Programming Note & Afternoon Crumbs
Programming Note: This will probably be my last post of the day, because I'm flying to California in a few hours to do some Driving Miss Daisy shit. My mom had shoulder surgery and can't operate a motor vehicle (OR SO SHE SAYS) so I have to chauffeur her around while she yells at me to not drive so fast and to count to 5 at every stop sign before hitting the gas. I'll be doing this for the next 3 weeks. Fun!
My flight isn't until tonight, but I'm leaving early since I've been told that the highways are full of Apocalypse-ready hos marching towards the safe lands. I know, perfect timing, especially since my apartment is in a mandatory evacuation zone. I'm not even trying to board shit. I'm taking my dog, the only t-shirt I wear and saying a prayer that Irene doesn't break my favorite new bong. But anyway, fuck that bitch Irene, In-N-Out here I come! Now on to crumbs....
Andrew Garfield is so the Anne Archer to Jim Carrey's Glenn Close - Lainey Gossip
If Brit Brit was our history teacher, we'd all get As, because ho doesn't know which letters come after that - The Superficial
Team Orange Flowers - Towleroad
Lacey Schwimmer or Brooke Hogan in a fun house mirror? - Hollywood Tuna
White Oprah's sumptuous skin looks like old coke marinating in kitchen grease - (site NSFW) Drunken Stepfather
Beyonce's new video looks like a commercial for House of Derriere's new line of glitter lube - Celebitchy
Justin Theroux is putting Sugar Mama Aniston's credit card to good use - Just Jared
Are you happy to see me or is that just an AAAAAAAAAAHHHH THAT'S A FUCKING SNAKE YOU CRAZY BITCH! - The Daily What
Man Down Code 10: Posh in flats - Popsugar
Peter Facinelli should always look like this - ICYDK
I'll say it, KAT FIGHT! - Crunk + Disorderly
Knocked up Duff, take 1 - Popoholic
Knocked up Duff, take 2 - Hollywood Rag
Did Cee Lo explode on a solid gold disco ball or did a solid gold disco ball explode on Cee Lo? - Moe Jackson
RiRi's new video sponsored by a Flip camera with no flash - The Berry
Pussy hole - Cityrag
(Image Source: instagr.am via Buzzfeed)
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Spot on with this write-up, I actually think this website needs rather more consideration. Ill most likely be again to read far more, thanks for that info.
sexier.com Covenant Streammate organotherapeutic Teen Porn hemoflagellate
Submitted by Manimal5 on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 8:50pm.
"Look no further than the two tribute performances scheduled for Sunday to see this tension in action."
Eeek. Britney is much more like the current MTV; Wino never was, tho she would have been good when MTV first started out. I'll wait for MK's analysis.
When the Levee Breaks
Avie © Sandy. All rights reserved in all Commonwealth countries.
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 8:38pm.
*boogie-woogie intro to Bob Seger song*
When the Levee Breaks
Avie © Sandy. All rights reserved in all Commonwealth countries.
"Look no further than the two tribute performances scheduled for Sunday to see this tension in action. A cast of pop stars will pay homage to both the recently deceased Amy Winehouse and the recently resurgent Britney Spears. The two are among the most important female artists of the past decade, and represent the two very different versions of MTV."
I usually like the VMA's but come on!!
Submitted by RustyHooligan on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 8:30pm.
I wonder if MK worries about his site when he's out, like new parents with an unknown babysitter at home? Or does he figure we're old enough to call someone if anything serious happens?
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If you slide backwards into the thread wearing nothing but a white button-down shirt, your underwear and crew socks while singing a Bob Seger tune into your old high school football trophy, we will have you forcibly removed from the site.
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And pharmaceuticals were invented for me and Liza Minelli. ©2011 BjorkYou.
I wonder if MK worries about his site when he's out, like new parents with an unknown babysitter at home? Or does he figure we're old enough to call someone if anything serious happens?
When the Levee Breaks
Avie © Sandy. All rights reserved in all Commonwealth countries.
LOL MK Cali is about as far away as you can get from Irene!
Mickey, he's home. :-)
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
Submitted by LaChaylo on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 5:06pm.
we'll just assume you are packing, but the light makes it hard to see!
If I had a dollar for every time I've heard that...
What Is and What Should Never Be
Has anyone watched and listened to that Beyonce song?
Hey, I don't know much about guns
But I, I've been shot by
Yooooooouuuuuuuuuuu!!!
Go to the 1:41 mark; her weave is trying to escape.
At 2:34, she's shedding the same tears when Jennifer Hudson won every single prestigious acting award in Beyonce's star vehicle, "Dream Girls."
@Rusty - we'll just assume you are packing, but the light makes it hard to see!
Submitted by LaChaylo on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 4:50pm.
I'm jealous of your sweet, personalized LZ avie!
hahaha. I don't know what to think. I don't normally fly too close to the sun--esply naked. I can't tell if I'm packing or not?
What Is and What Should Never Be
Rusty! I'm jealous of your sweet, personalized LZ avie!
http://www.collegehumor.com/video/3729600/fat-cat-barely-fits-in-its-yog...
Submitted by joe shmoe on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 4:22pm.
From the Lacey Schwimmer link (who the hell is she?) I wondered over to look at Lacey Chabert's cover of Maxim magazine.
*crying* Sweet little Claudia Salinger is rolling around semi-nude? And dirty old men are furiously fapping to that? That just isn't right.
Party of Two. That face!!
What Is and What Should Never Be
From the Lacey Schwimmer link (who the hell is she?) I wondered over to look at Lacey Chabert's cover of Maxim magazine.
*crying* Sweet little Claudia Salinger is rolling around semi-nude? And dirty old men are furiously fapping to that? That just isn't right.
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"...je ne conseillerais pas à DSK de raconter ce qui s’est passé dans la chambre. Ce n’était pas un crime, voilà tout." ~B. Brafman.
Bull.Shit.
I have soft spot for Bloomberg, too. It's my stool.
Nothing happening down here yet below 14th Street.
athens and Lem, are you still up?
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 1:33pm.
Submitted by jerseygirl17 on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 12:33pm.
Has your better half come home yet?
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Not yet Mickey. Probably around 7 pm. The worst isn't supposed to hit until later tonight, but still. Thanks for asking.
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
Hekki...wow, that's really sweet!
anonymouse, I have a soft spot for Bloomberg, too. I can't help it.
And when he starts speaking Spanish during his press conferences, I lose my shit. Every time. Totally devoid of accent. But the fact that he tries to reach my Latino brethren and sistren warms my heart. No other mayor has done that.
Omgs. Ida Morgenstern! lol I feel dated knowing that ref. :>
I have a soft spot for Bloomberg...I work for Johns Hopkins and he is an extremely generous person....to the point where they named a building after him.
Golddiggah...that video is hilarious! Did you watch her other ones?!! Dying over here. Thanks for posting!
"Submitted by Dixie McCall on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 7:55am.
@ Anonymouse73: Apparently, I was told it was a scheduled sale, so the approach of Irene was mere happenstance. Most of the broads looked like Ida Morgenstern (Rhoda's mom). I managed to grab some great undie thangs at great prices.
I do think Bloomberg is right: better safe than sorry.
"
Submitted by Danistar on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 11:05am.
@kikichanelconspiracy; I'm in Long Island. Thank you for calming my nerves. : ) They say it is going to hit us by midnight tonight and we will be experiencing the worst of it from that time until 2pm.
Me too but I'm well North of the evacuation zones. I hate losing power for ONE minute...that's my biggest worry right now.
Submitted by from athens on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 1:55pm
haha that song is gonna go directly to my dreams, I just know it.
lemonene sing it girl!
Mk, looks like you made it safely with your flight. We'z happy. That is all. ♥
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Sinead's rockin' slore-queen checklist:
I don't care if he is from the planet Zog.
Stubble is a non-negotiable must.
Must be very 'snuggly'. Not just wham-bam.
Must be wham-bam.
Submitted by Bjork You on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 11:41am.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, if you wannna get my love, love, love, love...
If you pray for me and hope, hope, hope ...
Give the password
Glad to know you are OK, Bjorky
Submitted by jerseygirl17 on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 12:33pm.
Has your better half come home yet?
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"It is unwise to be too sure of one's own wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err."
Mahatma Gandhi
be safe people! i want all my dlisters (no matter the location) to be well and safe so that i can keep on reading your amazingly funny posts! aaaiet? :-*
'We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.'
Grrr . . . anxiously waiting for hubby to get home from work. Apparently department store employees are "essential emergency personnel", because the mall is closing early due to weather, but they are staying open.
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
Hmph. The Tropical Storm Watch for my geographical area has been upgraded to a Warning, which means the stawm is veering left. I was kind of hoping it would smack into L.I. and drown all the Lohans and their ilk, but now it appears it will drown some of the Ronsons instead.
My husband JUST LEFT to go buy a new sump pump for the basement, which floods constantly as it is. This ought to be good.
everytime is like the first time with this masterpiece,Bonnie Tyler and Samantha Fox troll around here frequently,Michalis has also worked with Ian Gillan!
Yes, here's the live version (because I know that you can't get enough of him):
The commercial is talking about his past work with stars such as Bonnie Tyler, right?:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hiTOVNRS-vw&feature=related
That is how Rhythm Nation should have done.
Is Greece reporting on this East Coast hurricane?
bjork this communication is autotuned,the eurovision night performance destroyed the concept of singing once and for all,but yes this video is amazing too!
Hey athens!
We are waiting for this East Coast, Category 1 hurricane.
So sad that I've curbed on the weed. Alas. But I'm not scared because I have bunny rabbits to protect me. No, I haven't forgotten.
Starts at .57:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=roVQLBO2LgQ&feature=related
stay safe people,bjork what is this situation,it feels like that Lerna video!
@kikichanelconspiracy; I'm in Long Island. Thank you for calming my nerves. : ) They say it is going to hit us by midnight tonight and we will be experiencing the worst of it from that time until 2pm.
"I make myself sick, get on my own nerves. Immature, insecure grown up nerd."
-Fatlip (The Pharcyde)
Looks like you made it to CA safely. Hope your mom recovers quickly, MK, and that all the east coasters stay safe.
Blow me Irene
Ha! No idea who wrote that sign, but I know I would like them.
Submitted by Hekki on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 10:38am.
Bjork, yeah UES. You're in Chelsea, right? What floor are you?
I just took the youngest out for a walk. Everything was normal except half the stores up here are closed. People seemed pretty chill. I think many were doing what we were - getting outside while it's still feasible.
Friends of ours from NJ just texted to say they weren't going to drive in to see us today, after all. Oh, REALLY?
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Ha, ha!
NJ closed the Garden State Parkway. Tell your friends to come in, using the Holland Tunnel. Some people...
I'm in Community Board 2, below Chelsea. I wish a KFC was open. I just want crap food. Anyone else?
Submitted by agirl on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 10:41am.
"Illuminating"? Oh.... my misunderstanding.
What Is and What Should Never Be
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 10:35am.
OMG, did MK make it out OK or is this a ghost posting from beyond the grave?!?!!
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mMmmmMmMAaAayYBbBBBEeEe Iitt''sssss HhiiISiSSssSSssss
G HHH OO OOOO S S S S T T T T T T ! ! ! ! !
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
@Rusty, but what will the light from the candles and flashlights be illuminating? Huh? With no power, after a while, no interwebs and that means NO PRON!!!!!!
*starts screaming and runs straight into the wall*
Submitted by agirl on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 10:21am.
...Bloomberg was again bleating about HOW DANGEROUS THE STORM IS AND ERRBODY WHO STAYS IN BRIGHTON BEACH WILL DROWN!!!! Shut up Bloomberg.
Q - how to watch porn without power? Oh, I should have thought of that earlier...
*gets really scared now*
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Bloomberg "bleating": ha, ha!!!! The Grinch needs to shut the fuck up. He's only useful when battling Chrissy Christie.
Yes, how will we get our porn on if the electricity goes? I don't have anymore erotic literature around; plus, it's not the same. This is the important stuff.
I rented "Priest" with Paul Bettany, some Korean film "The Housemaid," and some other vampire movie with some kid who's on "Gossip Girl." I notice that Bettany has been doing these kinds of movies (okay, one other, that one where he's the angel trying to save humankind from other angels who hate us). So, he either gets paid lots (bitch has three kids; two with his wife and one from her first baby daddy); he really likes the genre (yay!!); it's all he's getting; movies like this let him do indie movies where the pay scale is low; or all of the above. Anyway, he has a lovely profile.
Bjork, yeah UES. You're in Chelsea, right? What floor are you?
I just took the youngest out for a walk. Everything was normal except half the stores up here are closed. People seemed pretty chill. I think many were doing what we were - getting outside while it's still feasible.
Friends of ours from NJ just texted to say they weren't going to drive in to see us today, after all. Oh, REALLY?
OMG, did MK make it out OK or is this a ghost posting from beyond the grave?!?!!
Submitted by agirl on Sat, 08/27/2011 - 10:21am.
Q - how to watch porn without power? Oh, I should have thought of that earlier...
*gets really scared now*
What do you think the candles and flashlights are for?
What Is and What Should Never Be
Pffft it's a thunderstorm. No big deal.
hi
I am in NYC Brooklyn, no rain yet im just relaxing sleep in, will walk the dogs soon.
Last night there were cops with vans in every corner (very comforting) like if they expected looting. Other than a bad dream about someone house beign destroyed by a wave and flooding. I am assuming there will be flooding in NYC. My animals are acting normal.
I have plenty of food, I did food shooping recently, not storm related.
"I will pee myself today and when someone asks, "what is that smell?", I will happily tell them Veluptuous by KK!" Urmomma
OH GOD IRENE JUST WINKED AT ME! I THINK SHE'S A LESBYTERIAN!!!
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
MK posted a birthday list, so I'm assuming that he made it out o.k. Mother nature can be such a bitch. Bjork, Hekki and other East Coast dlisters, be safe!
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"It is unwise to be too sure of one's own wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err."
Mahatma Gandhi
It's cloudy right now in NYC, looks like it may have rained a bit earlier. No signs of panic so far.
My home is generally well-stocked so I won't go hongray, I did fill an extra gallon bottle with water and I will fill the tub later for just-in-case (water for washing and flushing), but I always have plenty of batteries (heh), flashlights, toilet paper, prescriptions are filled, have first-aid supplies and also candles. If power goes out I will have light, and radio,also internet and cell phone until those batteries run out, and plenty of reading material... and I am well inland and at the top of a hill so I am not too worried.
Bloomberg was again bleating about HOW DANGEROUS THE STORM IS AND ERRBODY WHO STAYS IN BRIGHTON BEACH WILL DROWN!!!! Shut up Bloomberg.
Q - how to watch porn without power? Oh, I should have thought of that earlier...
*gets really scared now*