Satsuki Michell Is My Hero
If InTouch (via Celebitchy) is telling the truth, then Daniel Craig learned the hard way that before dropping your longtime piece for another piece, you should cancel all of your credit cards and change the locks on everything you own that has a lock. Because if your longtime piece is a disciple of Blu Cantrell's Church of Getting Even, then you'll be left with a whole lot of airline miles and an AMEX bill thicker than Skeletor's wrist thick peen. A source says that Daniel's ex-girlfriend Satsuki Mitchell did just that when she figured out that James Bond dumped her for Rachel Weisz.
The source says that Satsuki lived with Daniel while he shot Dream House with Rachel and she knew something in the milk was Rachel's pubes when he didn't come home from the set one day. The source went on to say that Satsuki "was frantically calling, texting and emailing him, but he was probably with Rachel and not answering." Satsuki didn't get revenge by going down to the set to beat on both of their asses. Satsuki got revenge by using Daniel's credit cards, which he gave her permission to use, to rack up $1 million in charges.
I would've loved to see the look on James Bond's face when he opened up his credit card bills. It was probably the same face made by the clerk at the check cashing place in the mini mall when Satsuki threw down all of Daniel's credit cards and barked at him to call in the Brink's trucks, because what he's got in his drawer is not going to cover the cash advance she's about to take out.
Rachel might have gotten a wedding ring from Daniel, but I'm sure Satsuki bought herself something better: A YACHT! A yacht that she named "Thanks To Rachel's Pussy," of course.


i seriously dont get the scorn for her here-i wonder had it been a man to have taken a famous actresses money (yes both sexes can behave like that) the attitude would be different-she would be told she deserved it etc.
if i were in the same position yeah-if a guy broke my heart i'd fucking break the bank-i wouldnt spend that money on myself because every time i saw those posession its would remind me of what happened i would give the money away but the idea that money is more important than a persons feelings is fucking ludacrus.
totally with Satsuki here what he did was shitty end of.
People DC and RW used to date 20 years ago, so maybe there is more to this story
I dont care for DC, but who is to know maybe he broke it off with Satsuki and she was mad and decided to get revenge, who knows?
I would be pissed after 12 years he dumps me, and then soon after he gets married, apparently he was a decent guy and let her keep the credit cards to help her out
"I will pee myself today and when someone asks, "what is that smell?", I will happily tell them Veluptuous by KK!" Urmomma
Yeah, because there's never been a woman on the planet who has accused someone of cheating, gotten revenge and been wrong. Pretty weak "evidence" (aka an anonymous source) for everybody to be so certain how it all went down.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
Rachel Weisz is a pretentious, ugly wart and I hate when she does an American accent in films. I read that she was still with her dude at the time, but who knows.
It would be cool to be wrong here but this relationshop is doomed, I think. He was living with this lady for over 12 years and she was married. Although, I beleive she left her director husband before getting involved with Bond.
But I agree 100% that people do not "steal" someone's love. That is just a delusional fantasy. At least most of the time, anyway.
It would be cool to be wrong here but this relationshop is doomed, I think. He was living with this lady for over 12 years and she was married. Although, I beleive she left her director husband before getting involved with Bond.
But I agree 100% that people do not "steal" someone's love. That is just a delusional fantasy. At least most of the time, anyway.
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 5:27pm.
Submitted by clairey claire on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 4:26pm.
I want to like this move..I really do. But I can't help thinking 'have some self respect.' He didn't commit a crime, but she did.
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Nope, not a crime, since she was authorized to use the cards by him. Over spending when you have authorization from the card holder, is not a crime.
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Ah. Yeah you're right, I missed that bit. OK, well fuck him then, dumbass shoulda cancelled his card.
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"It's always funny until somebody gets hurt-then it's fucking hilarious": The late great Bill Hicks
I can't see the appeal of Daniel Craig.
And that's a shitty excuse for a moustache.
Get paper bitch!
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I hope she used his AmEx to shack up at the Peninsula for a few days with a hotter, younger guy. Lots of room service with Champs. Then she's both spending his money and returning the favor.
'Course, while the younger guy got lots of wild, urgent sex, she was crying, cursing, and checking her messages during most of it.
"He looks like he'd go all Christian Bale on your ass if you put one lump of sugar in his tea instead of two."
HAHAHAHAHAHAH
But seriously folks, why you wanna go apeshit on this guy when you don't know the whole story? Sounds like she got a raw deal but you never know - takes two to tango.
Having a shopping spree with someone else's money, though? I can get on board with that!
Double post.
Ummm, yeah, he cheated and that's crappy. But I don't get why people (usually, but not always, women) think they can live off a rich partner for years and then take even more money as a parting "gift." Sats should be grateful that his coin and his connections allowed her to have a fancy lifestyle for all those years and score a great job. So he cheated - write a nasty note on his wall in lipstick, take your stuff and go. Maybe they can't prove in a court of law that she stole, since she technically had permission to use his credit card, but I definitely consider it stealing. Ugh.
I love tales of scorned women reeking a controlled revenge on their spouses. My favourite heroine is Lady Sarah Graham-Moon.
She kicked the evening off by pouring paint over her husband's BMW, then proceeded to chop the sleeves off his 3 cashmere coats and 32 (yes, 32) Savile Row suits, winding up her playful retribution by distributing the expensive contents of his well-stocked cellar to doorsteps throughout the village.
Point made, no physical harm done.
Submitted by TelevisedRevolution on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 7:38pm.
I have to admit that I would give him head for hours.
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Ugh, I'm such a lazy lay. While I can suck the Tootsie Pop all the way to the center, um, peen isn't the same thing (ditto the Bat Cave).
Vindictive but funny. Sounds like an unclean break.
"Satsuki got revenge by using Daniel's credit cards, which he gave her permission to use, to rack up $1 million in charges."
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Ahahahahahaha, after reading months of "Goldigger Fail" stories by MK, this one had me laughing hysterically. Lesson learned Mr. Bond - cancel the cards and the line of credit BEFORE you hit the new piece, just to be on the safe side.
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What's as equally as funny to me is a hillbilly Santa Claus jumping up from his motorized sleigh to whoop a trick with pepaw fists of fury! It's a win/win. MK 7/21/11
I have to admit that I would give him head for hours.
Submitted by Bree on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 4:28pm" ...With that being said, my mother is a serial cheater and that shit disgusts me too. She cheated on my dad after 15 years with my stepdad, she cheated on my stepdad after 10 years with her new boyfriend she met on facebook, shit is just getting ridiculous. I understand if you slip up and cheat, shit happens, but when you're a serial cheater it just means you have no respect for anybody else or yourself."
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Can I just imagine that your mom is Alexis Carrington? Get it, Mom!
And fuck that guy for beating on you.
Submitted by cocoebert on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 2:48pm.
He is a butterface if there ever was one.
I was always hot for Le Chiffre anyway. Hmmm, Mads Mikkelsen- yes please!!
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Yes, Mads Mikkelsen! Have you seen that Danish trilogy of thugs that he was in? He starred in the second one (the name escapes me, and I don't feel like looking it up). And that other one he was in about the Dutch guys who fought against the Nazis? And that man can ACT. Just ignore that "Clash of the Titans" shit he did so that he could make a ton of money.
Submitted by littlemama on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 5:39pm.
If I had taken my ex's credit card when he left I may have been able to swing a snickers and a coke.
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LOLOLOLOL! I know what you mean. In order to have been able to swing that on my ex's card I first would have had to pay his bill.
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Submitted by El Bastardo on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 11:39am.
You're only bisexual if someone rams a bottle of water up your ass and you cum. FACT.
Submitted by littlemama on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 5:39pm.
If I had taken my ex's credit card when he left I may have been able to swing a snickers and a coke.
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Lmao! Maybe it's because I'm a perpetually hungry college student, but that sounds good to me.
Maybe DC should send the bill to Rachel she turned out to be really expensive lmao.
Isn't he gay?
Submitted by Stan Hooper on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 3:15pm.
I have a feeling he sent the repo man to get the stuff because all he has to do is call in the fraud charges and its over for this gal.
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Not if what MK says is true and she had permission to use them - by that I guess he means Daniel was the primary cardholder and she had one too, but the bills went to DC. In those circumstances, she can use the card as much as she wants and it's not fraud.
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If I had taken my ex's credit card when he left I may have been able to swing a snickers and a coke.
Submitted by clairey claire on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 4:26pm.
I want to like this move..I really do. But I can't help thinking 'have some self respect.' He didn't commit a crime, but she did.
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Nope, not a crime, since she was authorized to use the cards by him. Over spending when you have authorization from the card holder, is not a crime.
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Submitted by El Bastardo on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 11:39am.
You're only bisexual if someone rams a bottle of water up your ass and you cum. FACT.
Daniel tries to put on that stony face when they are together but he looks pussy whipped. Rachel looks like she's getting dicked down real good but once that wears off, I think she'll get bored. He looks boring. His body and his dick is the most exciting thing about him. Can that last 30 years?
蜘龍====================龍蜘
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ubmitted by clairey claire on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 4:26pm.
I can't help thinking 'have some self respect.' He didn't commit a crime, but she did. Much better to walk away with your head held high and jump into bed with somebody hotter and more talented. Also, if she didn't actually need the money, just makes her look greedy.
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THIS^^^^^^
After so many years together, he got what he deserved. He should've done the gentleman thing and broken it off before getting involved with someone else.
Snideychick sez:
From the tone of these posts it sounds like there are a lot of scorned D-listed bitches (count me in that group)!
Satsuki: GIT THAT MONEY!
And for some reason I feel that Rachel will be the one to bail on this marriage. She just seems like an opportunistic bitch like that.
Fuck jewelry... get GOLD BARS! And then bury them somewhere where no one can find them.
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I guess it's best to end a relationship the same way you start it: absolutely fucking tanked. MK 6/11
Submitted by SpiceDong on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 4:19pm.
People said Branjelina wouldn't last and we are still being tortured by them and their followers YEARS later!
Relationships run out of gas and end...that is fact. No one steals anyone from anybody unless there's a major problem already there and the cheating party has emotionally checked out already.
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I appreciate you mentioning that. A few years ago, I broke up with my boyfriend of three years and instantly started dating a new guy. I never cheated on the previous boyfriend, but everyone assumed because I started dating someone new so quickly that I MUST have been cheating. Look how quick I was to leave a three year relationship, right?
The fact is, there were MANY problems going on there (including physical abuse) and it really pissed me off to see so many people judging me so harshly when, if they really knew the truth, they probably would have had the sense to leave sooner if they were me. I guess in those situations, you find out who your true friends are.
With that being said, my mother is a serial cheater and that shit disgusts me too. She cheated on my dad after 15 years with my stepdad, she cheated on my stepdad after 10 years with her new boyfriend she met on facebook, shit is just getting ridiculous. I understand if you slip up and cheat, shit happens, but when you're a serial cheater it just means you have no respect for anybody else or yourself.
I want to like this move..I really do. But I can't help thinking 'have some self respect.' He didn't commit a crime, but she did. Much better to walk away with your head held high and jump into bed with somebody hotter and more talented. Also, if she didn't actually need the money, just makes her look greedy.
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"It's always funny until somebody gets hurt-then it's fucking hilarious": The late great Bill Hicks
People said Branjelina wouldn't last and we are still being tortured by them and their followers YEARS later!
Relationships run out of gas and end...that is fact. No one steals anyone from anybody unless there's a major problem already there and the cheating party has emotionally checked out already.
I will reserve my judgment until all details come to light because we don't know if Satsuki was actually a bitch on wheels or cheated on him first, and Rachel was just the incentive he needed to get out of a relationship that was going nowhere...after all he LIVED with this woman for years and never felt like marrying her like he did with Rachel after a few months. He is just an idiot for not cancelling all common stuff he had with his GF before kicking her to the curb. And she just proved he was right in not seeing her as marriage material if indeed she pulled this shady stunt.
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"When you open up your vagina to a billionaire and a baby comes out, it is your responsibility to get as much money out of that motherfucker as possible!"
I hope Satsuki also took everything in the house that was worth anything as part of her "Fuck You and Your Whore" settlement.
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Taking crazy things seriously is a serious waste of time."
— Haruki Murakami
Good for her. Buy GOLD gurrrl!!
I still would, tho. And yes Snowy, he is a hot piece!
Good for her. God if only my ex had money I would have done the same damn thing.
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You really have to side clap and pucker for a piece who can stand next to a white feather and out-gay it. - MK 8/3/2011
This bitch is awesome!!!
I do love Rachel though, just saw a screening of The Whistleblower last night...amazing movie
Good for her.
I like Rachel Weitz as an actress, but she she comes across as pretty full of herself in interviews. She also has a history of hooking up with directors and actors who already have girlfriends or are married. Karma's a bitch. I hope one day she gets dumped like Satsuki was. . .
Ca-Ching!
(973) Jersey Strong
Woo-hoo for her.
You could totally spend a million dollars shopping, and not just on jewelry.
First, $1 million USD is only $614,062 pounds.
Also, high end department stores are super expensive and sell runway couture ($25,000 dresses), and ultra luxe body products (La Prairie face cream retails at over $1000 for less than one ounce, and the deluxe version with a Swarovski crystal bottle is $3000).
High end restaurants- think $10,000 for one dinner with girlfriends, including champagne by the bottle, cocktails, and tip.
Expensive champagne (to take home), art, decor for your new post-break-up apartment, trip to a luxury spa, gifts for friends, going to the best hair stylist, botox treatment, mani and pedi at the same salons that serves Victoria Beckham and the royals....
Blahniks are $700 to $900 a pair.
Of course there's the aforementioned jewelry.
A Patek Philippe watch (or any high end grand complication watch) will cost at least $240,000.
Plus, she could have bought a luxury car- Bentleys average $300,000; Range Rovers are about $100K to $150K.
It's easy to spend a million bucks, especially if you know where to shop.
Craig can't have her locked up if he gave her permission to use the card (that's the part I love). He may not necessarily have a civil case against her. He could argue he never intended this kind of usage, but he did give her an unlimited card and permission to spend.
Sucks for him I guess.
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An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.
If that bitch didn't buy a fucking house with that million dollars in credit cards then she ripped herself off, otherwise Good Going Girl!
蜘龍====================龍蜘
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(='.'=)
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Diamonds are a ripoff. If you buy a $100,000 ring in a jewelry store today you would be lucky to resale it tomorrow for $25,000.
Buy a house if possible. Even cars or boats have better lasting value than diamonds. Diamonds are a scam.
I have no idea how much money DC has, but money is money - he can always make more. If this were me, I'd take naked pictures of him for future use, delete his computer's hard drive, fuck up all of his favourite things.
You know, make it hurt for real for real.
In the words of Mo'Nique "YASSSS BABY!!!!"
Daniel's about to star in double-o bankrupt soon
Good for her.
oh, yeah - jewelry store. I'd send him a couple messages & then head the f*** out. Don't forget to get cash.
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As useless as a saggy pair of tits
"Submitted by Fucking_Classy on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 2:53pm.
To the folks who say "how can you spend 1 million that fast?", the answer is simple: jewelry."
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Cars, boats, and a lake house. Cheebus, I wish I could find a rich dude that would cheat on me instead of these broke-ass jackasses. Clearly I'm not dating the "right" kind of assholes.
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"I'd rather regret the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done." -Lucille Ball-sy
I have a feeling he sent the repo man to get the stuff because all he has to do is call in the fraud charges and its over for this gal.
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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie