Kitty Lambert and Cheryle Rudd, the first same-sex couple to marry in New York State a second after midnight today.
Rojo Caliente and Cynthia Nixon should’ve been the ones to inaugurate same-sex marriage in New York since Frédéric Bartholdi looked into the future and based the Statue of Liberty’s torch on Rojo’s flaming locks of red hot freedom, but if anybody besides them deserved to be the first it’s Kitty and Cheryle. As the lights of every Home Depot in the state flickered the lyrics to an Indigo Girls song in Morse code, Kitty and Cheryle became wife and wife in front of Niagara Falls. The gayelle memaws and mothers of five have been waiting for this day for over ten years. Kitty told The New York Times, “This is one of the most incredible moments of my personal life, but it’s also an incredible moment for New York.”
It’s also an incredible moment for those really hot wedding ensembles, which haven’t felt the touch of outside air since Kitty and Cheryle wore them to their prom over 35 years ago. Looking like Tyne Daly as a mother of the bride circa 1981 and Johnny Cash at his communion is definitely the look. Say FUCK YES to that dress and tux.
Congratulations to Kitty and Cheryle! My feelings about all of this have already been expressed by Cheryle’s fupa, which is filled with so much excitement that it’s about to pop and send that button flying across the state and into the stupid mouth hole of an anti-gay marriage protester in NYC.
Happy Gay Marriage Day, New York!