Carrie Fisher Drops The Chunk
Carrie Fisher was on Today this morning to twirl out the body that is 50 pounds lighter thanks to her contract with Jenny Craig that states if she doesn't lose 50 pounds in 9 months they'll put her in a peen suit and sic John Travolta's hongray hongray hole on them. 54-year-old Carrie told Ann Curry that she decided to drop the chunk, because she couldn't look herself in the mirror anymore and was sick of lugging around two Jabba the Titties. Below is the interview of Carrie talking about how she wants to get back into the metal bikini while Ann Curry nearly pops her busted brows off from trying too hard to act like she really really cares:
Carrie knocked the Dominican dick out of John Travolta's mouth and waved it all around, so she can do no wrong. That is why I'm going to assume that Jenny Craig's food has a special chemical in it that turns body fat into a kind of Botox that rises up to your face.
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What's with all the hate? Haters gon' hate because they're insecure little bitches!!!!!Carrie can do whatever she wants. She's great. And she's way funnier and smarter than hatin'-ass stupid people who comment here will ever be!
You do realize that at one point she actually lost her mind, don't you? How about a little compassion muthafuckas?!
l ♥ this crazy bitch cause she don't give a shit
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♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
Ok, what happened to her nose? Please tell me something just happened to make it... droop like that? I really hope my nose doesn't start doing that with age, especially only at 50.
"I start things just to give them up." That is pretty much me, except I tend to go as far as I can and stop right before the finish line.
Love this woman. She looks great. I really liked the TV ad where she says, "Thank you for making me feel pretty one more time."
That said, it looks like she chose the Roseanne Barr face re-design model. Not sayin that's bad.
*shrug*
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I tried doing NutriSystem about six years ago. Pre-packaged meals came in a huge box from QVC for an outrageous amount of money (I think I paid $250).
It was Frankenfood and it tasted awful. One day I was eating chicken, and it really bothered me that I was eating chicken that didn't need to be refrigerated. I imagined all of the chemicals I was consuming and the visual made me physically ill.
I wouldn't recommend this pre-packaged, preservative loaded shit to any living creature.
http://smellmybutt.tumblr.com/
The fact that she lost 50 lbs that quickly means she'll be fat again by next summer.
http://smellmybutt.tumblr.com/
I look at Carrie and I think Girl just answer the question true. "I did it for the money! The money! I have a kid, what the fuck do you think I did it for!? I'm gonna be a heifer by Sunday. I'm carbo-loading in the limo right now."
Oh fuck ... one big commercial for Jenny fuckin Craig and their shitty fuckin 'food'. That shit is SHIT. As for Carrie, yeah she was funny once but now she reminds me of someone who is developing dementia. As for losing 50 pounds, she didn't need Jenny Craig for that. All she had to do was travel to Somalia for 9 months. Bitch woulda lost MORE than 50 pounds for chrissakes. So sick of these celebretards crowing about their fuckin weight loss. Who gives a fuck? There's far more fuckin important things in the world than some shitbag with shrunken fat cells.
She could go all Jocelyn Wildenstein on her face and I would still love her. She is completely fucking batshit insane and lets everyone know in no uncertain terms. She gets out there and shares about it and will happily lend her name to awareness initiatives.
She brought "Wishful Drinking" to the theatre where I work and I would stand in the back every chance I got to listen to her tell her unbelievably messed-up story. She left a trail of glitter wherever she went.
She can wear a tent, or she can fit back into the metal bikini. Carrie Fisher is fucking tops in my book.
It was either on Oxygen or We, back when that channel was somewhat watchable-she had her own interview show that was insanely funny. She interviewed mostly her friends, or other crazy celebs. I wish it were on DVD. So many good interviews: comparing perscription pills with Courtney Love, torturing Geoge Lucas, having pre-Bennifer Affleck macking on her, and last but not least, the shows where she interviewed her parents;separately, of course. God it was fabulous.
No likey the plastic surgery on the face : {
I give her a lot of credit - 54 years old, bipolar (the meds make you gain A TON of weight) and she lost weight eating Jenny Craig rather then having surgery and claiming "a holistic diet, lots of water and exercise" (side eyes Aretha - who I love - but bitch, please). Good for her. If she had her face worked on to tighten up around the edges, who cares? I enjoy her observations on life more then I care about her physical appearance. And if it makes her feel good, even better.
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And pharmaceuticals were invented for me and Liza Minelli. ©2011 BjorkYou.
um...Carrie...lemme break it down foya...You be at a train station, and you need to board a train called YOUTH...Now all you bags be packed and shit...HOWEVER... ZOOM...! that sonnobitch train leave wifout yo' big ol' saggy ass... SAY WHAT????
YOUF DO NOT WANT YOU ASS ANYMO', CARRIE...Life does. Wisdom does. Freedom does. Fun does. Charity does. YOUF DO NOT. Don't want a ho who don't want you. DEAL. YOUF DO NOT WANT YO SAGGY ASS.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Lol @Raul.
I'll preface this by saying I like Carrie Fisher. She's smart, witty, a good actress and writer who can make fun of herself.
I also congratulate her on losing all the weight.
That being said, she does not look good. She looks like a (catatonic with the face work) mental patient in that schlumpy outfit. White bra under a thin black sweater with an uglier big black sweater over it? Ugly winter pants half in her booties?
She reminds me of what Sarah Palin would look like in 15 years, post-nervous breakdown.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
And if there wasn't a before pic people would still call her fat..since you can't count ribs.
B!i!i!iD~
For your health.
Saw her show in NYC, and she was hysterical. Kudos to her for losing the wait. I'm not liking the new face, tho'.
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"It's all fun and farts until somebody gets punched." -MK
"GREEN MILE MOTHERFUCKERS! JOHN COFFEY HELP US!" --urmomma, 8/24/11
She looks pretty good, I must say. I love hilarious, sarcastic, fucked up Carrie.
She was adorable back in the day. She has had a difficult life (bipolar, gay husband, etc.). She is unique and brilliant though. Not your typical Hollywood spawn.
She's looking all kinds of Margo Kidder crazy in the face now that she's dropped a whole side of beef.
I don't believe any of this Jenny Craig or plastic-surgery business.
The shock treatments zapped not only her brain, but all the extra waddles of fat, including her three chin-pockets.
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"okayyy lets not make a goddess out of Maria Shiver now. It's from her bitch face that she is a cunt." - cuntwhore (2011-08-08)
And I love her, even though she mentions being Princess Leia a little too often for my taste.
Well, that's good. I think Jenny Craig is bullshit, though. That processed food is really bad for you and not nutritious.
My SILs claim that losing weight is strictly about calories consumed vs calories burned. PERIOD. While I agree that you can lose weight, it doesn't mean you will look good or be healthy. A diet of Slim-Fast bars, low-fat cheese on reduced-cal Wonder bread and a Lean Cuisine washed down by Diet Pepsi just isn't as good as whole foods, including lots of veggies and yogurt.
Horrible facelift and stringy hair. Whatever. I think she's a hoot, though. Lived an insane life.
That revolutionary microburst technology sounds like the shit. Clean air queefs between your teefs!
Good for her! She looks so much better, but she always comes across harsh to me. Maybe its her low smokers voice?
Aw man Carrie, good for you losing the weight, but why did you have to go fuck up your face like that? You do not look like Carrie Fisher anymore, you look like the little old Greek lady at the Greek restaurant by my house now.
I'm happy that Carrie dropped the chunk (if not to help her health) but I really wish she hadn't fucked with her face. I always pictured her as the kind of broad who didn't give a shit about that sort of thing.
I've never been a fan of Carrie Fisher, but there's no denying that she sure looks fucking great now !
Just say NO to blubber.
Submitted by Athina on Wed, 08/24/2011 - 1:33pm.
Enough with these assholes and their temporary weight loss diets. Jenny Craig does nothing except shove prepackaged, processed shit down your throat. You can lose weight eating portion-controlled meals from McDonald's, too. It doesn't mean the shit is healthy, and it doesn't teach you how to eat properly.
^^^^^PREACH IT!!!! Trufax right there.
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FANTA FANTA, NO COKE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lnRDU4LdZE
Meat Loaf was in the middle of a show when his knees suddenly hit the stage floor like a narcoleptic bat out of hell ~MK
i like carrie but now she looks like just another aging hollywood star trying to hang on to her youth via plastic surgery. ANN CURRIE NEEDS A SWIFT KICK IN THE ASS. HATE HER.
well good on her for losing weight, but Carrie dear, after 50 your face doesn't mysteriously tighten up when you do drop pounds and somehow yours did. let me guess...
and really, that Ann Curry gives me the creeps - bitch is trying WAY too hard and it ain't workin'.
LOL! It's funny...cuz we're (society) really only obsessed with the way that women's bodies are so subjected to constant change. We grow, we shrink, we bleed, we don't bleed, our bodies - and even our faces - can morph with the slightest well-applied pressure and we're so fascinated by that that we take it one step further with the yo-yo ing and the make-up/tattoos and wigs and the weaves and plastic surgery....and the beat goes on...Jenny Craig is just getting at her dollars just like errbuddy else;p
♥ Threadkilla!
Lean Like a Chola, Celebrity Stylez: http://youtu.be/0ZwdYeGSVS0
Amazing how much losing/gaining weight can affect the way you look when you're short...
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Remember, the early bird may catch the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese...
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 08/24/2011 - 12:36pm.
Ya. Reason nomero uno why I no longer watch Today. That bitch just irks me in so many ways.
Enough with these assholes and their temporary weight loss diets. Jenny Craig does nothing except shove prepackaged, processed shit down your throat. You can lose weight eating portion-controlled meals from McDonald's, too. It doesn't mean the shit is healthy, and it doesn't teach you how to eat properly.
I hope Carrie Fisher, Kirstie Allie and Valerie Bertinelli all blow up again to triple their original size. Then they should all do a sitcom together and call it "Fat Fucks in Cleveland."
Eat smaller portions, get off your ass and exercise. THAT IS ALL ANYONE HAS TO DO TO LOSE WEIGHT. People are always looking for that "magic pill" to do it for them.
Jenny Craig is a great way to start, but once you go back to eating regular food, you will gain it all back if you don't learn portion control.
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I'm happy that Ray-J's admitting his guilt. To be fair, he had accomplices OJ Simpson and Ryan Seacrest, but they're both already imprisoned--one in jail, one in the closet.
- IDLYITW
lolol urmomma! I wonder if she tastes like Tabbouleh? Mmmmmmm.
great for losing the weight, but did that really separate and enlarge her eyes? i think not. not that much, anyway.
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The McCanns Did It
Carrie looks awesome and honestly she looks more like herself than she has in decades. I think you all had just gotten used to that fat, squinty-eyed version.
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"If when you die you get a choice between pie heaven and regular heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick but if not mmmboy!"
I'm sure she feels better health-wise after losing that much chunk. There is no secret to healthy living: you gotta eat less, eat more of the good things, and move your lazy ass once in a while without vehicular assistance.
Healthy living tip: ***walk*** to the liquor store, don't drive to get there!
Submitted by Sweetas on Wed, 08/24/2011 - 1:13pm.
That's Carrie Fisher??? Huh? *looks around and whispers* I heard she's one of those late in life Lebanese...not that there's anything wrong with that.
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Oh.my. I love to eat lebanese! Oh.wait.what??!!
My wise female friend accurately summed up the secret to most Jenny Craig-type diet plans: portion control (or fewer calories). Throw some aerobic exercise on top and you'll lose weight.
TEAM SLAP A STICKER ON ANN CURRY'S HELMET!
Submitted by Meatblocks on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 12:16pm.
suckandfuck and raul are like the goofus and gallant of sick humor.
the best.
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I'm not a living legend. I'm just a myth.
She looks fantastic! Good for her- I love Carrie Fisher.
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I'm happy that Ray-J's admitting his guilt. To be fair, he had accomplices OJ Simpson and Ryan Seacrest, but they're both already imprisoned--one in jail, one in the closet.
- IDLYITW
That's Carrie Fisher??? Huh? *looks around and whispers* I heard she's one of those late in life Lebanese...not that there's anything wrong with that.
its easy to lose weight when you have a large amount of money riding on it,
also isnt Jenny craig like those nutrisystem plans, where you eat only their meals losing weight on them is easy because everything is done for you, you don't have to think about what you are eating, just eat the little prepackaged meal they give you, but once you start eating normal foods then you gain everything back, look at Kristie Ally same thing happened to her on Jenny craig
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I wish I had multiple Alts, that way I won't be so lonely when I'm talking to myself
doesn't she look a little bit like your abuelita on the left?
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
would. not. hit.
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011
LOVE Carrie Fisher cause she's so open minded and not afraid to speak her mind.
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Visit my husband's webcomic DUNGEON HORDES at http://www.drunkduck.com/dungeon_hordes
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The Mayans did not predict the end of life in 2012. They did however predict the end of The Today Show and the beginning of a new era of bullshit free mornings.
Thank you ancient wise people!!!