat there until at least midnight when my mom finally got home from her date.
I was 7. FUCK YOU GRANNY! I AINT EATING LIVER
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LOL. Well, hopefully she didnt get all "Mommie Dearest" on you and serve the unfinished portion for breakfast !
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She tried, but my mom fixed the situation. I got my puffed rice cereal with honey instead.
My grandmother tried that liver shit with me once. I refused to eat it. She told me I couldn't leave the dinner table until my plate was clean.
I think I sat there until at least midnight when my mom finally got home from her date.
I was 7. FUCK YOU GRANNY! I AINT EATING LIVER
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LOL. Well, hopefully she didnt get all "Mommie Dearest" on you and serve the unfinished portion for breakfast !
Submitted by K2 on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 1:47pm.
My mom used to cook those huge slabs of liver twice a month, and always tell me "It's rich in iron" while I choked on it. GROSS
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My mother pulled that liver shit on us kids too! Fuckin' NASTYYYYY! She would turn her back and we would throw it on the floor for the dog to eat -- sonofabitch would scoff at it and take off running. I'd have to pinch my nose just to chew without gagging.
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My grandmother tried that liver shit with me once. I refused to eat it. She told me I couldn't leave the dinner table until my plate was clean.
I think I sat there until at least midnight when my mom finally got home from her date.
I was 7. FUCK YOU GRANNY! I AINT EATING LIVER!
Submitted by RustyHooligan on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 3:45pm.
Bologna is the name of the town; baloney the lunchmeat or exclamation. I'm sure it's derived from an American phonetic rendering of the town name (which is properly pronounced more like lasagna).
How 'bout calzone? Two or three syllables?
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Exactly, it comes from the Italian Town. In Italy that cold cut (is it right? It doesn't sound right) is called mortadella and it's made of pork meat and fat.
As for the "calzone" word it's three syllables. It is pronounced like this "cal-zoh-neh". The "A" in cal doesn't sound like in the word "call", but it's more like an "ah", same for the "E", it's not like in "need" but like the first "e" in the word "energy".
Edited to read:
Bologna is the name of the town and the spelling of the meat (though the meat is pronounced "baloney"); baloney the exclamation. The town name is properly pronounced more like lasagna.
How 'bout calzone? Two or three syllables?
I would have selected lean corned beef myself.
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"Going to Burger King to eat healthy is like going to a prostitute for a hug." Dlister Supah 8.20.11
The best deli meat is obviously prosciutto (or as my Jersey peeps would say, pro-zhoot). Bologna is icky.
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I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.
Guys, I know that some foreign words become of common usage and get pronounced in the way English speaking people pronounce words, but Dear Gods, it is not "bologney" nor "balooney", it's NOT pronounced like this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tMQurN6wllE
But it's pronounced like this
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/6d/It-Bologna.ogg
But I know that if you go to your local mart and ask for a piece of bologna in that way, with that accent, they wouldn't understand a thing.
Fakery and Lies,
I agree, but I don't know if MK is becoming a looney or more likely if he's simply annoyed by those people and can't write a funny, snarky piece about all of them anymore.
Leave it to a loon... Their class of lunch meats has never been at a quality level! Baloney?
Submitted by Zorba-the-Geek on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 3:15pm.
That's funky. I thought lye was poisonous.
I'd also be too scared to eat a century egg, though I'm curious:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Century_egg
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....the fuck?
Weird.
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I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.
Submitted by louise_brooks on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 12:56pm.
I disagree. I think balut may be the nastiest thing on Earth.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Balut_%28egg%29
With lutafisk coming in a close second.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lutafisk
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That's funky. I thought lye was poisonous.
I'd also be too scared to eat a century egg, though I'm curious:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Century_egg
Submitted by Fakery and Lies Inc. on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 3:01pm.
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Nawwwwwwwww. I do wonder wether MK reads the comments, I would like it if he would comment himself every now n then.
Dude, calm down. Anytime bologna is thrown, MK is there!
It looks like MK is outing himself lately as a diehard full-fledged Brangieloonie. Michael is not even trying to hide in his closet anymore :). His JA snark is not snark any longer; it's gotten more and more vicious without being in the least funny (an important ingredient in true "snark" IMO). Feels almost as if he's trying to draw loons and make DListed into a loon love site. He's certainly not "reading" his posters here as most are not AJ/BP fans for sure - and either JA neutral or fans or don't care one way or another.
While at the same time his "St Angie" and Brad snark doesn't qualify for true snark any longer either and has crossed over into loonie territory, it consistantly plays on the same overdone and boring themes without ever doing any type of snark damage, and it's more almost admiring.
Either Michael has a loonie on his payroll as a writer or he's become a loonie himself. In either case, these threads (like this one as an example) don't draw big #s and aren't funny so don't get their purpose. Feels like someone grasping at straws to put down one side to try to raise the other in comparison. Or just running out of snark.
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The folks who know the truth aren't talking…. The ones who don't have a clue, you can't shut them up! --Tom Waits
Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth. --Thoreau
I remember hearing before that if you put balogna on a car and it sits in the sun it can fuck up the paint job and leave polka dots....never tried it to be sure but it was a prank I remember from growing up.
Sorry, I don't believe this story. Someone would have gotten a picture of it. And someone would have definitely gotten a picture of them leaving the house to walk the dog. There are paps, dozens of people and now big apple tour buses sitting outside their apartment building 24/7. Plus, it's the Rupert Murdoch owned New York Post peddling this story and they've been trashing Justin since he started dating Jen.
LOL at the nosy effing neighbor "translating" the baloney "message".
My mom used to cook those huge slabs of liver twice a month, and always tell me "It's rich in iron" while I choked on it. GROSS
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My mother pulled that liver shit on us kids too! Fuckin' NASTYYYYY! She would turn her back and we would throw it on the floor for the dog to eat -- sonofabitch would scoff at it and take off running. I'd have to pinch my nose just to chew without gagging.