Hot Ensemble Of The Month Goes To Uma Thurman!
The days of freezer burned fupas are quickly coming upon those of us who live in the Northeast, so now is the perfect time to let your gut pores breathe in air before they have to go into hibernation. Uma Thurman knows this and so she wore the official Honey Badger weekday uniform as she strolled out with her children in NYC on Wednesday.
Somebody hand me a double-sided anything and dip it in some kitchen grease, because both UsWeekly and the Daily Mail need to get fucked for calling this perfect ensemble "bizarre" and "slobby." Those jealous shade queens must be using an opposite dictionary, because they really meant to say this whole entire look is "practical" and "SO NOW."
The hat tells me that Uma likes a touch of retro, because she's obviously wearing the cap my mom's best friend bought at Michael's, hoping she'd find the time to glamourize it with puffy glitter paint and dot lettering (she never did). The knotted shirts tell me that Uma doesn't believe in shirt favoritism and so she not only cut off the circulation of her top shirt, but she did it to her bottom shirt too. And finally, the Marlboros tucked into her bra strap loudly tells me that she's just a practical bitch and a people person who warmly embraces crackhead hobos asking her for a cigarette every other block. Does Playtex sell the bra straps alone, because I've been looking for a practical place to keep my Trident.
Shut down every stupid Best Dressed of the Year list, because nothing will ever top this.