No, OctoMom Will Not Have Sex With You
No, this is not a still of a lost scene from Splice. This is OctoMom on the cover of the always elegant Steppin' Out Magazine. In the interview with Steppin' Out, Octo continues to talk about how her vagina only opens for baby heads and she isn't interested in anything sex related. Octo was married for a while and couldn't even tell you if her husband's dick situation was curved, cut or mushroom-headed. Octo has no idea, because she barely spent time with his peen. Octo would rather get intimate with an IVF needle than with a peen and she's alright with that.
"I can tell you that I never touched him physically. It was a different type of marriage.That's all I want to say about it. I'm the kind of person who can be with a man for years and never touch him. My mind is not wired that way. I don't need that kind of thing. People need sex, but I don't .. I have zero sexual interest.
And in the spirit of sharing more than you'd probably ever want to know. I've never even touched myself in that way. Maybe if I had touched myself things would be different. It's like a trigger food. I never tried it so I don't know what I'm missing.
I couldn't even imagine kissing something. I'll be your friend but it would take at least five years for me to even consider having sex with you."
If you're with me, then I guess your response to Octo never having an O is just....oh.
via Daily Mail
• 
My ex MIL used to work for this Arschloch's father in the early 2000's and in October of 2002 his company had their annual Halloween party for the employee's kids. As my ex was in rehab and my ex MIL wanted to attend, I had to drive her so she could take my daughters to the lame-o party where I met the freak and she was COMPLETELY unremarkable. There was nothing memorable about her. I don't know if she'd had any of her labkinder at the time but I'll tell you what she DID NOT have: Those two fat slugs that pass for her lips today. I wish I could go back in time to administer a swift kick to her ovaries.
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"How nice, to feel nothing, and still get full credit for being alive."
- Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five
"People need sex, but I don't .. I have zero sexual interest."
Kill yourself.
Bitch has man hands.
Submitted by K2 on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 11:00am.
She made her bed- now I dont want to hear anymore whining coming from her tired mouth.
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Her mouth can't be that tired, she doesn't like sex!
That's weird, she spends all of that money on plastic surgery to look like a muppet of her former self....for who then? As if we didn't know already, this woman is a head case. She is an attention whore and yet goes around bragging she hates sex. The only man who is going to want her is maybe a eunuch, and even that's pushing it.
This disgusts me even more now ...
She would've NEVER needed IVF in the first place, if she would've just been open to having sex with her first husband !! What the fuck happened to IVF being for the purpose of infertile couples? NOT single women that want to raise an army of children on their own - with the help of the state and government !! IVF should be a last resort not your first option because you dont want to have sex. People are screwed up.
She made her bed- now I dont want to hear anymore whining coming from her tired mouth.
yes she's touched herself
she doens't have sexual drive cuz she has no hormones left
and her baby daddy is obviously a gay man
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http://tinyurl.com/69rcrqy
Well honey, that's convenient. Because no one wants to do you either.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
This asswipe is entering Pete Burns territory!
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www.charitywater.org
www.animalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
LMAO @ Jack ( only cause I don't think is true). Oh great now my husband wants to know why I am LOL.
"And in the spirit of sharing more than you'd probably ever want to know. I've never even touched myself in that way. Maybe if I had touched myself things would be different."
Ummmm... did she just tell the whole world she doesn't masturbate? Could someone please shove a huge dildo in her fat-lipped mouth to shut her up?
Are those photoshopped things supposed to be bubbles? Ovum? What a lame cover in addition to the utter piece of crap it features.
Who cares?
THIS BITCH. What a freak. Honestly, though, I don't think I'd want to fuck anyone, either, knowing that I'd it would probably result in another infant to add to that already leviathan Baby Mountain of hers.
I'm a bit fuzzy on the details of her one billion pregnancies. Does anyone know if she have any of her babies vaginally, or were they all by C-section? I'm assuming that the octomoppets must've been delivered via C-section, but what about the earlier ones? I think she had at least the first two one-at-a-time. I mean, since we're talking about the state of THIS BITCH's vag, I may as well voice my curiosity.
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Devil's advocate.
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 7:50am.
:P
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011
Doesn't look like they had any other editorial content for that issue....
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Submitted by Stock Broker on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 7:32am.
Is Steppin' Out one of those free "Penny Saver" rags you pick up at gas stations?
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 7:35am.
"it would take at least five years for me to even consider having sex with you"
If I had a nickel for every time I've heard that.
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LOL! Awwww Jack, I very much doubt that is true! You are probably living the life of a rock star. Every night, a new batch of panties dropped!
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Submitted by El Bastardo on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 11:39am.
You're only bisexual if someone rams a bottle of water up your ass and you cum. FACT.
"it would take at least five years for me to even consider having sex with you"
If I had a nickel for every time I've heard that.
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011
Is Steppin' Out one of those free "Penny Saver" rags you pick up at gas stations?
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"His faggy coffee shop poetry reading glasses will go over well in prison. I expect to see them on cumonglasses.com". ~ Dlister Provolone
What about the other 6 kids? Who is their father/fathers?
Weren't they conceived naturally?
'We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.'
I don't care what anyone says, I find her fascinating and would like to get to know her. She's unique and unique is hard to find nowadays.
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Visit my husband's webcomic DUNGEON HORDES at http://www.drunkduck.com/dungeon_hordes
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Submitted by Whamo on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 7:02am.
Who the fuck would want to kiss that face anyway? There is NO WAY I could pull that thing close to me a kiss it, NO WAY IN HELL!
It amazes me how fucking gross in every conceivable way this woman is.
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You KNOW her hygiene must be sketchy at best!
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Submitted by El Bastardo on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 11:39am.
You're only bisexual if someone rams a bottle of water up your ass and you cum. FACT.
Who the fuck would want to kiss that face anyway? There is NO WAY I could pull that thing close to me a kiss it, NO WAY IN HELL!
It amazes me how fucking gross in every conceivable way this woman is.
this is not what I meant when I said idiots need to stop fucking and breeding. Now I gotta clarify and say they should stop implanting too....
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I don't wanna be loved, just wanna quickie. No bite
marks, no scratches, and no hickey.
I don't think we should under-estimate the likelihood that what she said is about the only shocking thing any celebrity can say anymore to get attention...
Eww..she has nasty fingers. I guess that would be the least of her worries.
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Love is Found
octo puss is asexual...i get that...but i don't feel the need to know anything more about this woman...why is cps not snatched her kids away yet?
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Charisma, Uniqueness, Nerve and Talent...
Submitted by clairey claire on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 3:12am.
Ah, but she's not hurting them because she's asexual. She's hurting them because she's a selfish cunt.
And trust me, whores do hurt people. Just ask my ex.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by bookworm on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 10:11pm.
Is it possible that she is a virgin? Weren't all of her births c-sections? Would being a virgin stop an IVF doctor from implanting someone with embryo's?
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Normally being batshit crazy with 6 children already and no income would stop them.
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
Submitted by smokeybaconflavour on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 3:41am.
Sometimes I think it would be nice if I wasn't so horny all the time, but when my constant urge to fuck goes away, I get worried that I'm sick or something. It never goes away for more than a couple hours though.
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a dream come true, you are!.... back off, people!.. she's even got "bacon" in her name!... this one's lovely!!... heeheehee!
OT: oh, yeah... octo is vermin...
...that is all.
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
Sometimes I think it would be nice if I wasn't so horny all the time, but when my constant urge to fuck goes away, I get worried that I'm sick or something. It never goes away for more than a couple hours though. I guess I'm the anti-Octo.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 8:17pm.
I just made the effort to read that shit, and actually I think it's better to be asexual than a fucking whore. I don't hate her all that much anymore.
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Nothin wrong with being a whore Lucifer. Whores don't hurt anyone (so long as you wrap it). This scumbag is hurting 14 innocent people every day.
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"It's always funny until somebody gets hurt-then it's fucking hilarious": The late great Bill Hicks
Thanks for bringing Splice back to my consciousness MK. My friend told me that she met Adrian Brody at a party the other day, and she started banging on about the Pianist or whatever highbrow shit he has been in and all I could think was EEEEWWWWWW ALIEN FUCKER!
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"It's always funny until somebody gets hurt-then it's fucking hilarious": The late great Bill Hicks
Good lord, WHY does this woman still have custody of all those children? You know that any money she made from this cover and "interview" went to pay plastic surgery bills (so she can get more).
I just know she's collecting money from the State of California for those kids. Doesn't anyone monitor her various "jobs?"
Meh. Asexuals exist. They don't, generally, have 14 babies tho...
It's still the most interesting thing about her and, frankly, it's getting a little old (like her babies).
♥ Threadkilla!
RIP, Amy: Sep14,1983 to Jul23,2011
http://youtu.be/Con6WaimJ6c
When she ends up on Celebrity Rehab recounting childhood abuse, I for one won't be surprised. She needs help and she needs to go do it privately in a cave far, far away from the public and her kids.
Oh, and that Splice movie freaked me out. It sucked and was creepy all at once. :P
i kind of believe her on the not touching herself thing cause i have never really done it either. I always would hear girls talking about it (in school) but i always thought it was shameful or something (or embarrasing, i dont really know how to explain it).
As with everything, Nadya goes overboard with her statements on this topic too. I do feel, however, that some people place too much emphasis on sex. IMO a good relationship is founded on love and mutual respect. The physical part comes third (or maybe even later). In other words: he either tells me I'm right when I know I'm right, or he ain't getting any. LOL.
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"It is unwise to be too sure of one's own wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err."
Mahatma Gandhi
How can anybody go through life without ever touching themselves up?
Even if it's only out of curiosity.
So she has 6 kids and NO HUSBAND and goes to a fertility doctor? WTF?
Submitted by Infamous on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 9:57pm.
was she abused or molested as a child?
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Infamous - I never thought of this before, but I'll bet you're right. It would explain a lot.
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What's as equally as funny to me is a hillbilly Santa Claus jumping up from his motorized sleigh to whoop a trick with pepaw fists of fury! It's a win/win. MK 7/21/11
Http://www.cafepress.com/kosmiqpandora
Wow just wow.
Is it possible that she is a virgin? Weren't all of her births c-sections? Would being a virgin stop an IVF doctor from implanting someone with embryo's?
Her 'issues' run very, VERY deep. She is truly a weird, unique, crazy as batshit, fruitloop from hell. A psychiatrist would have a field day with this nutcase, not to mention make loads of money from treating her. She baffles me.
She may have teeny tiny mental health issues. *dusts off hands, hangs up smock, diagnosis complete*
Submitted by TheBrazilliant on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 9:43pm.
...See, Octomom just made me compliment Bai Ling and Tila Tequila. That's some fucking accomplishment.
BAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA!!!
"I couldn't even imagine kissing something. I'll be your friend but it would take at least five years for me to even consider having sex with you."
You cannot believe how happy everyone feels about that statement!!! Yes.... Do NOT EVER consider having sex, human - or surgical - ever, EVER AGAIN!!!!!
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I guess it's best to end a relationship the same way you start it: absolutely fucking tanked. MK 6/11
was she abused or molested as a child?
www.theinfamouslife.com
www.twitter.com/so_infamous
it's very sad when photoshop can't even make you attractive. :(
"I just made the effort to read that shit, and actually I think it's better to be asexual than a fucking whore. I don't hate her all that much anymore."
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I think if she was a whore she wouldn't be so absolutely fucked up in the head as to put 14 kids in the world for some camera time. She would be a regular whore, a Bai Ling or Tila Tequila, who at least only ruin their own lives, instead of creating new lives to ruin alongside their own.
See, Octomom just made me compliment Bai Ling and Tila Tequila. That's some fucking accomplishment.
Well. Thank God for that news flash.
We're all safe. I was afeared she might be on the prowl for "octo-sex" with anyone having a pulse.
.
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Looks like she's going for a Cher look now. A regular one-woman sideshow.
.
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it is incalculable what this woman's sick actions will cost all of us and every one of those children. i consider her right up there with a serial murderer.
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"End well: this isn't going to." - MK