Over at UsWeekly, they have pictures of the struttin’ Canadian Magic Kingdom we know as Ryan Gosling “canoodling” with Eva Mendes at Disneyland on Saturday night. Ryan and Eva are currently shooting that movie together where he plays a death eater trash version of Draco Malfoy who left the wizard world to work as a house painter by day and a scooter racer by weekend (see above). A source type says that Eva and Ryan have always been friends, but now that she’s single and they’re working together, their fuck parts are really heating up for each other. And they made that shit perfectly clear at Disneyland.
Yes, Ryan is still hard up on Disneyland the same way your lady nipples are hard up for him. I swear, if Ryan told me he wanted to take me to the happiest place on earth for some churro eatin’, I’d be throwing a pissed look as soon as he got off on Katella Blvd. from the 57 freeway. Nothing kills a boner like the sight of Katella Blvd. UsWeekly had this to say about Ryan’s latest union:
“They were very playful. Eva was skipping around like a little girl…She would lean into him and she held his arm the entire time.”
And the sexy twosome did Disneyland right — riding the Toy Story ride, the California Screamin’ rollercoaster, a Little Mermaid adventure and the ferris wheel, snacking on churros, cotton candy and corn on the cob. “She fed him,” the onlooker says.
When the hipster maple leaf wants to really make a lady feel special, he takes her to anywhere but Disneyland since he takes all of his tricks there. BlakeLivelyOliviaWildeRachelMcAdamsKikiDunstetc.. They’ve all held his hand as the Toy Story ride attendant said to him “Why hello there, Mr. Gosling. Right this way to your favorite car. You prefer the yellow cannon, am I correct?”
If Ryan ever asks you out on a date, just ask him for the Fast Pass into his pants so you can bypass all that wooing at Disneyland shit.