Blind Items: I Guess, You Guess
Bree Olson, one of Charlie Sheen’s ex-Goddesses, co-hosted HOT1079‘s morning radio show in her hometown of Fort Wayne. After giving details about her relationship with Charlie Sheen, she mentioned that she has also been involved with a multiple Oscar winner who has starred in recent blockbusters. (Blind Gossip)
The only multiple Oscar winning actors who are still alive are: Robert DeNiro, Jack Nicholson, Tom Hanks, Sean Penn, Denzel Washington, Gene Hackman, Dustin Hoffman, Michael Caine, Daniel Day-Lewis and Kevin Spacey.Yeah, I don't know why I kept typing after "Sean Penn" when I could've used those keystrokes on writing my fanfic retelling of When Harry Met Sally starring Prince Hot Ginge and me. I still need a title. When Harry Met My Fanny? When Harry Met Sally which is the nickname for my b-hole? Anyway, Sean Penn, Sean Penn. Totally that German Shepard-faced man whore Sean Penn.
Which Latino comic’s kinky “sexcapades” were caught on video and are now making the rounds in Hollywood AND on the Internet? It seems a disgruntled ex downloaded the dirty clips that show the funnyman in some very compromising positions! (National Enquirer via Blind Gossip)
You know you've hit rock bottom when you've spent the last 20 minutes trolling the Internet for any signs of George Lopez's nalgas bobbing up and down (like the back of two old bull dogs panting) in a sex tape. That's what a slow cry for help looks like.
WHICH TV personality is having HUGE issues with her designer wedding dress because she can barely squeeze into it? The des-perate-to-be-thin bride-to-be has now resorted to crash-dieting for her big day. (National Enquirer via CDAN)
Kim Kardashian would just remove a bone or an obese internal organ she doesn't need (like a heart, etc), so I'm going to guess that Sherri Shepherd is the bride whose something blue will be a bruise from her a Spanx cocoon.
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I know that Bree Olson has some regrets.
(973) Jersey Strong
Submitted by notreallyworking on Wed, 07/20/2011 - 7:39am.
yes, doing phat gaggers with Bree Olsen would simply be horrible... yet, I would tap dat azz no problemo! Being a dog has its advantages, I suppose...
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I cosign all of this!
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Anyone can get screwed, its not rocket science.
Submitted by kate773 on Thu, 06/23/2011 - 11:06am.
yes, doing phat gaggers with Bree Olsen would simply be horrible... yet, I would tap dat azz no problemo! Being a dog has its advantages, I suppose...
"Boy, the next words that come out of your mouth better be some brilliant fuckin' Mark Twain shit. 'Cause it's definitely getting chiseled on your tombstone."
The two goddess must have been paid off and had an iron clad contract, because to the best of my knowledge and research skills, I haven't heard one of them cash out on their experience living at La Casa Charlie. I'd love to know what went on behind those closed doors.
Submitted by smokeybaconflavour on Tue, 07/19/2011 - 11:24pm.
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If #2 IS John Leguizamo, I don't want to see this...I NEED to see this!
#3: KK or Jessica Simpson, she WAS a TV personality right?
"When Harry met my fanny" made me LOL...since over here, a fanny is a vagina :)
Hekki: "cooze" is such a perfect word for that whore.
elanenergy: there will always be one guy who is willing to stick his dick in that. Think of all the nasty, disease-ridden skanks trolling around out there. A wet hole is a wet hole.
urmomma: "fart box banging" is perhaps one of the best phrases EVER.
I hope #2 is John Leguizamo, but it probably is George Lopez, or even worse Carlos Mencia : (
Ha! All you b's are hilarious today. Who needs an education if you have a bottle of peroxide and a flexible asshole? Oh, the places you'll go. I wonder how many drugs she has to do each day to forget she's a person and not just a sperm receptacle. If this is Sean, I will be disappointed. He's skanky, but sharing assholes with Charlie Sheen seems too low even for him.
Bree is 1 letter away from stinky cheese.
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Tue, 07/19/2011 - 7:00pm.
lol @ urmomma.
The concentration camp Grandma bit made me lol. Can you imagine, you suffer through something like that and then your offspring decides to do THIS with their lucky shot at life???
And I dont care what anyone says, if you have ass-sex all day every day for a living, you will get anal leakage eventually.....
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Fuckin' a. *fart box banging (*copyright Raul)and Olestra will give you anal leakage everytime....I just wanted to enjoy chips and dip without the calories! Damn it, is nothing sacred anymore?
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Too bad she has NO clue how to hide the crazy and that shit backfired like creamed corn out the ass.-ISprainedMyUvula
Anyone else notice the excessive (and unnecessary) amount of DASHes in the description for #3? Yep, definitely Kim KarDASHian.
lol @ urmomma.
The concentration camp Grandma bit made me lol. Can you imagine, you suffer through something like that and then your offspring decides to do THIS with their lucky shot at life???
And I dont care what anyone says, if you have ass-sex all day every day for a living, you will get anal leakage eventually.....
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"I also have felt the nose heat of the man meat."
SFRB, 04/26/11
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http://www.youtube.com/user/beeper246#p/a/u/2/BrO86m4qAEs
#1 Who would be stupid enough to stick their dick in that festering swamp of STDs?
*awaiting results of IQ tests before I hazard a guess*
#2 Gotta be Lopez. But I do agree with Mike regarding the slim possibility of keeping anything secret on the interwebz. So where are the pics?
#3 Kardasian is sufficiently driven (and vain) to starve her big fat arse for her wedding. Sherri (flat earther) Shepherd is a dimwitted slob whose resolve would snap at the smell of a Snickers bar. Jessica Simpson is probably having pork based snacks sewn into her gown just in case she gets snacky on the way down the aisle.
I just Googled Bree Olson. She's had a lot of dicks in her butt.
http://smellmybutt.tumblr.com/
Classy...can you imagine this on your resume?:
Experience: I am one of Chuck Sheen's ex-Goddesses. I have experience with fucked up former movies/cracked out sitcom actors shitting their pants after a night of too much crack and flacid peen sex....will launder bed sheets for money. But I am not limited to "fucking" crack heads for money and notoriety. I also have expereince as a *corn detassler and *bus boy at my local eatery. I worked as a *paid fuck doll, became a PentHouse Pet (akak: too ugly for Playboy), was on the cover of Hustler (aka: shit didn't pan out at Penthouse and turned to sucking assholes for a living) and once had *aspirations of becoming a doctor. But I gave that all up once I knew that whores made more money. I am a people person, damn it. People like me. And I am worth it. Oh. and my *greatest hero: my grandma. She survived a concentration camp just to see me become a slut.
*note: that shit is actually on wiki.
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Too bad she has NO clue how to hide the crazy and that shit backfired like creamed corn out the ass.-ISprainedMyUvula
Doncha just love this trick Bree Olson's attempt to stretch her "career" as a "Goddess" to f'ing walking corpse Charlie Sheen's harem? By talking about an even BIGGER STAR FUCKER SHE HAS BEEN IN THE PAST. My question to you dlisted educated horz: is there really a market for her? Would some dude (or dudette) really wanna hit that....knowing where it's been and all?
My vision of world peace: a chicken in every pot, and pot for all us chickens...and weasels.
Submitted by Cat Scratch on Tue, 07/19/2011 - 6:33pm.
God, Bree Olson is disgusting.
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Yes, she is. I went to her Twitter page after she got, er, famous? And it was beyond vile. Not in a good way, either. Like, she tweets about how she wants the mailman to brutally rape her so she can show her dad her torn up twat. It's some real I-was-molested-and-have-hated-myself-ever-since shit.
God, Bree Olson is disgusting.
On Howard Stern she said she walked into an airport with jizz on her face because she thought it was sexy. She also talked about how she fucked a janitor at a nightclub where she had been fucking guys all night anyways.
She's so painfully average-looking and just marginal as a human being all around- she's probably lying. Let's get real? Who's gonna fuck her raggy ass more than once?
I know what should happen. Kim KardRASHian should get mounted by a bulldog with Sean Peen watching.
Jack Nicholson is my guess for the skank who bones the entire universe, Bree Olson, and all the others I forgot cause they are redundant and boring...something about a mexican dog and something else about a fat ass bride...sorry but I refuse to give Whoretrashian another minute of my precious time.
LOL, Joe Shmoe! Hee. AlMIGHTY PENIS indeed. Can make even men pregnant.
Submitted by Andrei on Tue, 07/19/2011 - 3:54pm.
Mmm.. I'd do Bree with my almighty, imaginary penis.
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hahaha..If it's imaginary, you might as well make it almighty. Always think big, I say. ;)
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I've read stories about Denzel being a whore, but none of them sound like the best private jet type.
O I thought this might be a new series called What They THINK They Look Like and this one's Britney.
♥ Threadkilla!
Real Life Twitter, Celebrity Edition:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6550621/real-life-twitter-2-celebrity-...
Sean Penn is not in recent blockbusters, so that's out.
Mel Gibson has not won multiply, so that lets him out as well.
If only Nic Cage had multiple Oscars, it fits him to a T (National Treasure, et al.)
So, I'm gonna hafta say, GENE HACKMAN, YOU DAWH YOU!
~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~
#1. Could be Tom Hanks with his Toy Story movies.
I think Victoria should be with a pro-bodybuilder or wrestler, guys like that Maurice are more for the Liz Hurleys of this world.
"Maybe I missed something but Sean Penn and Blockbuster movies??"
Well, you do have a point. Sean is definitely not one of those actors who are not known for blockbuster movies. Sean and Mel came up in my head since they are good friends with Charlie Sheen. Hollyweird is a big mess of a town, so it could be ANYONE.
EDIT. Feel like an ass.
"Didn't he and Ashley Judd fuck back in the day?"
Wow, that's new to me. He's always had a thing for BW, but of course it's possible.
Submitted by mike on Tue, 07/19/2011 - 4:58pm.
#2 Sorry, does Hollywood have its own private internet, because if something were making the rounds "on the Internet" we'd have heard of it
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gotta agree, with mike on this one... but i'll still throw in a guess for Carlos Mencia.
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
I couldn't give a rats ass about these lame and vapid blind guesses; but this chick's hair just screams out Farrah from 1976. Funny, what goes around, comes back again.
#2 Sorry, does Hollywood have its own private internet, because if something were making the rounds "on the Internet" we'd have heard of it
These seem too easy and eww to #2 no one needs to see that.
I think the Latino comedian is the guy who got eliminated first in DWTS!
He's sexy as hell tho! I would watch his sextape haha!
Hekki -- only on dlisted would one come across the word "cooze" -- haven't heard that one for ages. And that's exactly what that disesased woman in the tub is!
#3 makes plenty of sense and of course it's KK. Lots of brides order a size smaller with the intention of losing some weight, and alterations save the day when they don't. KK, however, has made a public spectacle of how she's going to drop the lbs for her wedding so of course she ordered her dress too small and of course she's going to make sure she fits in it, rather than having them make it fit her.
Maybe I missed something but Sean Penn and Blockbuster movies??
Nail me to my car... then I'll tell you who you are...Joe The Lion
Plus...Katface Lardassian is getting married in a few weeks. So a crash diet would be right up her arsehole...which I'm sure is nicknamed "Moneymaker". heheheh
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"If when you die you get a choice between pie heaven and regular heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick but if not mmmboy!"
Also? That "tub" that cooze is in looks like someone sprinkled Ajax on it and didn't scrub or rinse it.
That girl looks diseased. I bet she has scabs on her nasty cooch.
Nova, I agree that it's not Sherri. She's not desperate to be thin. I think she is realistic about her size and likes it (more power to her).
Kim K or Chestica...
your b-hole is named sally? or did i read that wrong?..lol if your b-hole is named sally
i have a weird name for my area..so can't judge
Oh...just read this interview where Sherri said...“It’s amazing how much a reception is! When anybody comes I told them, ‘You better eat all the hors d’oeuvres drink up all the liquor and eat all the food because we’re paying for all that stuff. I’m not playing around! Don’t be freakin’ ‘I want to be skinny!’ Eat the steak, eat the roll, everything! I’m not holding in my stomach for the reception! I plan on partying.”
Yeah...she plans on eating up everything...so #3 can't be her.
so it MUST be Lardassian. :)
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"If when you die you get a choice between pie heaven and regular heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick but if not mmmboy!"
Submitted by Hekki on Tue, 07/19/2011 - 3:11pm.
I will bet a million dollars that Kim K has *at least* two wedding dresses.
at least four.
1) ceremony dress
2) reception dress #1 - when you arrive to the venue
3) reception dress #2 - when everyone gets tanked, so you she can party more comfortably
4) "going away" dress - when they leave the reception
#1 -- Agreed it is probably Sean Pean.
#2 -- I think it is probably Carlos Mencia -- besides being an unfunny hack, I've heard he's a total perv.
#3 -- *yawn* Sheri Shepard is as good a guess as any.
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Youth ages, immaturity is outgrown, ignorance can be educated, and drunkenness sobered, but stupid lasts forever.
— Aristophanes
honestly, i stopped reading after sean penn.
but on the other hand, i seemed to have chosen the wrong profession, nowadays all the glory goes to hookers.
Why the hell are any if these stories blind items?
I don't fucking care who you sleep with Bree!
I don't fucking care what "funny man" is having sexy times.
I really don't fucking care what lady is worried about getting into a white wedding dress for one fucking day.
Ha!!
Sherri Shepard's getting married? that's nice.
I'm reminded of the time my BIL got married and the bride's ass was size X at the wedding, size X squared the next day. it was AMAZING. O_o
#1 would have to be some kind of junkie/alkie on a bender to fuck around with that diseased whore. I'm thinking Mel Gibson. No one else fits the bill. Most likely, she's just an opportunistic lie-tellin' skank bag.
#3 makes no sense and sounds completely made up. I had an inexpensive wedding dress from Alfred Angelo and they fit that fucker to my body up to 3 days before my wedding. You're telling me some bitch plunks down $25k for a dress and that doesn't include regular fittings and alterations? Even for fat fucks like Sherri Sheppard and Lardashian, they can take that shit out.
Mmm.. I'd do Bree with my almighty, imaginary penis.