Clarification Alert: Only L.A. Gays Are Total Sluts
Patti Stanger, The Millionaire Matchmaker who has a success rate of zero, set b-holes on fire and earned a temporary place on GLAAD's hit list on Sunday night when she opened up her dumb dumpster box of a mouth and said that gays can't stick with one peen, all Jewish men lie and nobody wants to roll around with a queen.
This was not breaking news to those who know that Patti has been terrorizing the straight people and curly-haired communities for years with the ridiculous Tsunami of wet shit that pours off of her rat tongue all the time. But after some called for Patti to be thrown into Bravo's trash pile with Showdog Mom & Dads (Never 4Get), Patti quickly Twatted out an "I'm Sowwy" note. Patti then brought her guinea pig in a wig-looking ass to Joy Behar's show and clarified that she wasn't talking about ALL GAYS, she was only talking about L.A. gays! Patti dipped the generalizations she made on Watch What Happens Live in concrete when she said this to Joy Behar (as transcribed by Towleroad):
"In the show when we do the mixers, the guys are passing around the telephone numbers, they're sleeping with each other, even affter the millionaire gets the date he's sleeping with the pool of people. My (gay) friend...says 'Patti this is what it's like around the country.' This is the gay community. I said, 'I'm trying to curb them.' Now this is not the lesbian. The lesbian gets involved. They move in together. They're quiet. They're at peace. But the gay men. They whip it out at eyelock. They get involved, and then they find out later whether or not they want a serious relationship. And I hope they use the privilege in New York of gay marriage, because now they have it. And a lot of gays aren't getting married, even though they have the privilege."
Patti then said that she's like the Norma Rae of gay marriage and has been an advocate since the beginning of gay time. Patti's right. She once took a break from her busy schedule of yelling at The Hot Topic Twins to pose in a Lee Press-On campaign sponsored by NOH8.
But we're all missing the bigger point here: who in the hell takes Patti Stanger seriously? The only reason why I watched The Millionaire Matchmaker is because I love love love how wrong she is about everything. There should be a disclaimer at the beginning that reads: Whatever Patti Says To Do, Do The Opposite.
How can you seriously take the advice of a mutated ostrich egg who tells you to keep your chonies on during the first date? That makes no sense. If I don't fuck a trick on the first date, how do I know if I want to fuck them on the second date? Answer that, Patti!
And as a gay whose best slut moments were lived out in the L.A. area, I have no comment on her "all L.A. gays are sluts" comment.
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Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Tue, 09/27/2011 - 10:51am.
I for one am sick and tired of the "dating scene". It seems everyone is just out to have sex with someone... meaningless, soul less, mind blowing, pure D raw sex... and want nothing in return. It's horrible.
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You rang?
Jack you know I always ask for something in return.
*gives Jacko a cuddle afterwards anyway*
MK it makes me sad when you say your best slut moments were in L.A.
Your best slut moments are ahead of you, in New York CITY!!!!
MWAH!
@ Sweetas and jack-n-the-hat: You two are murderers on this thread! I am seriously dead.
@ boston61: You are almost as funny. Unfortch, you're not actually trying to amuse, so that makes you an ultra-failure. In case you're confused as to what I'm saying: You suck. Die. Please. (I asked nicely, so it's the least you could do. . .)
For the record: I do believe that since gay men are men, they love sex and do not have to deal with the sexual hang-ups that society has instilled in women. So yeah, they love to fuck and will do so when inclined. I've always said I'm a gay man in a woman's body. Many people don't understand that, but I think D-lister likely do.
Someone should pour her a big ass bowl of Kellogg's Shut-The-Fuck-Up O's
Men are horny, big news. Call the pope. Doesn't mean they don't know how to love someone and be true to them.
There are tons of gay men who are low key and classy and not promiscuous. They certainly would not be talking to sleazy Patti. Many call themselves bisexual. Bisexual is the new codeword for gay men who hate gay acting men.
I just saw her on Joy Behar and she was totally not sorry and spouting more slanderous stereotypes. If she know so damn much why is she alone?????????
Meh. I said it in the other post, but this is a cultural problem and not a "gay" problem, per say.
Gay culture has been molded (and is still being molded) by the view of young, vibrant, muscled, and rich. We are supposed to be young forever. Growing old together was never reinforced, even in the time of sexual liberation.
Now we're left with a media and a culture that tells us to get what we want when we want. The message to everyone (not just gays, but it is pushed extra hard) is to do what makes you feel good and to "stay young."
Well fuck, you can't stay young forever, and sometimes doing what you feel good isn't good for you!
Maybe if we took accountability of ourselves a little bit more we wouldn't be such a hot mess. I mean, we have problems with credit, with sexual activity (diseases & pregnancies), divorce, etc. People have been riding the train off the rails for years now... it's no wonder my generation is a bunch of vain, hyperactive sluts!
Yes, I realize I sound like a codger... but I have seen my far share of slut-days, and I'm only 23!
Sooo...following Patti's tenuous thread of logic; straights have rights but gays are allowed privileges, Melissa Etheridge didn't really have a box of dicks on her kitchen counter because that would have been too flamboyant for a lezzo, and only men in frocks transmit HIV/AIDS?!!?
Patti, the only gay man you speak for is yourself, honey.
Submitted by boston61 on Tue, 09/27/2011 - 11:37am.
The truth is if you are really in love with someone just holding their hand is a thrill. Just being near them makes you happy.
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The truth is that just reading that made me want to vomit. (I'm emotionally dead inside and disgusted by all sentimentality.)
"The lesbian gets involved. They move in together. They're quiet. They're at peace."
This person obviously does not know a lot of lesbians. The moving in part is right, but that is all. There is no "peace"! There is only dyke drama and lesbian bed death. (Which leads to me getting phone calls at 3AM about how my friend is not getting any from her gf.)
She's kind of saying what gay men talk about amongst themselves. Except that there are lots of gay men complaining about that, so obviously some of them do want monogamous relationships, they're just harder to come by.
Agree with fucking on the first date- I fucked my bf on our first "date" aka drunk hook up at a bar ( we knew some mutual people but I probably would have anyway - I WAS DRUNK) We have been together 2 years and live together - we both agreed our drunk judgement on love is much better than sober love judgement - I still remember that first night ( not all of it but most of it) and it's still exciting. AND I'M HETERO - so that blows that theory ( no pun intended. Don't worry ladies I DIDNT BLOW him on the first date - Just straight fuck. <3 U!
Kissing Ass and Cupping Balls. You're Welcome.
MK U made my day again you!! El Fuego. (I'm sorry I only speak Spanglish and I don't know if that makes sense but in my head I's say "He is ON FIRE today" and I just want to say it in SPANISH- It sounds
I Love u love Dlisters and Hot Sluts Everywhere Rok!
Kissing Ass and Cupping Balls. You're Welcome.
FAGGOT FAGGOT FAGGOT
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
This woman is speaking the truth. The only gays who aren't whores are the ones in a coma or too unattractive to get laid. Don't shoot the messenger folks.
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"They tell me you are what you eat, but I don’t remember eating a bad-ass motherfucker"
btw, that strange couple with all the tats and pink bangs...and mohawks are judging the attractiveness and appeal of the women and men...that is a red flag right there...it is like being a purebred at a dog show being judged by mangy mutts...no offense to my mangy mutts...and the purebreds that is the only analogy I could think of at the time.
I really used to think that no sex before monogamy, but always ended up hurt, I have been hurt whether I put out or not, I guess I just got lucky FINALLY, in the love game. Btw, it took four decades to get lucky...actually over four decades...but I think time takes care of all of that confusion and barriers...cause some people I could not stomach having sex with the first date, and some I could not wait to...does this make me a slut...then I am right at home here!
"The only reason why I watched The Millionaire Matchmaker is because I love love love how wrong she is about everything. There should be a disclaimer at the beginning that reads: Whatever Patti Says To Do, Do The Opposite.
How can you seriously take the advice of a mutated ostrich egg who tells you to keep your chonies on during the first date? That makes no sense. If I don't fuck a trick on the first date, how do I know if I want to fuck them on the second date? Answer that, Patti!"...brilliantly put MK!! You are spot on the money on that one!
Fuck Patty and her fantastic plastic personality, brain and face...fucking bitch should be endorsing sites like badplasticsurgery.com. She is a born endorser for that...I asked my husband once if I didn't fuck him on her first date would he have stuck around...and he said of course not..and we have been together 7 + years...some people think that waiting stuff works, but in reality that is not true for the most part. YOu need to know the good before you can really sample the buffet...and by that I mean...if you date someone, love their looks, brain, personality the whole package, but do not click in bed, sorry, it won't work.You have wasted a ton of time and money to find out something you could have found out in less than 24 hours. Sounds shallow, we fuck it, I am happily involved now for 7 years and still fuck like a teenager so there!
Submitted by fishsticksfan on Tue, 09/27/2011 - 1:20pm.
Submitted by boston61 on Tue, 09/27/2011 - 11:39am.
If thinking being a single mother is a very bad thing then I am judgemental.
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Yo mama so hairy you almost died of rugburn at birth.
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This one has me on the floor.... HAHAHAHAHAA
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011
Submitted by boston61 on Tue, 09/27/2011 - 11:39am.
If thinking being a single mother is a very bad thing then I am judgemental.
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Yo mama so hairy you almost died of rugburn at birth.
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like sands through the hourglass....
lololol Yo mama so old I told her to act her age and she died.
Re: Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Tue, 09/27/2011 - 10:31am.
My ex-husband was a one-night stand too. I would always discourage my kids from sleeping around regardless of the choices I made. The kids were the only good thing to come out of that hell on earth 7 years.
Uncle, I am very happy to hear that it worked out in your case though.
Sex makes you confuse addiction to the other person's hormones/pheromones/whatever as love and that it where Patti is coming from.
Love makes you not think straight, and not thinking straight lets you marry the worst kind of man while overlooking the obvious red flags.
I agree completely.
Sex is one thing, a real relationship is totally another.
Best to have the relationship first if a life together is the ultimate goal.
Showdog Mom & Dads ... best show ever. I still mourn its demise :(
Clarification: All gays who want to be set up with a dude simply because he is rich are sluts, and all rich men who want to be setup with gold diggers are sluts.
I live in LA, I'm gay and monogamous. Of course if you go looking for men at The Abbey or Grindr you're not going to find monogamy, but I went on a dating site and the second dude I met on there and I have been exclusive for months.
Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."
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like sands through the hourglass....
yo mama's so ugly I took her to a dog show and she won
yo mama so ugly she entered an ugly contest and they said sorry, no professionals
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“I think that marijuana should not only be legal, I think it should be a cottage industry.” -Stephen King
yo mama so poor i saw her kickin a can down the street and when i asked her what she was doing she said moving
yo mama so poor i saw her at the store buying garbage bags and when i asked her what she was doin she said buying luggage
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“I think that marijuana should not only be legal, I think it should be a cottage industry.” -Stephen King
Submitted by boston61 on Tue, 09/27/2011 - 11:39am.
If thinking being a single mother is a very bad thing then I am judgemental.
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Yo mama so stupid she tried to alphabetise a bag of M&M's.
"Only L.A. Gays Are Total Sluts"
Damn this bitch for not aknowledging the total & utter slutness of dlisted's finest.
Lollollol @ Yo Mama jokes
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Who are you calling silly cow?
All I've got to add is...
Yo mama's teeth so yellow, when she smiles all the cars slow down!
Marcus Bachmann's gonna have a hissy fit!
ditquoi ewwwwww lolololo
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like sands through the hourglass....
yo mama's so broke I asked her what's for dinner, and she put her foot up on the table and said "corn"
This from a woman whose business is arranging for women to have relationships with men who have money. AnySydneyBiddleBarrows, isn't she a bedazzled brandy snifter away from being a pimp?
LMMFAOOOOOOOO at the lovely ISprainedMyUvula...
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011
Submitted by boston61 on Tue, 09/27/2011 - 11:39am.
If thinking being a single mother is a very bad thing then I am judgemental.
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Yo mama has so many teeth missing, it looks like her tongue is in jail.
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like sands through the hourglass....
Submitted by boston61 on Tue, 09/27/2011 - 11:37am.
The truth is if you are really in love with someone just holding their hand is a thrill. Just being near them makes you happy.
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Do the rest of your Amish brothers and sisters know you're on the internet?
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
Come on are we really this fucking sensitive now?? gimme a break
Submitted by boston61 on Tue, 09/27/2011 - 10:27am.
Single mothers by choice are the biggest parasitic losers in our country.
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Yo mama so stupid she put paper on the television and called it paper view
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like sands through the hourglass....
"How can you seriously take the advice of a mutated ostrich egg who tells you to keep your chonies on during the first date? That makes no sense. If I don't fuck a trick on the first date, how do I know if I want to fuck them on the second date? Answer that, Patti!"
ahahahahaha. i have been wondering this for so long! thank you mk for articulating it beautifully as always! i have to admit, i have a sick obsession with this show...it's like watching a trainwreck that gets worse and worse every time. i just can't stop! help.
www.hangryhippo.com: Where hunger, anger, media consumption, and satire meet for a snack
If thinking being a single mother is a very bad thing then I am judgemental.
Hahaha Oxygen!!
Yo mama so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers
hahahahahaha @ the "Yo Mama" jokes!
Yo mama is so old when she lifted a breast a pilgrim fell out.
@Boston61....don't be so judgemental. Life's too short. Eat a ding dong once in a while.
The truth is if you are really in love with someone just holding their hand is a thrill. Just being near them makes you happy.
*giggling my ass off*
Yo mama so nasty, she made Speed Stick slow down
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Tue, 09/27/2011 - 11:10am.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Tue, 09/27/2011 - 11:05am.
Good thing I'm not horny I guess.
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OH YOU
Hahaha 8^)
yo mama's so fat she stepped on the scale and it died
ahahahahah sweetas
B, Yo Mama so fat when she went to the movies she sat next to everyone
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like sands through the hourglass....