Would You Hit It?

September 13, 2011 / Posted by:

If you need to know “What IT is?” before answering my question then we can’t sit at the same table anymore, because I only associate myself with shameless whore sluts who sit on the face and ask questions later. But since you really need to know, here’s Johnny Depp in complete Barnabas Collins drag on the set of the new Tim Burton’s Dark Shadows that is only being made so they can make millions upon millions of dollars off of Goth teens by selling t-shirts and plastic lunchboxes of this mess at Hot Topic. NO! They’re really making this, because Tim Burton owns majority stock in the company that produces that white cream make-up shit that he slathers on Johnny Depp’s face in every one of his movies. Duh.

And yes, Johnny looks like Madge as Michael Jackson, but I still would. It’s not like Johnny’s peen is covered in vampire cream and decorated with Liza Minnelli sideburns made from black construction paper. Actually, it probably is since Johnny is really fucking method.

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