By the looks of that picture, Scott Disick must be a grower (with the help of a Brooks Brothers penis pump, a peen extender, three layers of dick padding and an injection of Khloe Hormones) and not a shower. Scott Disick (as always, the “s” is silent) is a big walking penis with a side urethra that spits out verbal piss on the regular, but the Kardashian Klan is also trying to make us believe that deep in his Ralph Lauren trousers is a monster that can beat Khloe Kardashian in an arm wrestling competition for the last large pizza on the eatin’ table.
xoJane.com (via UsWeekly) brought up the dick size situation of the newest Kardashian prisoner and Pimp Mama Kris’ whores quickly changed the focus and instead talked about how Scott Disick’s dick is the most useful thing in the family since it can catch peanuts and juggle apples.
Jane: We’re getting the hook — they’re telling us we’re out of time! Okay, wait — is Kris [Humpries] well endowed? They all think he is.
Kourtney: I would think he is.
Kim: (decidedly not feeling us) I don’t really like questions like that.
Khloe: We got all of the preview of Scott at his parents’.
Kim: Even today. Honestly, it’s way too much. He has to start wearing some tighty-whities.
Khloe: He was wearing pajama pants and no undies and you could see it all.
Kim: So inappropriate.
Kourtney: It’s like an elephant’s trunk.
Kim: You guys!
Khloe: He kept going, “I’m trying to compete with Lamar” and I was like “Oh, stop it, you two.”
Kourtney: I just got a Google alert, because Scott and I just had our date night.
Kim: You have your own Google alerts? We have that on record: Kourtney has her own Google alerts and checks them.
Kourtney: We went on a date night in the Meatpacking last night, so the story said, “The Meatpacking District isn’t the only thing packing meat!” Scott was wearing a suit with no underwear last night, so you could see, like, something.
Kim: What?! Like, that’s NOT normal. We have got to by him some underwear for his birthday or something. This is freaking me out.
Kourtney: He never has any!
Kourtney is about the size of a Snooki, so any dick would look Khloe-sized next to her. That settles that. But why is Kim giggling at the mention of the word p-e-n-i-s. Ho, please. I hate it when whores don’t remember where they came from. Kim needs to stop acting like if Scott dropped chocolate sauce on his crotch, she wouldn’t snap for a camera crew and command her pussy to assume the lock jaw position.