This Is Why Children Should Only Be Mayors On Foursquare
11-year-old Caroline Gonzales won a "Mayor For A Day" contest for kids in her hometown of Forney, TX and her first official order of business was to name a street after her personal Jesus: JUSTIN BIEBER. That STOP sign next to Carline perfectly sums up all of our reactions to this mess.
E! News says that the town came up with the contest, because they're trying to get kids into politics and government. When Caroline was asked WHY?WHY?WHY?WHY? by the people of Forney as they packed their stuff into a U-Haul to move far far away, she said, "Because I really like Justin Bieber. I like his music and I like him. And I thought, why not have a street in my hometown named after my favorite singer?"
If that sign is a permanent thing that will forever live in Forney, then I hope it's on a street that is nothing but a stretch of desolateness full of abandoned warehouses, killed dreams and crack shanties. Because can you imagine living on Justin Bieber Way? Every time you typed in "Justin Bieber Way" in the credit card information box on a porn site you want to join, your boner would die along with your will to go on living.
On ONE positive note, at least Caroline is a kid who is doing stupid kid shit even if it's a nightmare for everybody else. If my 11-year-old self was named Mayor For A Day of Forney, my first order of business would be to change the name of my town to Horney, TX. Shit, that would still be my first order of business. I should've entered that contest.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Thu, 08/18/2011 - 7:51am.
I've been to Forney many times for work... I doubt the locals are digging this shit.
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And you never called?!?
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Thu, 08/18/2011 - 7:51am.
I've been to Forney many times for work... I doubt the locals are digging this shit.
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Local news - literally - just reported that the street sign was stolen. Not only did the dipshits make a new sign and install it, but they also installed a security camera specifically to watch the sign.
She's 11. Who was she suppose to choose? Noam Chomsky?
I've been to Forney many times for work... I doubt the locals are digging this shit.
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011
"your boner would die along with your will to go on living"--why Michael K should win the pulitzer prize
www.hangryhippo.com: Where hunger, anger, media consumption, and satire meet for a snack
Cut the kid some slack. There ain't shit in Forney! Only during September and October is there something interesting..... a huge haunted house. And... that's it.
Submitted by Tyroan on Wed, 08/17/2011 - 4:19pm.
Did she wish Elvis a happy birthday?
No, but she can recite the entire script from Pokémon: The Movie 2000.
At 11, I was embarrassed that I wasn't allowed to listen to any other music than rock n roll and classical music. I didn't know who New Kids on the Block were, or why when attending a sleep-over at a friend's house, every sheet/pillowcase/sleepingbag were covered in these men's faces. Now that I'm an old lady (26), it makes me happy to look back and know that I might have been a nerd, but everyone else was a complete fucking toolbag.
I still don't know who Justin Beiber is, and have never heard her music.
Did she wish Elvis a happy birthday?
actually i think this is adorable. if i were her back in the day, you can bet there'd be a new kids on the block avenue.
May she be tortured for the rest of her school days for that.
I'm proud to say that at 11, I was a total music snob who wouldn't listen to any pop music. I knew it was bad and prepackaged, so I just didn't listen to any of it. So my first beloved band ended up being the Flaming Lips.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by sinjin on Wed, 08/17/2011 - 11:19am.
Submitted by Slurpee on Wed, 08/17/2011 - 10:03am.
Thanks. if anybody deserves a street named for them, it's MK!
"I've had an awful lot of lovers ... And a lot of awful lovers." - Shirley MacLaine
Submitted by Andrei on Wed, 08/17/2011 - 10:39am.
Dude. At that age, you don't have a favorite singer. You have a favorite singer that all other 11 year olds like. In other words... she liked him because her friends did. I don't even remember what I listened to at that age. I probably listened to a lot, but didn't idolize anyone or care about it that much.
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Exactly. I listened to New Kids on the Block. Not because they were great musicians, in fact I realize now that I'm old that their music was awful. I liked them because my friends did, and they liked them because The Machine pushed them onto pre-teen girls.
What an awful age. You're budding sexually while your male classmates still behave like 5-year-olds, hideous teen idols are forced onto you and your character is so weak that you're ripe for advertising exploitation.
I feel bad for this generation of girls. At least NKOTB had testosterone. Bieber is even worse than Donny Osmond.
http://smellmybutt.tumblr.com/
hey now! Big time Donny lover here! Lol
Been lurking here for about a mth, and reading all of these crazy ass comments. So, first time DListed poster!
Got to say, some of you guys are hilarious as hell!! And of course, MK is da' man! (umm.....)
Hello to everyone, be gentle with me! Lol
That's a great avie OurMissC :D
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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Wed, 08/17/2011 - 11:04am.
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Why are you doing this?
Submitted by Andrei on Wed, 08/17/2011 - 10:49am.
Heathen.. maybe she did and they patted her on the head and said, "Maybe tomorrow, hon." xD
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No, the only patronizing thing was investing an 11 year old with authority she was ill equipped to handle & subjecting her to ridicule for it. The point (since you missed it) was the people in Forney shouldn't have had the stupid contest in the first place.
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"And 9/11 ain't nothing compared to what's happening on the buffet line at Sizzler." MK
I've been driving around my godforsaken down ALL MORNING looking for Justin Bieber party supplies. NONE to be found. Maybe I should move to this chick's area.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
Submitted by heathen on Wed, 08/17/2011 - 10:40am.
Everybody's ragging on the 11 year old, but it had to be the adults who decided on having a stupid "Mayor for a Day" contest which actually carried some actual authority. WTF did they expect? They're lucky she didn't sign an edict making all toys, CDs & candy free.
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What? Free candy and toys. That's sounds like a better idea to me.
Heathen.. maybe she did and they patted her on the head and said, "Maybe tomorrow, hon." xD
Can I just tell you how much I hate Justin Biebitch and everything she stands for?
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www.charitywater.org
www.animalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Everybody's ragging on the 11 year old, but it had to be the adults who decided on having a stupid "Mayor for a Day" contest which actually carried some actual authority. WTF did they expect? They're lucky she didn't sign an edict making all toys, CDs & candy free.
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"And 9/11 ain't nothing compared to what's happening on the buffet line at Sizzler." MK
Dude. At that age, you don't have a favorite singer. You have a favorite singer that all other 11 year olds like. In other words... she liked him because her friends did. I don't even remember what I listened to at that age. I probably listened to a lot, but didn't idolize anyone or care about it that much.
If my 11-year-old self was named Mayor For A Day of Forney, my first order of business would be to change the name of my town to Horney, TX. Shit, that would still be my first order of business. I should've entered that contest.
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*falls over* ...I would move to Horney, TX!
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 08/17/2011 - 9:51am.
Don't worry everyone, it's Texas, that sign will be shot up in no time. Trust.
*drives to Texas with arsenal*
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Lol, Cupcake
It`s safe here. Unless you`re talking 4th of July, when every drunk asshole decides to shoot their gun in the air to "celebrate", and the bullet comes through your bedroom ceiling, bounces of your vacuum-cleaner and gets stuck in your wall, while you sit on the computer.
Yes. That happened.
And then your landlord tries to charge you for fixing the roof.
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"I also have felt the nose heat of the man meat."
SFRB, 04/26/11
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http://www.youtube.com/user/beeper246#p/a/u/2/BrO86m4qAEs
Raul...lmao.
off topic: Sucky...just saw the footage of michele bachmann again...ROTFLMAO @ TEWER from yesterday.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
And if her goal as mayor would have been to build a new animal shelter or soup kitchen we would have never been reading about her today.
isn't foursquare that stupid "location" shit on FB, that tells the world exactly where and what time you check into a certain place?
Fuck that. I have it disabled.
Submitted by christine the hoff on Wed, 08/17/2011 - 10:04am.
Guest. yes!!
but never that mormon bastard donny osmond.
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LOL...not in a million....oof!
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Submitted by fuzzyslippers on Wed, 08/17/2011 - 9:32am.
Okay, what the fuck is foursquare. Damn kids, coming up with all this newfangled shit! *shakes cane*
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Hahahaha! I have no idea either! *takes a sip of metamucil*
Guest. yes!!
but never that mormon bastard donny osmond.
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Oh God ,why don't you go sit under a rainbow and write a poem, Kyle.
OurMissC:
Great avie!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by christine the hoff on Wed, 08/17/2011 - 9:33am.
I used to have a cardboard poster of him in my room. *dates self*
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
She's 11. That kid Jesse Slaughter who told everyone on YouTube to get fucked and she was going to "pop a glock and make a brain slushee" was 11. I don't mind reading about kids being kids. Jesse's dad died I read this am, guess that's why I'm thinking of her. He also beat her up and she's in foster care all cleaned up. Probably likes Justin Bieber (ha, doubt that)
They could make the intersecting street Selena Gomez Blvd. and we can all stick our heads in the oven.
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Don't worry everyone, it's Texas, that sign will be shot up in no time. Trust.
*drives to Texas with arsenal*
Children should be seen and not heard.
It would be funny if Justin Bieber Way was the most crime-ridden part of the city.
"Did you hear about that carjacking that turned into a deadly shoot-out?"
"No, Man! Where was it?"
"Justin Bieber Way."
"Fuck. I go out of my way to avoid that hood."
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Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
here's an idea: Have him there in the intersection for a cutting the ribbon ceremony.. but first we steal the Stop sign :::screeching tires::: splat.
Hopefully that sign is just for the day. I don't know why but Biebs makes me stabby.
"I've had an awful lot of lovers ... And a lot of awful lovers." - Shirley MacLaine
"That STOP sign next to Carline perfectly sums up all of our reactions to this mess."
FUCKING LOL. Caroline.........STOP
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
Children are stupid.
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You got a lot of money, but you can't afford the freeway
Hey stupid kid made mayor for a day, why not cancel school or make the ice cream truck give out free shit?
KIDS TODAY!
*turns off hearing aid*
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My daughter, who just turned 12 yrs old, heard about this on TV and her reaction was "What a stupid girl! Why couldn't she name the street after a policeman or fireman who died on duty or a fallen soldier or some sort of hero or a victim of crime." LOL But then again she has complete disdain for Beiber and his "Beliebers" .........
Hear that crash? That's property values dropping. (*shakes head)
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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)
rocklobster -- I want to smack her with the sign, too -- you are not alone, LOL!
I heard about this on the local news last night (I live in the viewing area) and all I could do is laugh. My dad just shook his head in utter disgust.
The funniest part about the story (to me) was that they were saying that they had to make sure all of the police knew about the change, because if they wrote someone a ticket and put the old street name on it then the city couldn't get the money because the info was wrong. Can you imagine being a cop and having to put "Justin Bieber Way" on a ticket? LMFAO
It's always an excellent idea with such amazing results when we let 11 year olds make such HUGE decisions by themselves.
*farts and swings with UBF*
Your tax dollars at work.
Is it wrong to want to smack this girl with that sign?
Maybe I'm just a grump