If you’re birthing out a baby this week and plan to name it either Corky Sherwood or Waldo Faldo, then you better copyright it now, because obviously the theme of the week is naming your kid after 90s sitcom characters. Posh & Becks already showed their love for George Costanza by naming their first daughter Harper Seven, and now Kate Hudson and Matt Bellamy have shown us which Friends character is their favorite. No, not Smelly Cat. I wish. Matt Tweeted this immortal words that will haunt his son until the kid learns how to fill out a name-changing form on his own.
So happy! Just had a baby boy, Bingham “Bing” Hawn Bellamy. Born 7Ib 12Oz, on 9th July.
BINGHAM BING HAWN BELLAMY?! Your child’s name should not sound like a tongue twisting exercise a theater geek does before taking the stage in their high school production of Pride & Prejudice. If you typed the name “Bingham Hawn Bellamy” into BING it will automatically direct you to the website thefuckiswrongwithyourstupidass.com. Ask Jeeves Hawn Bellamy would’ve been better since bitches only use BING to find free porn and cat pictures. Bing Bellamy was probably John Waters’ first choice of a name for Corny Collins in Haispray.
But let me look at the bright side of things, if an O pushed the I out of the way and took its place, his name would be BONG BELLAMY. Doesn’t that have a beautiful ring to it? Or maybe I inhaled my last toke too fast and I really am just hearing bells ring.