Cher’s Got Your Number, Hussy!

September 1, 2011 / Posted by:

In case you haven’t heard, the bigoted crazies slithered out of their own asses and freaked out all over Facebook, message boards and ABC’s site over Chaz Bono joining the cast of Dancing with the Stars. Their argument is that DWTS is a family friendly show (nip slips and all) and is no place for the “LGBT agenda.” Little do they know that if you removed the L,G,B and T from Dancing with the Stars, you’d have Shuffleboard with the Stars and they’d only wear polo shirts and sloppy ponytails.

They don’t seem to mind that the mutated clown monster who was made from Lucifer’s toe jam (see: Nancy Grace) is in the cast, but they’re clutching their crucifixes over Chaz Bono. Okay. Buzzfeed has the worst of the worst reactions if that’s what you need to see today and below is my personal favorite from Memaw Carol:

OMG – did you hear that Chaz Bono (Sonney & chers) daughter, turned man will be one of the contestants on Dancing With The Stars? Hope he doesn’t get a hard on from dancing with his female partner. I hope this message doesn’t go to Hollywood! I hope it isn’t censored. OMG …I can’t believe I even said this. WHAT the hell, did they attached a dead mans “U know what to this freak”?

Oh, Carol. For someone who thinks she knows a lot about what’s going on in Chaz Bono’s down below parts, I would think you’d know that he hasn’t had a “dead man’s U know what” attached to his body yet. But I have a feeling that when you weren’t looking somebody attached a dead man’s anus over your mouth since what’s coming out of it is nothing but tired, old, dusty, grave dirt shit. Maybe you should look into that. And after you do, let’s get together to sip tea while we watch for swaying boners on DWTS. I know that’s the real reason you watch that shit, Carol. You dirty little filthy bird watcher. Get it while you can, ole’ girl!

Chaz Bono’s mother Cher also jumped to her son’s defense and asked her to Twatter followers to show their support for him:

lovelies! Chaz is Being Viciously Attacked on Blogs & Message boards about being on DWTS!This is Still America right ? It took guts 2 do it

I support him no matter what he chooses 2do! God! will there always be haters! It took COURAGE 2 do dwts ! TG Chaz has an Unlimited supply 

Can u guys check out sites & give him your support ? BTW …Mothers don’t stop Getting angry with stupid bigots who fk with their children !

It’s times like these that I forgive Cher for typing like a 12-year-old me in an AOL chat room.

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