The Jan Brady to Kate Middleton’s Marcia went to the Temperley show in London yesterday and was seated in the front row right next to Rosario Dawson and the fermented Peach that not even a drunk moose would nibble on right before she was being shipped off to rehab. The Happening of Pippa Middleton has died down lately, but some photographers are still crawling up her skirt like the love potion concocted by Anne Bancroft that only attracts ginger princes lives up there. However, Pippa is a fine lady of the court who knows that if her tulip-in-waiting is captured in picture form, The Queen will revoke her front row fashion show privileges and banish her to the shed out back to scrub potatoes with Fergie.
Even though Pippa keeps her stems firmly shut, the photographer still managed to get up her skirt. Now, the only time I see vaginas is when I watch a Bang Bus porn and I usually fast forward through those parts to get the romantic stuff like when the dude repeatedly slaps his penis on the chick’s tongue. (Why does he do that? Is he looking to make sure she doesn’t have tonsillitis? He’s not a doctor. His dick isn’t is a tongue depressor. Don’t do that more than once.) But even though I’m not exactly familiar with the ins and outs of snatch, I’m sure that if I had to pick a vagina out in a line-up that picture of Pippa would not make the cut. Pippa is making one of those trompe l’oeil coochies with her thighs. She fooled us!
But then again, would you really put it past Pippa’s flower to get up a little closer to the camera to get in the shot? Hmmm indeed!