Thursday, July 21st 2011
The Photoshop Awards: Katie Holmes On Vogue España
If John Travolta's leather daddy closet and every outfit En Vogue has ever worn collided into a statue chiseled from a giant foundation stick, it might look like the cover of Vogue Espana starring Katie Holmes. A peeled rutabaga wrapped in black lace would look more like Katie Holmes than Katie Holmes does on this cover, but I actually like it. The whole thing is ridiculous since Katie is vanilla as vanilla can be (even if you covered her with creamed leather and top her with a leather cherry), but I still like it. Katie is showing Tommy that he's not the only bitch in the family who can cock a leather daddy hat to the side ("Still wouldn't" - Tommy) and this cover has also given me my new favorite safe word: "¡Guau!"
via ONTD
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yeah the last thumb is out of focus...way to earn that paycheck, photographer *rolls eyes*
and yes team low rise flared leg...who the hell looks good in mom jean rise? :-P
M.E. I hope you used the code ONBIG30 for 30% off today only!!
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
She looks more like an enchanted mystery kitten.
Seeing as how she is probably completely deprived of all sexual pleasures (other than furiously rubbing when out before the two minute alarm goes off on the bathroom door indicating her potty time should be over) I bet she would be awesome in the sack...
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Anyone can get screwed, its not rocket science.
Submitted by kate773 on Thu, 06/23/2011 - 11:06am.
Submitted by ethang on Thu, 07/21/2011 - 12:15pm.
Like Anne Hathaway, Katie just can't be sexy. Too bland. Way too vanilla.
ok I thought it was just me who thinks Anne Hathaway looks like Bert. *whew*
Not bad katie. Not bad!
that's the happiest I've seen her look in a while. good for her.
Lmao M.E.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Si Stoney! *said in mah best spanish accent with a little texas twang*
Cutest when worn with a platform heel or wedge.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
guest - TRUE!
I just went to ON to check em out and they have a "skinny flare" where the bell isn't so BIG and they rest on the hips.
I ordered a pair.
*reports self*
Team hip-hugger bell-bottoms!
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Flare low rise are really hip hugger bell bottoms. lol.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
¡Guau! ¿Donde estan mis pantalones?
Translation: Wow! Where are my pants?
Coma Caca!
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I hope she put these outfits away for Suri when she grows up to be a Nazi Stripper
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
"still wouldn't - tom" hahahaha i love you mk. can we be friends?!
Pretentious fashion twaddle.
"encaje negro labios nude" sounds hot and racist!
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
Trying too hard like Jennifer Aniston.
The stylists of this photo shoot should have gone to Ace Hardware for props, not Victoria Secret.
Black lace sucks!
Trampy tatooed slut, Kat VonD could have rocked this look.
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Affirmative Action = idiots end up in environments, they are profoundly ill-equipped to navigate.
stoney - I like bootcut, flare makes me look short (I think) plus, since I'm a clumsey ho, I trip over super flare.
seriously, she looks like a "Twilight Zone" mannequin pissed off because she can't come to life -
That hat reminds me of Bombshell McGee, not a happy thought.
I kinda like the 4th thumb, with the zorro like mask.
Maybe it's the mask.
She looks ridiculous.
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"Submitted by suckandfuck on Fri, 04/16/2010 - 5:46pm.
I would slaughter a thousand babies for an hour alone with Mike Rowe."
Snideychick sez:
The sexy is not one of her strengths. She was cute as a starlet, that's all.
Katie, just embrace the soccer mom look. It's who you really are.
The ideal jean is both low rise AND flare!
I was born in the wrong decade, clearly. LOL
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Many things can be said about this woman...crazy, bad actress, married a bigger crazy than her...but nobody can deny that she is simply gorgeous
LOL What is this?!? It's like she trying to glam up the Ava Braun story.
I HATE all the lace that is being shown for the fall. 98% of it just looks tacky and like it should be on a Poison groupie circa 1987.
FLARE JEANS???????????!?!?!?!?!?!?!
NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yet they are getting rid of their low rise.
*cries*
Or at least not selling much of a variety of low rise jeans.
*my gunt doesn't like high waisted shit*
Holmes trying to rock Charlotte Rampling's Night Porter circa 1974 is about as successful as Aretha Franklin walking the runway in Prada...it just aint happenin
she looks pretty but dead inside.
it looks like she's wearing white long johns under that lace thing
What, no cankle shots?
Crankenstein
She has zero charisma and she looks like she is getting ready to do the goosestep shuffle. I just do not find this woman compelling. At all.
So is menswear making a comeback AGAIN this fall? Seems to be a big thing every few years. Bleh, you can keep the stiff collars and ties. I did see where Old Navy is bringing back flare jeans, and I am way too excited about that lol.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
According to my friend Katie was the cute girl that you thoght was going to turn into this Hot chick but then she did not.
Guao haha that's been my word for a while
I started saying it after my bf's ex-wife messaged me "guao J is your boyfriend!?! " I started laughing. Didn't message her weird ass back. That convo would've been drama.
angel_i:
I agree, and I think she looks great, BUT we all know this trick cannot keep this look up to save her life. The fact that she is a former model and should know her way around a goddamn walk-in closet irks me even that much more. She is bearded to one of the richest men in the world and yet she cannot seem to be able to hire a stylist blessed with the gift of sight!
EPIC FAIL!
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Meh. Come on, everyone looks good in Black and White. I had some Black and White Lingerie pics done a few years back and i looked HOT (without photoshop), although i can barely produce a decent "everyday" Photo without looking like a damn chicken...
Any magazine photo can not convince me someone is beautiful. I gotta see someone in person to make that judgement.
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"I also have felt the nose heat of the man meat."
SFRB, 04/26/11
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http://www.youtube.com/user/beeper246#p/a/u/2/BrO86m4qAEs
Thumbnail #5 is the only pic that has a little spark in it. The rest are meh. She lacks appeal.
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Take a bow, freak. Jack-n-the-hat 10-5-2009
For what purpose was this created? A goddamn project for whore school? Sophie_003 10-6-2009
It's really sad that she is clearly trying to be Victoria Beckham in these photos and ol' Vicky is known only for shopping and be married to a guy who cheats on her with anything with a pulse.
Like Anne Hathaway, Katie just can't be sexy. Too bland. Way too vanilla.
I think she looks much better with her face covered by masks.
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Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
You know what? Personally, I think she hit the mark. Sure - WE can see she's full of shit...but she and Posh and Angelina and Gwynnie are all selling to that market that still exists, somehow - the perfect wife and mother market. And they have chosen husbands that can support their right to BUY. And I think these celebs sell the best cuz they're not SO gorgeous - cuz they let the paps get "candid" shots of them lookin'a little haggard...and these women really begin to relate. And then as they go about their vapid day refusing to cut their children's nails they have these celebwhores to look up to and glean knowledge from...
♥ Threadkilla!
Real Life Twitter, Celebrity Edition:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6550621/real-life-twitter-2-celebrity-...
Nice photographs.
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Too bad she has NO clue how to hide the crazy and that shit backfired like creamed corn out the ass.-ISprainedMyUvula
I don't know who the fuck that is in thumb 3 (the chair) but those sure the hell are not Kate(ie)s legs.
We all know bitch has no ankles and her calves are the same size as her thighs.
I think she looks fine but we all know her legs aren't that thin.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
Guau means Wow
Wow Katie Holsme as you never seen her "everyday I try to let Tom how much I love him"
this doesnt look like her
"I will pee myself today and when someone asks, "what is that smell?", I will happily tell them Veluptuous by KK!" Urmomma
Fucking no.
Just....no.
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""There is no chicken or egg. It's molecular." - Lady Gaga
Remember when Tom decreed she was to be called KATE? Hmmmm.
Hussy, we have your number. You can be asked to pose in Vogue Neptunia and no one will care. Your movies are also shit. Your husband is a deluded asshole. Your daughter wears high heels. You are running a close second with Goop as to who we can't stand more.
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mehhh..
she's not sexy.. at ALL