Chris Brown’s Neighbors Hate Him

July 20, 2011 / Posted by:

Chris Brown’s neighbors didn’t need to get punched in the eye and bit in the cheek to realize that he’s an asshole of the highest degree. They learned the easy way that the craft project Urkel is a douchebag royale who only cares about himself. Would you be surprised if I told you those safety pins came from the diapers of orphans? Nope.

TMZ says that Chris moved into a West Hollywood condo just a few months ago and he’s already made enemies with the building manager and his neighbors. The building manager says Chris keeps parking his cars in handicapped spaces and his neighbors are threatening to have his shit towed. Chris’ lawyer says that those parking spaces belong to him and it’s the developers fault for not telling him that those spaces are for the disabled. Chris’ lawyer is fighting with the building over the spaces. But the building manager says Chris is also guilty of parking in other handicapped spaces too.

Chris’ neighbors are also banging at the walls over his loud parties and the dog races he holds in the hallways at all hours of the night.

Chris’ neighbors might be showing hate for him, but they are still a group of law-abiding polite citizens. There are some buildings I know where the people don’t play. Air would’ve been let out of tires. A mound of dog caca wrapped in a banana peel would’ve somehow made its way into his car’s exhaust pipe. When I lived in CA, I dated some dude who lived in a building like that and I’d purposely park in the wrong space just so that when I did the walk of shame to my car at the end of the night, I’d find a special present in the form of “DUMB DICK” written on my door in cinnamon toothpaste.

That being said, Chris should defend these claims by showing them this picture of his foolish ass looking like the Good Humor man with a magnet dildo shoved all the way up into his gut. It will help him prove that he suffers from a chronic disability called assholism.

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