On the left is a Sarah Palin-like puta who can see married dick from her vag, in the middle is an old ass fool who is no longer welcome in the galaxy and on the right is the ethereal moon goddess who hasn’t been the same ever since the startheart in her chest was turned to dust by her true love.
The surface of the moon covered itself with a thin layer of tears when 81-year-old Buzz Aldrin ended his 23 year marriage to the celestial blossom he plucked from the orb of the night those many years ago. Lois Aldrin has been lost ever since and has been shuffling her precious feet against the dirt of the earth looking for a new purpose. Lois thought maybe a fire would warm her spirit, so she used her forehead to focus the sun’s rays on a pile of twigs and it started a fire, but she was still cold on the inside.
Meanwhile, Lois’ true love and the astronaut who brought her to earth was off landing his geezer dick on a 51-year-old marketing executive named Homewrecking Sucia Skank (government name: Michelle Sucillon). Lois gently cooed out (sounds like a lunar swan tip toeing along the craters) to Page Six about how she wants Buzz back, but Michelle is a “predator” and won’t let her man go. Let’s all hum out the melody to Moon River as we read Lois’ sad soliloquy.
“He’s not [officially] divorced yet. It is kind of scandalous. We’ve had a great life, and I don’t blame Buzz, I blame the girl. She’s a predator, that’s my opinion.
He filed for divorce in June. The book signing where they met was in 2009, and I was there. She was kind of aggressive. But he didn’t start seeing her then. He’s been seeing her for about a year. There are women out here in Los Angeles that go after men, they go after celebrities. Women should leave married men alone.
He’s 81 and having kind of a midlife crisis in old age … I still think Buzz is the most wonderful man in the world, and I still love him. I would hope we get back together … but I can’t tell him what to do. I think most wives warn their husbands of predatory women … I am a very moral person.”
That Sucia-llon tramp and gross Buzz Aldrin deserve each other and may they spend their eternity in a purgatory where a full moon never rises. Lois is too good for all of this. Buzz has chosen to go with the dark side, so Lois should return to her hometown of the moon where she is worshiped for the beautiful Asian cat crater head she truly is.