Afternoon Crumbs

August 16, 2011 / Posted by:

Shelley Duvall looks like a new kind of fucking awful! (Sidenote: Apologies to the real Shelley Duvall, because she’s probably digging for fallen UFO satellites in the middle of the desert and doesn’t need me comparing her to the likes of Jennifer Love Hewitt) – ICYDK

BREAKING: The sad hapa hobo took a bath – Lainey Gossip

Because you’ve already seen Heidi Klum in a bikini for six days in a row, here’s another set to add to the pile – Hollywood Tuna

The fist of Xenu killed JLo’s marriage and not the mighty fist of Skeletor’s wrist dick – The Superficial

When you’re having dinner with a bland bitch like Josh Hartnett, sometimes you have to do golden showers with yourself to spice things up – (NSFW) Drunken Stepfather

Why does the ass-to-ass scene from Requiem for a Dream come to mind? – The Daily What

Salma Hayek’s world-saving chichis in Allure – The Berry

Adam Levine’s bare torso looks like the kind of mural you’d find at a low-funded city zoo – Celebitchy

Miley Cyrus’ knees look like fetuses (No, I’m not writing this while giving mouth-to-bong. Unfortunately.) – Popoholic

Chrissy Crocker’s gay porno dreams are actually coming true – OMG Blog

Arnold Schwarzenegger munching on an ice cream cone like it was between the legs of a Guatemalan maidCelebslam

Now for a palate cleanser – Popsugar

Three words: Ferrets in costumes – Cityrag

Shaq is officially bored – Videogum

Today’s dick print is provided by SealSOW

Baby Huey’s bulge might be a lot more tingly to my parts if I haven’t already seen the real thing – Hollywood Rag

Rich bitch likes being a rich bitch – I’m Not Obsessed

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