You’re Still Wearing A Mouth Mask, Right?

You still shouldn’t be wearing a mouth mask because of airborne Kardashian kooties. That threat has passed. You should be wearing a mouth mask, because inhaling the mixture of powdery demureness, bronzed elegance and magical lash dust that is coming out of Aubrey O’Day‘s mouth will cause you to hyperventilate and fall into a dream-like coma where kidney bean tits dance in a bubble of clown powder around you. You’re not ready for that since one should go on a fuckery fast 24 hours before doing so.

Leave it to Aubrey HoDayNightWhenever to bring some much-needed star quality and glamour to last night’s tired whore and pony show hosted by the barnyard brigade. Aubrey can deduct the bus fare she paid to get there last night as charity on her tax form, because showing up to that mess definitely counts as an act of philanthropy toward needy famewhores. I swear, Aubrey has more talent, natural beauty and dignity* in one of her implant ripples than all of the Kardashians combined times infinity!

* Yup, saying that Aubrey O’Day has dignity is one of the first signs of famewhore inhalation. Call the Clinica Mobile.