George Costanza's Baby Name Stolen Yet Again!
Posh gave birth to half of her weight this morning and now David Beckham has told us on his Facebook page the name that will be glued onto a panda fur Christmas stocking in canary diamonds next to the stockings of Cruz, Romeo and Juliet. Without further adieu:
I am so proud and excited to announce the birth of our daughter Harper Seven Beckham. She weighed a healthy 7lbs 10oz and arrived at 7.55 this morning, here in LA. Victoria is doing really well and her brothers are delighted to have a baby sister xx
HARPER SEVEN?! If seven crime-fighting mockingbird superheroes formed a group, they would call that shit Harper Seven. If Harper's Bazaar created a Cylon based on Caprica Six for some reason, they'd name that ho Harper Seven. If Valerie Harper created her own cocktail using Sandy Duncan's tears and 7up, she'd call that shit Harper 7.
Apparently, they gave Harper the middle name of Seven, because 7 was the number on Becks' old Manchester United jersey. And because Seven was born in the seventh month, during the 7th hour, weighed 7 pounds and was born to a skeleton wrapped in alien skin who inhales 7 calories a week and sacrificed 7 virgins to the devil in exchange for a permanent opposite smile on her face. But we all know the real reason why Posh & Becks named her Harper SEVEN! Because they want to make George Costanza weep!
Or maybe they're just trying to outdo Six LeMeure from Blossom. Didn't work.
via UsWeekly
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Well, Becks can only make boys, so I expect this is the ivf child of Tommygirl and Bee Wintour. Anna had to cede the field, obviously.
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GERONIMO!
Neither parents are mental giants, but "Harper" really disapponts.
If Posh spent 5 mins in any West LA playground she'd see this name is the next 'Olivia'/'Sophia'/'Isabelle'.
Except "Harper" is always the homelier girl.
How much you want to bet Harper Seven becomes a fat bull dyke?
In a few years there is going to pre-schools where half the class is named harper.
Meh. I think Harper's pretentious, but I'm also a little bit of a pill that way.
Sarah Smile
Submitted by Winnyfranfran on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 12:24pm.
What the hell is the deal with that scarf? For fuck's sake!
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He's European!
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twerk those stumps!
Submitted by KidL on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 10:26am.
@KidL, I don't want them to change the law for everyone- JUST FOR THE BECKHAMS!!!
They annoy me to no end. And while I'm NOT a fan of soccer, the only reason he is here is because of the money. Beckham tried to get out of the contract with the LA Galaxy after he realized that Americans are NOT into that soccer shit and don't give a fuck about him one way or the other. He went back to Real Madrid and realized, this is REAL football, not that shit they are making me play in the colonies for a mere $250 million. They wouldn't let him out of the contract, but I think he gets to play in Europe during the off season here in the States.
Also, Posh tried to come over her and be fabulous and we told her skinny nasty wanker ass to bugger off!!! So neither one of them impressed anyone, so they wanted out.
I would be glad to give them the First Class tickets- right next to Octomom! *LOL*
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All together now: FUCK MY LIFE. - The One-and-Only Michael K- 6/17/11
LOL on the comment about Soda. That episode was on last week.
What the hell is the deal with that scarf? For fuck's sake!
it's "without further ado"...not "adieu"...just saying...
Submitted by Waist High on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:25am.
"If Valerie Harper created her own cocktail using Sandy Duncan's tears and 7up..." --- L.O.L. --- your best work ever Dlisted!
I agree it was good, but if you were really on, MK, you would have said "tears from Sandy Duncan's one good eye". Kidding, MK, I loves you.
Harper is a surprisingly normal name. And those of you who said it's getting popular are right. Even my teenage heartthrob Eddie Vedder has a girl named Harper.
you totally went BSG with that sh*t. love you!
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be careful what you wish for...
More Harper tiriva: Paul Simon has a son named Harper (adult); I believe he was named after PS's first wife's last name.
"If Valerie Harper created her own cocktail using Sandy Duncan's tears and 7up..." --- L.O.L. --- your best work ever Dlisted!
Submitted by DeeDee on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 7:15am.
Kelly Kapowski named her daughter Harper last year
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Lisa Marie Presley named one of her twin daughters that even before Kelly Kapowski.
After Harper's first day at school, she is picked up by her daddy. One of her classmates hears Becks speak and says, "Harpah, who dis woman?"
Submitted by elmo533 on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 5:35am.
OT: I like the name, although Erykah Badu and Andre 3000 beat them to the name Seven over ten years ago. Although their BS reason for the name is that "seven cannot be divided".
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BS is right. I am no math whiz but the number seven can certainly be divided.
I am thinking bofe Andre and Erykah failed maff class. And "Erykah" failed spellin' too.
Major let down. I was hoping for some princessy frou-frou name. NPH and Kelly Kapowski already have Harpers, couldn't they have found something else? And Seven is just stupid. Reminds me of Married With Children.
Submitted by stefystef on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 9:20am.
Yup. That is the law. It certainly is very controversial right now and some people want to change that esp. as some illegal immigrants have so-called 'anchor babies' so they can stay in the US. (Note: I don't mean this to be racist or anti-immigrant. My dad is originally from Hong Kong, and I am as far from a WASP, Daughter of the Revolution member that you can get. My maternal grandfather was an Austrian Jew, so the most any of us go back is like 2 generations.)
With that said, it wouldn't make sense for Pig-nosed Posh to have her kiddo in the UK as she is currently living in the US. I cannot stand her, but cannot hate on her for this one.
As someone with a British husband and family over there, I wish she and her ass clown hubby would relocate to another planet. Maybe one with lots of bimbos as David is a notorious philanderer. They really make me ill.
Sorry no congrats from me to anyone with Franken Kids, especially these DESIGNER Franken Kids!!!
Because anyone believing that she conceived that 'GIRL' naturally by sheer chance, obviously lives in la la land.
NPH' Franken Twins who have two different bio fathers and came out of a rented womb also make me ill.
Harper Seven is a pretty ugly name, but I guess that was to be expected.
BTW pronounced in the Beckhams chaf accent it really does sound like Halfpastseven...lol
I like the name.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Harlow! Thank you louise_brooks - I think actually I knew that too. Her brother's called Sparrow, though, right? So he beats Harper's sibs too. I don't think Cruz is named after TommyGirl though, as David was playing for Real Madrid and they were living in Spain then ... The British papers made a lot of the fact that it's apparently more commonly a Spanish girl's name, but hey, it's probably still preferable to going through life as Romeo.
I'll also second that there were some sex-selection shenanigans going on with this baby, especially now that they live in CA; I'm pretty sure sex-selection isn't allowed in the UK, although I could be wrong. In fact until that "snap" was posted the other day I had a conspiracy theory going that she wasn't actually pregnant herself and was using a surrogate in order to avoid having to eat real food.
I'm spending too much time thinking about this.
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"I've got one word to say to you, Kim ..."
Submitted by chinlee3 on Sun, 07/10/2011 -
Then there is the hippie Trout family from Occidental who named their young-uns River, Rainbow and Brown.
yup Rainbow. I was typing faster than I think again.
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What, no White and Speckled to complete the family?!
Submitted by KidL on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 8:59am.
Submitted by stefystef on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 8:41am.
Yup. Anyone born in the US automatically has US citizenship.
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Seriously? Hell. We've REALLY gotta change that law. I know why it was passed back when the country was empty and almost everyone was an immigrant (except Native Americans and enslaved Africans), but now, this must end.
She should have went home to England, had her baby and then STAY IN ENGLAND!
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All together now: FUCK MY LIFE. - The One-and-Only Michael K- 6/17/11
Submitted by stefystef on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 8:41am.
Yup. Anyone born in the US automatically has US citizenship.
UGH! I feel for this poor kid. You know she's probably going to have an eating disorder by the time she is 12. Also, heaven forbid when the day comes and she is tired of being Mummy's dress-up doll.
Truly loathe these famewhores and how they pimp out their kids.
Submitted by RustyHooligan on Sun, 07/10/2011 - 10:27pm.
Hope them kids are good at football, fashion, or acting.
The fashion and acting ones don't have to have talent, they'll score on parents/connections alone. See: Gwyneth.
As for the name, I bet they thought "Harper for OUR daughta?! Too pedestrian! Let's jazz it up with (drum roll) SEVUNN!".
With a British accent it sounds like you say: Halfpastseven...
Submitted by annobanano on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 7:06am.
My mind is totally cluttered with utterly useless trivia.
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Mine too. It's too bad they don't have a show like Jeopardy, but for useless pop culture.
Sounds like a Ben Harper jazz combo
They wanted a girl so badly that they probably used some kind of medical procedure to determine the sex of the child.
Then they name it Harper? Talk about an neutral name. It can be a boy OR a girl. You'd figure she'd give her something pretty and frilling and English like Emma or Ella or Portia or something classy.
Tacky bitch. Why didn't they leave with Kate and Willliam? She's too good to have her baby in England??? UGH.
And does this make her child an American citizen?
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All together now: FUCK MY LIFE. - The One-and-Only Michael K- 6/17/11
Bahhaha sacrificed 7 virgins
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"Independent films are those black and white hippy movies. They're always about gay cowboys eating pudding." - Eric Cartman
❥
if my name was juliet & my brother was romeo I'd be skeeved out a bit that my parents thought this was a good idea.
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"I'm gonna end up back in the gutter, sucking meth for cock." - drunk Naomi in Still Waiting...
"Wrist full of colorful rubberbands!" - album reviewer extraordinaire Khia
quite fittingly...
http://j.mp/f89sny
I was really surprised she didn't schedule her C'section on 7/7 because 7 was his soccer number. I never assumed it would be her name.
Every Harper I know is a family name. I'd assume
I was really surprised she didn't schedule her C'section on 7/7 because 7 was his soccer number. I never assumed it would be her name.
Every Harper I know is a family name. I'd assume in her case it's not because she's not sentimental like that.
Harper is cute, Seven is just idiotic...but it beats the hell out of their boys' names.
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""There is no chicken or egg. It's molecular." - Lady Gaga
Seven is how many calories Posh consumes a day.
But really, that is a fucking stupid name, poor kid. Harper is meh, but Seven? That is as bad as naming your kid after an inanimate object. Like David Table or Kathy Shoe.
It would be really fucking great if Harper grows up to be a really chubby girl just to piss Posh off. Posh would spontaneously combust if her one and only daughter was a chubby girl.
I just can't with that scarf.
We all knew they were going to name the kid something stupid. At least Seven isn't the first name.
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Mr. Kinney is so vain:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=895h7Fr0m-o
It's aiight. Could be worse.
Harper strikes me as a very Southern name. I can just hear Blanche Deveraux saying it: "Haaaaah-puh".
I met kids at the playground named Harper and Baylor and their mom seemed puzzled when I asked if they were from the South.
Well, Mazel Tov to them anyway.
Harper I like, Seven is dumb and together it sounds like a vacuum cleaner.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
@tomahawk
I was reading up more too. Yes, EVERYONE concerned was lying at some time or another even the guy who found the body. Very confusing for the jury, especially because they've been secluded and can't compare info online or anything. I think if the prosecution hadn't tacked on the death penalty the jury probably would have voted guilty.
Very interesting.
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"Never ascribe to malice that which can adequately be explained by incompetence."
- Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)
Kelly Kapowski named her daughter Harper last year. She should sue Posh's unoriginal bony ass.
Submitted by louise_brooks on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 6:45am.
Submitted by Pai-Jzu on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 6:42am.
Didn't Nicole Richie also call her daughter Harper? In amongst the twelve other names I think she gave her.
Harlow. I'm going to go kick my own ass for knowing these things off the top of my head.
My mind is totally cluttered with utterly useless trivia.
Could live without Seven, but actually like the name Harper, althought now I've got Harpie stuck in my head.
What, Eight was taken?
and I'm sure Harper Seven's voice is probably deeper and more manly sounding than her father's...
"When I'm good I'm very good but when I'm bad I'm better." ~Mae West