BREAKING: Motherhood Forces Posh To Carry More Than Her Weight
Either Posh had super-slim, non-bulging steel biceps installed into her arms and is wearing a Lacroix lifting belt or Baby Harper Seven weighs as much as a mockingbird's whisper.
Baby Harper Seven might be the heaviest person, place or thing that Posh has ever carried in the history of her life. It's like watching a dragonfly give a baby bunny a front piggyback ride. The power of motherhood is no joke. Posh is clutching at Baby Harper with her claws the same way she clutched the limited-edition Louis Vuitton ball bag Becks got her for Christmas one year.
My awe at Posh's sudden HULK OUT powers almost made my eyes overlook the bizarre shit that's playing down below. The dress is very "kindergarten teachers takes off her cardigan to move some heavy boxes" and those boots are "my sister in junior high school thinking she's the shit." Just because you're a mother to a newborn doesn't mean you should ignore your #1 responsibility in life which is to always match your dress to your boots. Bitch is on notice!
On a positive note, I applaud Baby Harper for already trying to perfect her mother's signature shankface. Although, Baby Harper needs less squint and more eyes that say "You're so fat that just looking at you is making me gain calories. Poof. Be gone."
That baby is so cute, glad to see she is probably being fed black market mother's milk, nice healthy post natal progression and growth. I hope she is a strong willed princess who can take on her mum when the time comes, she a healthy big boned girl who probably drained Posh of all her skeletal minerals and muscle protein.
However thin Posh is, that baby is well fed! The creases behind her knees are yummy. She is too cute for words.
Can't hate on this... beautiful picture!
Can never hate on Posh. I think she's charming, but she doesn't get as even media coverage here as she does back in the UK, so you don't get to see the sweet side of her. I also loved her book. Stuff like this is why I can't hate on her:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znBKhdU93FA
And
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hhvSFWvfMrk&feature=fvst
C-U-T-E
10th Anniversary of 9/11? I wouldn't be caught dead ANYWHERE near NYC or DC.
Plus I just read that there are confirmed reports of a terrorist plot for that day.
I'm totally convinced she took H7 to New York to commemorate 9/11. Why else should one go to NYC two days before the anniversary? That's why the severe baby clothes. This is one profound, intellectually and politically alert woman if there ever was one. I too am all for an early chirrens lesson in history. Go Vicky!
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Auri sacra fames
I love the receding hairline on the babeh :) :) It always cracks me up when babies' hair grows in back to front.
You know, I don't hate Posh. She seems like someone I should hate, but I just don't.
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"Hooooooty who give an eff about Haiti?! I don't! BAM!" - MK as Taylor Momsen
I think it's kinda silly to "carry" your baby and not put it in a carseat carrier dealy? Seems safer to be strapped in a carrier and not have your twig mom carrying you around in 10 inch heels.
We see how well that ended up for Britney Shears...
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Hold up! Hell NO! Like Britney Spears I wear no drawers!
Shes holding her kinda weird.
The baby is cute but her outfit is so frumpy? Why is she not wearing a Herve Leger onesie and Christian Loubotin (spelling?) platforms? She doesn't even even have pierced ears! (i got mine pierced when I was about 3days old).
Posh is a good mother.
That is all.
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Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
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Cute little girl. Whatever, it's a baby. They pretty much all look alike until around 8-9 months.
Submitted by kndall44 on Fri, 09/09/2011 - 2:30am.
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My thoughts exactly, that Posh's kid looks exactly like Trig Palin..
Submitted by filthy cute on Fri, 09/09/2011 - 12:01am.
Is it just me or does that baby look "special"?
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It's just you.
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Wow...she is REALLLLLY happy to have her little girl. She never carried any of her boys around in public after they were born like this. Yet in like 3 days there have been LOADS of pictures of her carrying Harper around.
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I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.
~Mitch Hedberg
Team Don't Hate on Posh. I think the way she is carrying the baby looks awkward because she is cradling her protectively. I also think she's smart enough to create a public persona and funny enough to get that the act is all part of the "product." I remember her being interviewed by Perez Hilton one time and she said she couldn't be seen in public "laughing, smiling, or GOD FORBID - eating!"
As much as I love Posh...bringing out newborn infront hundreds of people outside is the dumbest shit any mother can do esp with paps there and all that flashing...poor kid can be scared for life to be in that kinda environment
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Fist Pump!
Submitted by justincase on Thu, 09/08/2011 - 9:23pm.
Her baby holding technique is truly awkward. It's hard to believe this is her fourth child. Maybe she's postpartum depressed to make such a sour-puss.
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YES! that is exactly what I was thinking. Woman looks very unfamiliar with holding a kid. Guess this is only one of a handful of times she's had to hold one. Sad.
Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun.
-Ash
I dunno; Baby Harper looks like she's thinking "What in the G-D hell am I wearing?" and "I am SO OVER this shit." Poor Baby Harper. She's gonna get trotted out evem more than Suri Cruise (but better dressed) or maybe even more than the Holy Army (but without the Montenegro style or fishfin mohawks, all taboo on Posh's watch).
Poor Baby Harper.
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My thoughts exactly, that Posh's kid looks exactly like Trig Palin..
Submitted by filthy cute on Fri, 09/09/2011 - 12:01am.
Is it just me or does that baby look "special"?
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Trig:
http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQXMoBur-zAc4EVADGeFnZH1vZUZaBiO...
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Re. the poor baby holding, she's angling for maxium money shots, hanging baby far off her shoulder with face pointed out, pushing up rump.
Damn lucky she didn't trip à la Britney..
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Submitted by justincase on Thu, 09/08/2011 - 9:23pm.
Her baby holding technique is truly awkward. It's hard to believe this is her fourth child. Maybe she's postpartum depressed to make such a sour-puss.
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That's what I thought. I wonder if she is breastfeeding.
Is it just me or does that baby look "special"?
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I flew too close to the sun on wings of pastrami.
That kid needs some tatts. And a wool hat.
I want to pinch those chubby little legs! That is one adorable baby girl!
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Who are you calling silly cow?
Where are H7's Red Bottoms?
what an adorable healthy looking baby, i say healthy cause she wouldn't be if her mother had an eating disorder, case closed, as for the Mother's bitchface most of you comment, if you were also chased by a bunch of sexually frustrated, low-life paparazzi men who would keep stalking you and saying shitty things about your life/looks right to your face you wouldn't go into a happy place either,
She's atleast heavier than Waity Katy. On E! news I had misheard Gulianna (sp.) say Harpur Beckham and it sounded like Barbara Beckham. Barbara Beckham would have been a baddass name.
Remember in the 90's when people said "hey, its the 90s right?"
Her baby holding technique is truly awkward. It's hard to believe this is her fourth child. Maybe she's postpartum depressed to make such a sour-puss.
harper's bizarre
her boobies look great.
for those saying she's not too skinny... i only fuck chicks with eating disorders... and i'd like to do her. speaking of skinny chicks: can anyone tell me what happened to whitney cummings face?
Val from "Knots Landing" wants her boots back.
Harper looks like Suri. I wonder if Posh and Katie used the same sperm donor?
Don't dis POSH, writer of this blog, dont do it.
I just want to know who that bodyguard is.
I'd totally hit it.
Oh, and that baby is freaking adorable!
Posh is thinking:
1. Can I exchange it for a thinner, more fashionable version?
2. I thought I asked for XXX-small!
3. Does this (the baby) make me look fat?
4. I wonder if they make six inch Louboutins in XXX-teeny, tiny, weeny sizes?
5. I don't do fat and that includes fat babies!
6. I've gotta get this fat assed bitch on a treadmill STAT!
Dang! H7 is ADORABLE. Nice dress and boots Posh...and please keep the weight on.
Gah. That baby is making my ovaries flutter. She's so cute!
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Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
Awwww...she's so yittle.
I'm just happy she doesn't put those stupid ass giant headbands on her head. I used to throw my sister the side eye when she put them on my niece.
Anyways, I love Posh and Harper is sweet looking.
Submitted by snowball on Thu, 09/08/2011 - 6:17pm.
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they seem (posh and leanne) to have the body type that doesn't lend itself to appearing really skinny. even though they are obviously thin, they seem to have a certain constitution and muscle mass about them that keeps them from looking ultra skinny.
Posh holds bebe for 30 seconds for zillion cameras. Excitement. Money is made. *yawn, nap*
To me the little one is still Élancé Pout - the best name conjured by Uncle MK.
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"End well: this isn't going to." - MK
Posh needs a haircut. It's looking too scraggly thin to be worn this length.
Babies are just tiny drunk people.
I completely agree that she seems to love her family, as does the Becks. Whatever issues those 2 may have, it's obvious they love the little ones.
And yeah, she's an adorable baby. Just want to adjust the Posh arms.
"That is NOT how you hold a baby, trollop!"
:)
I think Ben Harper and six other cats should start a jazz combo called The Harper Seven.
baby is ADORBS..and really surprised she doesn't have her in overly girly clothing and stupid shoes. I like that she just has her in socks because it bothers me when parents feel like new babies need footwear.
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Annelle, honey, what do you say we talk some trash.
This child - either she'll develop anorexia like dear old mom, or she'll go in the entire opposite direction like Chaz Bono, but there is no way this little girl is growing up without an eating disorder. She is going to be all kids of fucked up about food.
If she is not pretty, her mom will hate her for being an embarrassment, and if she is pretty, her mom will hate her for being competition.
And it looks like maybe she has mommy's piggy nose.
This poor kid.