Good Morning, Here's A ScarJo Nipple To Go With Your Cup Of Sanka

Earlier this morning, the earth stopped spinning for two seconds, because every titty-loving creature held their breaths and pulled down their chonies at the same time when the words "SCARLETT JOHANSSON NUDE PICTURES LEAKED" were stamped on the internet's taint and BOOM! This is what everyone has been waiting for!

This is why wars are being fought! Every single fap has been a dress rehearsal for this moment! This is why peens get up in the morning! Etc! Etc! Etc! But then it happened, and nothing. Nobody put down their guns and started jacking. The world kept being a shit place. How do I really, really know? Well, I got up to pee this morning, then put on my way too-tight, ball-hugging shorty shorts, sat down in front of this laptop and out came some tardy for the party piss giving me a wet spot that I swear my mom's bitchy cat is judging me for. I see a "You know, the litter box is just over there..." look coming from his prissy eyes. ScarJo's nipple gracing the internet was supposed to stop shit like this from happening. We've been lied to!

But anyway, (NSFW unless you work for UNICEF) click here to see ScarJo's nipple, ass and ugly wallpaper. TMZ says that the FBI is investigating this since the pictures were hacked from her cell phone by the same ho who hacked Vanessa Hudgens and MiserAlba. But the FBI don't need to investigate this shit since this isn't ScarJo. It's obviously Not Blake Lively.

Posted by: Michael K

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Submitted by caprica six on Thu, 09/15/2011 - 6:11pm.

OKAY, IF YOU FKING NEED TO STAND AROUND AND FKING SMARTPHONE SHIT OF YOUR BODY THINKING THAT SHIT CAN'T BE HACKED, THEN YOU SHOULD BE HACKED, SLUNT. FKING CRIST.

People, stop fucking taking dumb naked pics of yourself and this shit won't fucking happen. Not rocket science. Jesus FUCKING Christ.
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Crazy Heart, "Weary Kind", Jeff Bridges - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z8monRJzzvU
Dre,Eminem, Skylar - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VA770wpLX-Q&ob=av3e

Submitted by happy food girl on Thu, 09/15/2011 - 6:06pm.

She's trying to get the FBI involved, really? Honestly, unless if have a third tit growing out of my chest, who the fuck cares if people see me naked? I hate her fucking acting, but at least she looks good naked.

Submitted by Athenys on Thu, 09/15/2011 - 2:17pm.

Why is it that celebritards find it necessary to take crude photos/videos of themselves on devices that can get hacked into so easily? I believe a lot of them do it on purpose. Don't you just love all of that false indignation once their nekkid ass gets plastered all over the internet? Just because you have a decent figure doesn't mean you should gamble with your reputation. Fame whores all of 'em...

Submitted by phillyphillie on Thu, 09/15/2011 - 6:48am.

She should have leaked these 6 years ago when people actually thought she was cute and had talent. Now, it's just sad.

Submitted by nightowl on Thu, 09/15/2011 - 12:27am.

Woah. Pretty much everyone here thinks she's ugly. Really? I think she's gorgeous. Her nose is fine, she's got nice full lips she's ot nice eyes.

She and I have similar sounding voices except I don't smoke. I get self-conscious of mine because sometimes it gets SO LOW. On the plus side, a guy in my voice-over class asked me to do a voice-over for a short film he's workin on. We had taken a class once and he'd heard my so-called " sexy" voice.

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Submitted by Nightowl:

I basically, like, literally wished that I had been here to conversate about this story, no pun ontended. Irregardless, I technically was reading all

Submitted by nightowl on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 11:41pm.

Instead of leaking pictures and then feigning modesty why not call a paparazzo and go to a nude beach? That way you could really say that you were just minding your business and thought you had privacy.

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Submitted by Nightowl:

I basically, like, literally wished that I had been here to conversate about this story, no pun ontended. Irregardless, I technically was reading all the proverbial posts, per se.

Submitted by ItsBritneyBitches on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 11:07pm.

Why do all of these actresses even pretend to be ladies and dress up in the most beautiful dresses when they pose like sluts at home??? They're all sluts.

Submitted by not shocked on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 8:12pm.

as bad as those nudie pics chicks 'accidently' send to other girls boyfriends or girlfriends, what the hell Scar-jo, are we still in high school???

Submitted by bookworm on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 7:58pm.

I wonder if she sent them to that fugly, craggy faced Penn? How dumb must these celebs be to do this! Or maybe she did it on purpose? Is her career waning?

And calling in the FBI, WTF! Wouldn't the FBI have more important things to do lol. Jesus Hollyweird assholes get special treatment!

Submitted by SANS FARDS on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 5:21pm.

Hacking ScarHo's phone? Who could have DONE such a dastardly deed?

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"Fuck that guy for thinking anyone and everyone should want to do Glee."

- Dave Grohl

Submitted by MadgesVadge on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 5:05pm.

Sounds like I might be in the minority here, but I think she's very beautiful. Anyone can work hard for a good body, but to look pretty without any makeup on in a photo taken from a camera phone is no small feat. I've always liked her, but the whole "my phone was hacked" thing is BS.

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"I have a very poor way of concealing my dislike of people and/or things." -- Evil_Cupcake's Mom

Submitted by Who Datt on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 4:36pm.

Something about this just doesn't add up. Isn't this a "professional" who steadfastly refuses to do *any* nude shots in her film, like Natalie Portman? How can this "actress" justify not wanting to drop draws in order to prevent her image being exploited (meaning jacked off on by horny pervs) and then turn around and show tittay and badonkadonk on her damn cellphone cam? Honey, *more* people have seen your pink bits with this little incident than any would have with your innumerable underperforming pics. How many geeks are right now cleaning off their newly sticky tablets with Clorox wipes while muttering: "I just saw Black Widow's boobies"?

Submitted by anony54321 on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 3:18pm.

oh yeah.... ryan and sandra!

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The McCanns Did It

Submitted by almostfamous88 on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 3:13pm.

Never thought she was that lame or desperate...guess her horrible acting paired with Ryan and Sandra's outings are getting to her...Megan Fox is now a few notches above her on my respect o meter - profound

Submitted by anony54321 on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 3:06pm.

her body isnt bad, but my boobs looked better than hers till i was 43 years old, and thats a fact.

her butt is not unpleasant, but it is not a marvel.

and her face is homely at best, ugly at worst.

so, not sure who she slept with to get where she is today, but it musta been somebody. i have three young ladies in my building, all prettier than her no contest.

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The McCanns Did It

Submitted by Bree on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 3:01pm.

Submitted by saltydog88 on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 1:07pm.
just proves what I've been saying for years, that she is unbelievable average looking when you take away spanks, lighting, and professional hair and make-up...there is a reason she looks dumpy in all her candid photos...because she is

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I half agree with you on this one, I do totally agree that she is average looking. I don't know why people are getting all worked up over this. She looks average, this "leaked" shit happens all the time, and if you don't want nekkid pictures of you popping up then at least take nekkid pictures without your face in it.

Submitted by remingtonh on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 2:18pm.

I wish I knew how to hack into an iPhone.

Submitted by Whatever on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 2:17pm.

Pictures leaked? Riiiiiiiiight. Why don't these toads just pose for playboy if they want the world to see them naked?

Submitted by CoconutCoochie on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 1:34pm.

I really wouldn't have expected ScarJo to do that kind of thing.
Her body is, not surprisingly, banging.

Submitted by crankenstein on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 1:30pm.

Crankenstein

thank you wood dragon its true - so fucking stupid. if you're such a freaking narcissist that you have to take nude photos of yourself well then tough shit -

Submitted by Wood Dragon on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 1:28pm.

Why do these fucktards keep taking nudies of themselves then getting all worked up when they surface? There is no total security to ANY electronic device.

Here some old guy advice given to me by someone wiser than myself.

Bear in mind everyday
That everything you do
will someday see the light of day.

Submitted by dfanintheD on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 12:41pm.

I would love to be as beautiful as ScarJo. I am glad I've never been touched by Sean Penn.

Submitted by TheCocoaCritic on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 12:33pm.

TMZ just reported Mila Kunis got hacked.

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http://cocoacritic.net

Submitted by Provolone on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 12:33pm.

Perfect ASS and TITS!! YAYYYYY!

Submitted by Twat Muffin on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 12:29pm.

Never could stand ScarHo -- I agree with Athina totally. Esp. dislike her ever since she was banging my man Sean Penn.

Slurpee -- OMG, I'd kill to see your cell phone pictures of Daisy. Kiss her for me, will ya? I don't know if you remember, but I grew up with bassets -- best dogs ever!!!

Submitted by femguide on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 12:13pm.

I wish there were harsher punishments for people who hack and leak private material and information. Am I alone here?

** http://soundcloud.com/tigersnap/northern-lights **

Submitted by AtomicCity on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 11:45am.

Submitted by Goldigga on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 11:57am.
Submitted by AtomicCity on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 9:46am.

I hope to jeebus no one ever hacks into my iphone. If my photos of my carriage ride in Savannah or Lookout Mountain in Chattanooga were leaked I'd die! OMG. You can like see 7 states from Lookout Mountain y'all!

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You filthy bitch, you ;) *dies laughing*

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What can I say, I am a dirty whore. And I don't even know how many pics of my dog are on there.

"A candle loses nothing of its light by lighting another candle."--catholicschoolgirl

Submitted by Zorba-the-Geek on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 11:38am.

Yesssss!!

I'm a straight woman but I lurve me some nekkid celebrities. ScarJo always acted like she was too good to show her boobies, but hello! These are some nice boobies, girl, show them off. Like the ass too. Just go ahead and be nekkid in ALL your movies, girl, don't listen to the haters.

Submitted by saltydog88 on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 11:37am.

just proves what I've been saying for years, that she is unbelievable average looking when you take away spanks, lighting, and professional hair and make-up...there is a reason she looks dumpy in all her candid photos...because she is

Submitted by El Bastardo on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 11:32am.

My lone sexual orgasmic hobbies are of NO concern to you. REPORTED for invasion of privacy.

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Submitted by gladyslove on Tue, 07/05/2011 - 11:19pm.
You name should be El Retardo.

Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 11:30am.

Your chaffed palms are saying otherwise ELB!

Submitted by El Bastardo on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 11:29am.

SHUT UP M.E I'M NOT. >:(

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Submitted by gladyslove on Tue, 07/05/2011 - 11:19pm.
You name should be El Retardo.

Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 11:27am.

STOP FAPPING IN PUBLIC ELB!

Submitted by El Bastardo on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 11:23am.

I need to toss her salad 4EVA!!!

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Submitted by gladyslove on Tue, 07/05/2011 - 11:19pm.
You name should be El Retardo.

Submitted by RoadDogXXIV on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 11:20am.

Nah, not doing it. This is the definition of a butterface. And the boobs aren't that good anymore. Amber Heard, ScarJo's clone, looks a billion times better, and she munches carpets! What does that tell ya? Hey, call me gay or what have you, but my taste in women doesn't fall into the level of overrated. You give me Aly Michalka (another actress who has the body to balance out her plastic boobs and face), Kelly Brook (should I have to explain?), or one of the girls from Nuts magazine, and you have a satisfied customer.

Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 10:51am.

Boring.

*goes back to watching Taste the Blood of Dracula*

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You must forgive my curiosity, madam, and open your knees.

Submitted by sinjin on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 10:38am.

How exactly does one hack your phone? Do they need your phone number? And how does some random guy (you know it was a guy!) get it?

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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 10:38am.

Submitted by sinjin on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 12:05pm.
She's filming or wrapping up a movie isn't she? So....this must mean it must be awful.

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The Avengers, with MY Jeremy Renner, who better not have gotten these pics sent to him!

Submitted by sinjin on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 10:35am.

She's filming or wrapping up a movie isn't she? So....this must mean it must be awful.

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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)

Submitted by Goldigga on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 10:27am.

Submitted by AtomicCity on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 9:46am.

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You filthy bitch, you ;) *dies laughing*

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"Your mama is going to make George Clooney happier than anybody ever could!" - MK

Submitted by RustyHooligan on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 10:22am.

Submitted by Slurpee on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 10:26am.

I can't figure out how to use my cell camera. But my son knows how. So I've pretty much just got oodles and oodles of pics of our basset hound Daisy on my phone.

Hwat!!

Submitted by mharker on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 10:15am.

Well, what's a girl to do when everyone forgot she was supposed to be a future Oscar winner, no one cares about her singing career, Woody Allen dumped her, and no one cares that she won a Tony award? Bring out the T&A! Even if this isn't her, I would not be surprised if her publicist was behind this.

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Silly rabbit.

Submitted by yucko on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 10:09am.

Submitted by AtomicCity on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 9:46am.
I think the bum is lovely. The boobies, meh.
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Agreed.

Although, regarding whomever said something about an "attention whore"--yeah, it's moronic for a celeb to leave nudes on their cell phone, but... how exactly does sending nude pics to a (presumably) boyfriend make you an attention whore? Scarlett's not exactly a paparazzi freak.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 10:01am.

these people are such idiots. They will never learn

If you don't want pics leaked, DON'T TAKE THEM.

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But he's been pretty much yellow, and I've been kind of blue
But all I can see is red, red red red red now
What am I gonna do?

Submitted by MickeyHolland on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 9:45am.

What's wrong with people today? I look nothing less than phenomenal, but you don't see me taking butt shots of myself with my cell phone. *tries to squeeze mow cow hiney into display frame*

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Who are you calling silly cow?

Submitted by Anonymoussss on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 9:42am.

Submitted by BBGemini on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 9:36am.
That nose is hideous. Reminds me of a guy I dated for 2 minutes. Like her, he had the kind of nostrils where you can always see when they have a cold. Blechk. Even nastier when people with shnozes like that have sniffles out in the cold -- you can see frozen snotties.

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I simultaneously LOL'd and gagged.

Submitted by SpiceDong on Wed, 09/14/2011 - 9:38am.

i am certainly no prude but I cannot fathom why these celebs keep taking nude shots and keeping them on their cell phones or sending them to people...you know either way they will come to light. is these her way of getting in the news again? she had been quiet since her break up from Sean Peen.

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"So if u don't like 'the difficult brown'.. Don't apply" - Sinead O'Connor