The Time Tina Turner Shot Randy Jackson
If you're name is Randy Jackson and you're not a judge on American Idol, you have to let the ESCANDALO flow off your tongue in order to summon the spotlight and Randy Jackson of the Jackson family did just that on Twitter yesterday. During a Twitter Q&A (I can't) with his fans (I can't: the sequel), Randy told a hilarious story about the time Tina Turner shot at him after he caught her and his girlfriend off guard. Well, if you want to get shot at by Tina Turner, simply tap on her shoulder while her tongue is visiting your girlfriend's Nut Bush City Limits. Randy wrote this mess yesterday:
Yes, Tina Turner shot me. I have the scar to prove it.Having said that, there was no violence on my part, nor have I ever owned or carried a weapon.
I went to Tina's house to see my girlfriend. I guess I caught them off guard. Hmmm.... Next question.
It was in the Eighties. And I don't hold a grudge against Tina, she's a great artist an asset to our industry.
No, it's not right to ever put a bullet in a bitch even if they spook you while you're doing whatever it is you were doing with his girlfriend, but this is Tina Turner we're talking about. Tina lived for years wishing that she had eyeballs glued onto the back of her wig so she'd know when Ike Turner was about to make her eat some cake or some shit! So you have expect that if you sneak up on Tina, her pistol is going to spit a bullet at your ass! If you're ever going to throw Tina a surprise party, make all the guests wear helmets and a bulletproof vest.
And this story is the second best thing to ever come out of Randy Jackson. The first being Perpetrators, of course!
How do white girls talk? Like camel toes?
input this URL:
( http://www.chic-goods.com/ )
you can find many cheap and high stuff
(jor dan shoes)
(NBA NFL NHL MLB jersey)
( lv handbag)
(cha nel wallet)
(D&G sunglasses)
(ed har dy jacket)
===== http://www.chic-goods.com/ =====
WE ACCEPT PAY PAL PAYMENT
YOU MUST NOT MISS IT!!!
===== http://www.chic-goods.com/ =====
===== http://www.chic-goods.com/ =====
Submitted by urmomma on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 5:00pm.
Submitted by boredasfuckyo on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 12:25pm.
truly didn't mean to be offensive. More like sarcastic. So if I offended you, I really am sorry. ;]
*******************
Oh, hon, you worry too much. I was not offended, just confused. But that is pretty normal for me. I am not out to shank anyone and you sound beautiful to me. And as far as "picking one or the other", I like to pick both boxes. I did have one lady tell me to "choose one or the other" and long story it short it turned into "Oh, ya? Make me." and I won. yay me! heehee. No apology needed, but I appreciate you saying so.
*hugs it out with boredasfuckyo*
________________________________________
*Hugs it out with urmomma*
I remember once when we were doing testing in class when I was a kid,to see how much you retained during the year, and they ask for everything under the sun before you can even take it. And they were like, doing the race thing, which looking back seemed so fucking racist. Even more racist than the check which race you are surveys. The teacher would call out a race and we had to stand up, if we were that race. So he said, caucasian. I stood up. Then he said Native American, and I stood up again...And he was like uhhh.... I was like.. I'm both -_- I've seen some have the "other:" option.... or multi-racial, but I've only seen a few of those.
__________________________________
Please get the fuck out ---->
ooopsies. DP.
(that's double post, not donkey punch :)
Submitted by boredasfuckyo on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 12:25pm.
truly didn't mean to be offensive. More like sarcastic. So if I offended you, I really am sorry. ;]
*******************
Oh, hon, you worry too much. I was not offended, just confused. But that is pretty normal for me. I am not out to shank anyone and you sound beautiful to me. And as far as "picking one or the other", I like to pick both boxes. I did have one lady tell me to "choose one or the other" and long story it short it turned into "Oh, ya? Make me." and I won. yay me! heehee. No apology needed, but I appreciate you saying so.
*hugs it out with boredasfuckyo*
____________________
Hell, everything would be better with stick ponies-MK
And urmomma,
the reason why I called you a half-breed, was because it reminded me of this one black girl I went to school with who was mimicking how she preceived white girls to talk. Which ended up being a valley accent. And I'm sorry, but no one in Southeastern Louisiana, has a fucking valley girl accent, black,white or other wise. So I don't know who the fuck this bitch was hanging with or if she just had beyond fucked up hearing. So anyway, I turned to her and went, uhhhhh, I don't sound like that. To which she replied, "but you're not white, you're an indian." I said uh, I'm part white as well, to which she said, "Oh you're a half-breed then." Uh, I'm not a half breed I have other....fuck it... *Shakes head*
I truly didn't mean to be offensive. More like sarcastic. So if I offended you, I really am sorry. ;]
__________________________________
Please get the fuck out ---->
Submitted by spankypants on Sun, 07/03/2011 -
Good gravy! My grandmother was mixed on both sides, some Native American, some Black, some White. On the census they were classified as mulattos. They owned their farm outright, hired some neighbors to work and were about as successful as you could be during the depression. The rest of the community was White. When it was time for my mother to start school, she had to go to the Colored school, except there was no Colored school in the area. Her parents had to send her away, pay room and board, where she lived with strangers until the end of the term. She was heartbroken that she couldn't go to school with her best friend on the neighboring farm.....
________________________________
I can completely imagine. To this my grandfather's cousin, still has issues with it I think. It just made you feel less human. And no reason, like you weren't good enough because the color of your skin.
Alot of people don't understand that, mainly because they all went to school post-segrogation. And back then, they didn't seperate just the blacks from the whites, they seperated everyone. It was really fucked up. The stories, I was told, it sounded really depressing.
__________________________________
Please get the fuck out ---->
Submitted by urmomma on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 8:27pm.
Submitted by boredasfuckyo on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:59pm.
Submitted by urmomma on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:31pm.
________________________________
Technically you're a half-breed, then.
*****************
lmao. yes, I am a white indian, but I have the cheek bones and good hair. tyvfm.
I must admit I am a bit confused as to where all the anti-native American shit is coming from, but maybe I am not reading the posts with the right head tilt. I am proud of my heritage, but won't be asking anyone to write a term paper on the plight of the American Indians any time soon. :)
_______________________________________________
It's not that I'm Anti-Native American. My grandfather looks like an indian chief, like straight up. And my uncle is in the sergent in arms, of the native american local chapter tribal, thing here. I love my grandfather to death. As a matter of fact, he's the only blood relative, I was ever close too really.And,like you, I too have the pale skin, well, pale, but if I go in the sunlight, I can get a pretty bitchin olive tan. I also have the cheek bones, hairline, nose, etc. And I get asked all the time, "what are you?" And Idk, if you've ever been asked that, but sometimes it's really awkward and hurtful. Like what am I? I'm a fucking human being? What are you? I also have slightly slanted(my grandmother's side has some korean) eyes, so you can imagine some of the questions. I've gotten you look "exotic" or are you mexican? It's to the point where people don't even assume and just don't ask and go on with it, but clearly I am such an enigma, racially, people ask me what I am. And don't get me wrong, I am proud of my look. I am not ashamed of how I look. I love my genetic makeup, and wouldn't change it for anything, but people are just fucking assholes. And in my family, there is this strong sense of Native Pride, with alot of them having(normally the younger members) native american, or Indian, tatted on them somewhere. Completely rejecting the fact that, yes, you are not fully native american. The newer generation that is. The Aunts, Uncles and Cousins. I just don't know, why people chose to pick one race over the other I guess. What makes being part native soooo special that you deny the fact that you are infact part another race? It's not that I'm anti-native, I just don't see it as being better than any race, thats all. Even though I am infact of Native American ancestry(I can qualify for aid, and funds), and if I'm not getting it pointed out to me By strangers, I'm getting asked what I am by strangers, and it's like...shit man.
__________________________________
Please get the fuck out ---->
Submitted by putas on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 9:36pm.
*************
putas anyone who likes Constatine gets a gold star in my book. Thanks, dear.
______________
Hell, everything would be better with stick ponies-MK
Damn! Tina is a feisty one, isn't she? In her defense, i'd be a bit ummmmmm...untrusting towards men after what she had been through with her husband for years. But who would think she would actually carry a gun around with her?haha Get 'em Tina!
"I make myself sick, Get on my own nerves. Immature, insecure,Grown up nerd."
-Fat lip (The Pharcyde)
Submitted by Sweetas on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 7:08pm.
***********************************************
you did a great job. I wouldn't be a prospect for this type of thing. I was trying to give a positive criticism earlier due to the granny post. :)
My Granny ruled! She was all love and cuddles.
Love her and miss her, RIP.
**************************************************
www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
Oh please Randy. We all know Tina was defending a friend. Hell I would of done the exact same thing if you came pounding on my door looking for trouble. Dumb ass.
Submitted by putas on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 9:36pm.
LMAO @ Kimora hotdogneck.
I always call "turtleneck neck".
Urmomma anyone who posts eddie izzard links is ok in my book. Adore that sessy beast
And when I read boredasfuck's "half breed" comment I laughed thinking of the movie "constantine" and
Keanu reeves hissing "halfbreed" to gavin rossdale's (awful,over acted) character. Haha. It has djimon hounsou in the cool cat baddassery role of course..before he went to the dark side in real life and married kimora hotdogneck.
@Bored
My grandfather had to go to an all Native American school, because he wasn't allowed to go to school with white students, and where we live(mostly surrounded by bayous at the time) he had toget there by boat. I remember his cousin, telling me growing up it gave her a complex, making her feel like she wasn't good enough, to go to school with everyone else, and made her wonder why. They actually lived it. I think people who live it, are LESS whiney than the people who didn't, but only do it to get sympathy and guilt for something they didn't have to go through because they are attention whores.
I would have did the same thing you did, if I had to hear that for almost 4 months straight.
======================================
Good gravy! My grandmother was mixed on both sides, some Native American, some Black, some White. On the census they were classified as mulattos. They owned their farm outright, hired some neighbors to work and were about as successful as you could be during the depression. The rest of the community was White. When it was time for my mother to start school, she had to go to the Colored school, except there was no Colored school in the area. Her parents had to send her away, pay room and board, where she lived with strangers until the end of the term. She was heartbroken that she couldn't go to school with her best friend on the neighboring farm.....
Submitted by oh dave on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 8:28pm.
I don't believe it unless Tina thought it was MICHAEL Jackson's girlfriend. But if it's true who was the girlfriend?
Answer: Aaron Carter! (in a time machine)
****************
They are waiting for you over in the Aaron Carter thread. ;)
*whistles and walks away*
______________
Hell, everything would be better with stick ponies-MK
Man, I knew Tina shot that fool for a reason! Tina seems like a for real real kinda thug that makes 2Pac, Capone, and Freselli look like muppet extras on Sesame Street! Ain't no accidents when Tine-mothafuckin-Turner gotta gun. As I said earlier: Keep cappin' those bitches, Miss Tina!
I don't believe it unless Tina thought it was MICHAEL Jackson's girlfriend. But if it's true who was the girlfriend?
Answer: Aaron Carter! (in a time machine)
http://soundcloud.com/burning_plastic
http://twitter.com/#!/burning_plastic
Submitted by boredasfuckyo on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:59pm.
Submitted by urmomma on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:31pm.
________________________________
Technically you're a half-breed, then.
*****************
lmao. yes, I am a white indian, but I have the cheek bones and good hair. tyvfm.
I must admit I am a bit confused as to where all the anti-native American shit is coming from, but maybe I am not reading the posts with the right head tilt. I am proud of my heritage, but won't be asking anyone to write a term paper on the plight of the American Indians any time soon. :)
*hums...I'm your private dancer. A dancer for money and ol' music will do.*
______________
Hell, everything would be better with stick ponies-MK
What do you expect?
Randy's a Jackson, ergo, a fucked up piece of shit.
and yeah, like I'd believe she shot you without a very good reason. asshole.
------------------------------------------------
What a friend I have in jesus, I can say that
honestly. He's not like all my other friends who really don't care about me.
Submitted by Nicholeoleoleo on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 4:37pm.
Submitted by boredasfuckyo on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:59pm.
Submitted by urmomma on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:31pm.
________________________________
Technically you're a half-breed, then. I can say that because I'm almost native american, and have irish origins,as well as hispanic, so hooray! .Everyone here is so native pride though, and I am so over native american bullshit, powwows and dream catchers. The people who go to them are always more white than anything. My english professor was apparently part native american, but looked more white than anything and everything she assigned us to read and write our papers on was native american related. The first time I read Sherman Alexie, I was just over it. The only thing that didn't revolve around anything native american in that class was Their eyes were watching God, By ZNH and exerpts from the Confederate Papers.
__________________________________
Bored, at least your professor was of native ancestry. My English teacher from high school tried to pull that shit, and he himself couldn't even pass a one drop rule (He was a mix of Norwegian, Irish, and half-German). He spoke about the struggle as if he lived it rather than read it in a book.
It was bad enough that I was the only black girl in the honors class, but to have to hear him go on and on for 5 months straight was too much. I called him out for it, and he turned around and said that I just didn't understand the plight of the Native American people. I shut him the fuck up after I explained to him that my grandmother and great-grandmother were natives.
Sure I walked away with a D- for the first half of the year, but at least I got to lay some cold hard facts on that motherfucker and he couldn't say shit to the contrary.
__________________________________
Lmao! I hate posers. And I hate people who talk about stuff like, the white man stole this,this and this from my people, it's like fool, the WHITE MAN ARE YOUR PEOPLE!
It's ridiculous, reminds me of Kurt Metzger's 1/8th native american skit. Where he was like you gotta alotta nerve braggin that you're one 1/8th cherokee.Braggin like, if we're ever lost in a forest somewhere, his 1/8th native powers will activate and he'll beast master us to safety. You know where that 1/8th Cherokee is? your white genetics moved your 1/8th native american on a reservation on your ball hair, the worst part of your body...Lmao!
My grandfather had to go to an all Native American school, because he wasn't allowed to go to school with white students, and where we live(mostly surrounded by bayous at the time) he had toget there by boat. I remember his cousin, telling me growing up it gave her a complex, making her feel like she wasn't good enough, to go to school with everyone else, and made her wonder why. They actually lived it. I think people who live it, are LESS whiney than the people who didn't, but only do it to get sympathy and guilt for something they didn't have to go through because they are attention whores.
I would have did the same thing you did, if I had to hear that for almost 4 months straight.
__________________________________
Please get the fuck out ---->
Submitted by Karen Flatts on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 7:29pm.
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 1:29pm.
Hey, if you are gonna be shot, Tina Tuner
**********************************************
I fucking LOVE this typo. I laughed for about 10 minutes at "Tina Tuner". Guess she tuned his ass up for real.
*********************
Hahaha! My "R" on my computer isn't working that well lately, so I have had many typos that have amused folks!
Yeah, she is a Tuner for sure!
She only shot him the once?
No commitment.
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 1:29pm.
Hey, if you are gonna be shot, Tina Tuner
**********************************************
I fucking LOVE this typo. I laughed for about 10 minutes at "Tina Tuner". Guess she tuned his ass up for real.
Submitted by snowpiece on Wed, 07/08/2009 - 5:00pm.
Karen Flatts is always a cunt
@Nicholeoleoleo: good for you!
TEAM COLD HARD FACTS ON THE MOTHERFUCKER
Love it! Tina is NOT THE ONE!
**********
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z_u7VGiMO0U
Submitted by PTCruiser on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 4:46pm.
here's the scoop from Tina's assistant at the time:
OhNoTheyDidnt
seems diva missed on purpose.
The girlfriend was seeking refuge at Tina's house from abuse-monger Randy.
Randy showed up at Tina's house, threw a lamp through the window shattering it to get access into the house. Everyone else was petrified with fear. Tina went and got her gun. Threw off a warning shot into the ceiling. When Randy came at em undeterred, she aimed for one of his non-essential body part.
Love her.
How gross is Randy to intimate that Tina would phreak out cuz she was caught in flagrante delicto. As if. :: eyeroll ::
-----------------
Well I like this version of the story better, and how convenient that he left out the fact that he was ABUSIVE to his girlfriend and broke into Tina's house in a rage! I am surprised Tina didn't consider his head a 'non-essential body part' under those circumstances.
NEXT TIME, RANDY, TINA WILL SHOOT TO KILL AND SHE IS LOADING HER GUN RIGHT NOW
I LOVE this: "Everyone else was petrified with fear. Tina went and got her gun." DAMN RIGHT SHE DID.
Submitted by PTCruiser on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 4:46pm.
PT Cruiser THANK YOU!! OMG, I love Tina even more now. You feckin GO girl. TINA IS NOT THE ONE!!
How you gonna sneak up on a bitch when she rollin down the river? Duck down muthafucka!
Randy should have kept this in the vault. Fame whore.
__________________
'Those of you lucky enough to have your lives, take them with you. However, leave the limbs you've lost. They belong to me now'-BK
@ arlene.....This quite possibly is the funniest comment ever.
@ putas
Hahaha the visual image alone was enough inspiration
glad you lol
___________________
'Those of you lucky enough to have your lives, take them with you. However, leave the limbs you've lost. They belong to me now'-BK
Not sure I like Jackson pulling a Donna Karan pose. Escandalo for real. Tina too. Christ.
________
"...How I feel?...Your heart rate is jacked; your hand, steady...I haven't slept for fucking weeks...and you're going to, what, you're going to close my file?!...You're fucking ridiculous." -Billy Costigan, The Departed
Tina said it best:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YqWkFF-TbMU
**************************************************
www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
Submitted by CORNDOG on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:04pm.
first nations usually have great teefs..
-----------------------------------------------
Hmmm, unforch, a lot (NOT ALL) of the first nations people where I live either don't have access to good dental care, and/or have been given bottles of juice or pop to fall asleep with when babies, so the teef sich is a bit messed up...
ALSO, I love you Dad, but if you want to come over CALL FIRST!!!
"my brows could subtract that WTF look on your face so move along"
Randy is a little bitch cry baby who needs to shut his mouth before Miss Tina comes back to finish the job. No one fucks with an empowered woman packing heat, especially one with years of pent-up hostility. He had it coming.
I like how he says "I don't hold a grudge against Tina..."
Um, neither do I, FOOL!
He's lucky she didn't shoot him in the head for breaking into her house like that.
I still say Miss Tina shot him because she wanted her blouse back.
Submitted by joanne on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:50pm.
I hope her aim improved.
__________________________
here's the scoop from Tina's assistant at the time:
OhNoTheyDidnt
seems diva missed on purpose.
The girlfriend was seeking refuge at Tina's house from abuse-monger Randy.
Randy showed up at Tina's house, threw a lamp through the window shattering it to get access into the house. Everyone else was petrified with fear. Tina went and got her gun. Threw off a warning shot into the ceiling. When Randy came at em undeterred, she aimed for one of his non-essential body part.
Love her.
How gross is Randy to intimate that Tina would phreak out cuz she was caught in flagrante delicto. As if. :: eyeroll ::
Submitted by boredasfuckyo on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:59pm.
Submitted by urmomma on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:31pm.
________________________________
Technically you're a half-breed, then. I can say that because I'm almost native american, and have irish origins,as well as hispanic, so hooray! .Everyone here is so native pride though, and I am so over native american bullshit, powwows and dream catchers. The people who go to them are always more white than anything. My english professor was apparently part native american, but looked more white than anything and everything she assigned us to read and write our papers on was native american related. The first time I read Sherman Alexie, I was just over it. The only thing that didn't revolve around anything native american in that class was Their eyes were watching God, By ZNH and exerpts from the Confederate Papers.
__________________________________
Bored, at least your professor was of native ancestry. My English teacher from high school tried to pull that shit, and he himself couldn't even pass a one drop rule (He was a mix of Norwegian, Irish, and half-German). He spoke about the struggle as if he lived it rather than read it in a book.
It was bad enough that I was the only black girl in the honors class, but to have to hear him go on and on for 5 months straight was too much. I called him out for it, and he turned around and said that I just didn't understand the plight of the Native American people. I shut him the fuck up after I explained to him that my grandmother and great-grandmother were natives.
Sure I walked away with a D- for the first half of the year, but at least I got to lay some cold hard facts on that motherfucker and he couldn't say shit to the contrary.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"'Those who danced were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.' We hear the music and we still think you're insane, bitch. For the record." [Michael K on Megan Fox]
Tina during her Mad Max phase.
http://www.nextmovie.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/mad-max-tina-turner-...
Yeah, don't sneak up on that, foolish Jackson.
Submitted by urmomma on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:31pm.
________________________________
Technically you're a half-breed, then. I can say that because I'm almost native american, and have irish origins,as well as hispanic, so hooray! .Everyone here is so native pride though, and I am so over native american bullshit, powwows and dream catchers. The people who go to them are always more white than anything. My english professor was apparently part native american, but looked more white than anything and everything she assigned us to read and write our papers on was native american related. The first time I read Sherman Alexie, I was just over it. The only thing that didn't revolve around anything native american in that class was Their eyes were watching God, By ZNH and exerpts from the Confederate Papers.
__________________________________
Please get the fuck out ---->
thanks for the little refreshing...Eddie Izzard/
Gotta be thankful for the straight white teefs..:)
I hope her aim improved.
Submitted by joe shmoe on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 2:52pm.
**************
Oh.that.was.pretty. Thanks for the link!
and
I know that my back to back posts are obnoxious, but if it makes you feel better I am off to annoy my family instead.
:)
______________
Hell, everything would be better with stick ponies-MK
A scar doesn't prove shit, especially when YOUR FATHER IS JOE JACKSON!
__________________________________
Please get the fuck out ---->
Submitted by mike on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 1:13pm.
That's why you always call before visiting someone, people. It's common decency.
_____________________________________
Exactly, especially where I live.
Submitted by Sweetas on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 1:19pm.
She probably shot him because he's Randy Jackson. Good call, gf.
________________________________
LMAO!
__________________________________
Please get the fuck out ---->
FMR...sorry, sweetas. My fingers were soooo excited!
*calms down*
______________
Hell, everything would be better with stick ponies-MK
STFU. And you, Randy Jackson, are a total liability to that industry.
El B ans sweeats
*hearts y'all until my I wet my pants*
Yes, I am 1/2 Cherokee and half irish...So that makes me the dranken'est, cussin'est, and prideful'est okie evah. tyvm.
El b this is for you, love!
http://youtu.be/9gE7r1CknQs
p.s. it's eddie izzard so everyone should enjoy!
and corndog, mah teefs are straight and white...most days.
______________
Hell, everything would be better with stick ponies-MK
Too bad she missed.
I wonder if they got caught doing drugs or "the nasty"?