It’s the Saturday slows again, so instead of writing an 800-word post on how I spent my afternoon vacuuming out my refrigerator, I’m giving you these pictures of Becks wearing the douche version of a bathing cap while dipping his nipples and grabbing at his shit in Malibu. Or I guess I could’ve posted about Craig Field from Melrose Place getting married to a reality host robot. Or how that nekkid Zac Efron picture you fapped to wasn’t real (an orgasm via lies and manipulation is the worst) Or I could’ve posted pictures of St. Angie and the twin messiahs in London. But nope. Becks’ penny nipples win. Every time.
While Posh is off getting her body pap-ready by having all of the internal organs you need to carry a child removed, wrapped in gauze and stored in a wooden box full of cedar chips, Becks played in the water with his boys today. Becks’ body has so many religious tattoos that he looks like my abuelita’s prayer wall. All he’s missing is a tattoo of Footprints on his right tit.
Oh, and I threw in those boring pictures of Angie and her holy family, because not one piece of clothing on her skeleton ass body is black. This should be noted.