...The Hell Is Going On Here Exactly?
Here's Halle Berry celebrating her 45th birthday in Malibu yesterday by getting a b-hole full of clothed lady clit. Or maybe Halle's friend tried to Heimlich the fountain of youth (aka blended dolphin placentas) out of her stomach since that's obviously what she swallows to stay looking like that. That must be it, because every ho wants a perfect body like Halle's, obviously.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Halle is 45 and has the body of a big-tittied fetus who does crunches in the womb all day. Pretty much every site that posted these pictures slobbered at their finger tips about how Halle has a body that most hos half her age would sell their nipples for. I'm not impressed. You too would have a body like that if you spent your days tensing up your stomach while bitching at Gabriel Aubry over the phone, and spent your nights running from an orgasm-blocking Marmadevil.
Besides, did Halle bounce on the double black dildo machine (aka the elliptical) for half of a Lisa Lisa song yesterday like I did? I thought not. Halle couldn't have, because she was slacking off with her daughter and Olivier Martinez at the beach! Lazy bitch is lazy!


*Stares at Halle's abs, then stares at Mozzarella alla Carrozza sandwich in hands* Sigh...
Let me be clear, I'm definitely only asking because I'm jealous but did Halle have a boob job?
*****************************************************
"Never ascribe to malice that which can adequately be explained by incompetence."
- Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)
Fuckin Godess.
I wouldnt mind switching places with that chick in the black tank;)
__________________
As for the peen looking bump I'm gonna pretend I didn't see that.
Halle is looking that good cuz bitch is into them foetus and umbilical cord dumplings with baby deer blood and soy sauce with a squeeze of lime.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dumplings_(film)
That movie is soooo creepy that i have seen it 12 times.
Ugh! Double post!
It seems a little dangerous to throw someone by all those rocks. If that were me, i'd be yelling, "No means no!" over and over again.
I have a girlfriend who is always all over me in a pseudo lesbian way (she isn't really),once she was mildly drunk and came over when me and my BF were in hot tub, dismissed him by literally pushing him away and tried to take a nap on my boobs. I never understood the fascination with boobs, particularly if you have a pair yourself!
I have a girlfriend who is always all me in a pseudo lesbian way (she isn't really),once she was mildly drunk and came over when me and my BF were in hot tub, dismissed him by literally pushing him away and tried to take a nap on my boobs. I never understood the fascination with boobs, particularly if you have a pair yourself!
How much do I need to spend to get her abs?
*counting pennies..*
Submitted by Zorba-the-Geek on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 4:47pm.
I think Halle's bisexual and that's her girlfriend. Whaddya think?
**********
The rumour is that she's really a lesbian who's been hiring beards for the sake of her career. X17 got some pictures of her holding hands and cuddling up to that same woman right after she split with Gabriel. I'm starting to think the rumours have credence.
I think the labial protrusion in the last thumb is just tampon string. Better it's in a questionable lump than dangling out the side of her bikini bottoms.
Was she just tackled by Steven Tyler?
__________________________________________________
"Two whores don't make a right"-- M.K.
"Any guy who values stick thin and young over smarts and personality isn't worth it and has NOTHING interesting to say anyway."-- Mrs. Kravitz
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 12:27pm.
wtf are you people talking about? The only pic of her ass is went she is bent over, and it is hard to tell what "shape" her ass is in that position. Standing up, yes, we'd be able to see if it is flat.
*******
Someone on here had a link that showed what she looked like without the sarong on ... it was on this exact day. Shit looks pretty droopy.
Submitted by cocoebert on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:16pm.
Kate Hudson has a great bum
I've been struggling mightily to sit through "Le Divorce." It's really dreadful on most levels. I watch it in starts and stops of increasingly shorter intervals.
Anyhoo, Hudson's bum is the only thing positive I can say about her role in the movie. She or the directors know it, too, 'cause they focus on it.
Maybe that's Adrienne Brody?
To those saying she has a flat ass, plllllease spare me...she looks hot, cheese and all because the rack is holding up juuust fine
I think Halle's bisexual and that's her girlfriend. Whaddya think?
This woman was blessed and I think it's more than just working out at the gym. She has good genes.
Of course Halle's body is amazing, she doesn't have anything else to do but go to the gym. She doesn't have a real job like the rest of us.
If I only had to work 3 months out of a year and get paid a million papers, I'd have a stunnung assed body, too. Hell, I'm 2 years behind her and I don't look half bad, even if I am a voluotuous babe.
Halle looks great and she can act, but bitch is bat-shit crazy...
If Gabriel would dare to frolic on a beach with Nahla and another woman, he would experience hell from Halle.
Submitted by clairey claire on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 2:09pm.
Are her boobs real? If so she can't have breastfed surely.
***********
No. She went from a barely there 34B to a 36C early on in her career.
Are her boobs real? If so she can't have breastfed surely.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"It's always funny until somebody gets hurt-then it's fucking hilarious": The late great Bill Hicks
The flappy ass wasn`t in one of the pics up there, but in one of the links someone posted. And it did look kinda out of shape...(like mine)
--------------------------------------------------
"I also have felt the nose heat of the man meat."
SFRB, 04/26/11
--------------------------------------------------
http://www.youtube.com/user/beeper246#p/a/u/2/BrO86m4qAEs
@Bowchickawawa:My first thought, upon seeing the "bump" in Halle's crotch, was it's probably a piercing.
I'm certainly not seeing a "flabby ass", as has been mentioned. Her backside isn't shown at all, unless one considers the photo of her bending over.
I only have this to say:
1. I am a straight female, and those boobs are making me horny as hell. I just want to roll around in them.
2. Wonder if Lisa Bonet has seen these pics. Hell I wonder if Jason Momoa has seen these pics.
3. The kid is not cute. Maybe it will be someday.
For the people saying her ass need toning: You're seriously saying that from that bent over angle you can tell whats going on with her ass?
with all due respect, you jealous haters, kiss MY ass. You're all full of shit.
This woman is flawless, she puts 20 year olds to shame! And I don't really even care for her, but she has an amazing body, Nobody can deny her that.
@ sinjin: Nothing flat about this:
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zKN0XecoTgQ/TbVYrGFpzFI/AAAAAAAABXU/jdY7HAQo1_...
hate this crazy bitch for making it seem that it's possible to look this good at 45.
fuck her.
im sorry...i agree halle is a nutjob, but there's absolutely nothing wrong with her body...
_____________________________________________
Charisma, Uniqueness, Nerve and Talent...
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:23pm.
Submitted by Bowchickawawa on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:17pm.
I only said that it looks like one.
Not sure what penises you've been looking at but, actually, no it doesn't.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Not sure why you are being so tough on me. Have I done something to you in the past that is the basis for this?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"And people try to tell me that God wasn't high on the good shit when he made this place" -by angel_i
Can't hate, she looks fantastic.
She's crazy, but her body is amaaaazing
...My darling can't you see
My heart sounds just for you my dear...
Submitted by Bowchickawawa on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:17pm.
I only said that it looks like one.
Not sure what penises you've been looking at but, actually, no it doesn't.
I'd love to have her body even with her "flabby ass." Men would much rather fuck that than the sticks we see.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:08pm.
Submitted by Bowchickawawa on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 12:56pm.
Have I slipped into some alterna-universe where nobody notices or comments on what looks like a tiny peen sticking out of her crotch in the very last photo?
No you've just slipped into an alterna-universe where nobody is dumb enough to think inner labia = penis.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There's nothing "inner" about the round nub sticking out of her crotch. I do realize it is not actually a peen as I have seen them before and know where they are located. I only said that it looks like one. Even if everyone was as smart as you, I am still surprised it doesn't even get a mention in this crowd.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"And people try to tell me that God wasn't high on the good shit when he made this place" -by angel_i
I would defend her, but I think the pictures speak for themselves. She has a great body for any age.
Who cares if she has imperfections...that's called being a human being.
I'm pretty sure that the people saying that she's not holding up well, are just as imperfect as they expect her NOT to be.
At the same time, she's a celebrity, she asked and has benefited from a life of exposure and being judged, so thus, she's getting judged.
Probably from people that are being hypocritical, but eh, oh well.
Kate Hudson has a great bum (could be NSFW): http://www.picpiggy.com/bank/kate_hudson_bum_shots-1271367602.jpg
Submitted by Bowchickawawa on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 12:56pm.
Have I slipped into some alterna-universe where nobody notices or comments on what looks like a tiny peen sticking out of her crotch in the very last photo?
No you've just slipped into an alterna-universe where nobody is dumb enough to think inner labia = penis.
Halle's ass just needs toning,it's not that far gone. Brooke Burke's ass does not exist, flat as my desktop.(IMHO)
***********************************************
"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)
It's like The Picture of Dorian Gray, except Halle's ass is the picture.
She doesn't age, but her ass does.
@ TBH
Exactly - Tara is just a lazy bitch who tried to do everything surgically with disastrous results. Pock-marked, lipoed belly, Frankenboobs, and she has those gross skinny, yet flabby legs. Exercise dammit!
Are people REALLY criticizing her body?! I know she's a mega bitch, but she's UNDENIABLY attractive and in great shape. SMH.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Douchechill!
Submitted by Anonymoussss on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 12:44pm.
She needs to hook up with Jennifer Aniston's trainer.
For real.
Dat ass is just not on point.
I used to think she was in shape because she worked out a lot, but clearly not. Either that or she does work out, but only ever does sit ups.
Have I slipped into some alterna-universe where nobody notices or comments on what looks like a tiny peen sticking out of her crotch in the very last photo?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"And people try to tell me that God wasn't high on the good shit when he made this place" -by angel_i
After seeing Tara Reid's bikini body (I know not a good example) but really whatever minor flaws Halle has are insignificant. Now Tara Reid that's a different story.
Oh to be gorgeous and frolicking at the beach...Of course I'd rather frolic with my husband than a chick. JSing.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Halle has some lucious boobies. *drool*
She needs to hook up with Jennifer Aniston's trainer.
Her little girl is not cute. There , i said it. There are a million mixed kids out there cuter than Nahla, or whatever her fucking name is. She looks like a little bitch, too.
And Halle lost major points with that bitch-act she pulled about custody a while back. Made her look like a fucking psycho.
"I also have felt the nose heat of the man meat."
SFRB, 04/26/11
--------------------------------------------------
http://www.youtube.com/user/beeper246#p/a/u/2/BrO86m4qAEs
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 12:27pm.
***********
Scroll down:
http://mediatakeout.com/50462/actress_halle_berry_just_turned_45_____and...
****************************************************
Oh! well cellulite is a bitch :/
__________________________________________________
"If I can't be my own, i'd feel better dead"- Nutshell