Madge Is Entitled To Like Any Flower She Wants, Thank You Very Much

Madge’s hydrangea horror made it all the way to CNN, bumping famine in Somalia and a plane crash in Russia from the top spot, and so her spokeswhore finally squirted out a response. Instead of just letting out a canned response like “She’s sorry for hurting her fan’s feelings and that hydrangea was donated to a dying child who loves hydrangeas but she’s still praying for a hydrangeacaust in the near future…fart…burp…etc…,” her rep apologized to the hydrangea.

“She’s entitled to like any flower she wants and she didn’t want to hurt the feeling of the hydrangeas of the world. No disrespect to the hydrangeas lovers of the world but she prefers different types of flowers.”

Hydrangeas already loathe Madge since her face reminds them of the hairless albino woodchucks that decapitate them at the stem, but it was nice of her rep to think of their feelings. It was also nice of her rep to not apologize to the fan who probably spent his last coin on buying that hydrangea for his favorite vampire in the world and is now surviving only on canal water and pigeon nails (true story). But I’m totally missing the point here.

Madge’s rep’s sarcastic bitchified response to her shady asshole move earned her 1000 extra cunt points, which moves her right under Kunty Karl in my Evil Cunts I Love list.