Look Who Graced Prince Albert's Wedding With His Kunty Presence
In front of the likes of Naomi Campbell, Princess Stephanie, Victoria Silvstedt and Kunty Karl, Prince Albert of Monaco married Charlene Wittstock in a religious ceremony yesterday afternoon. The rumor that Kunty Karl will turn into small pile of crushed bright white dead nightmares if he even makes half of a sashay into a church is obviously just that, because he was able to sit through the entire ceremony without God's angel army dragging him away.
The royal family obviously brought in the sexiest member of the Death Eaters to make sure that Charlene's ass didn't head for LE EXIT. There was talk that Charlene's passport was snatched away when she tried to pull some runaway bride shit by flying back to South Africa after she found out that Prince Albert has take a paternity test, because there's a good chance the bald man slut of Europe made a third love child with some Italian chick. Every time Charlene's eyes cut to the exit, Kunty Karl threatened to chew on her soul by making a sucking sound with his teeth. I guess Charlene figured that selling her soul to Monaco was better than her soul getting trapped around one of Kunty Karl's crushed bone hair follicles, because she actually married Prince Albert!
You wouldn't be lying if you said that Charlene looks like she would rather be marrying the OTHER Prince Albert. You know, the one who's a soft pierced dick. Instead of hearing the wedding march, you know Charlene heard the sounds of prisoners running tin cups along prison bars. Not since Stepford Katie....
Well, if you're going to put in shackles, it might as well be made of diamonds and shit.
• 
KUNTY KARL NEEDS TO HEM HIS PANTS!! STAT!
LE EXIT....lolololol. Mk you are a funny motherfucker.
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“She was not quite what you would call refined. She was not quite what you would call unrefined. She was the kind of person that keeps a parrot.”
Mark Twain
Poor Charlene. Kids made before you get together with someone, no problem but after....shit. She had to know he was a shit after knowing him for so long but maybe she (like so many) deluded herself into thinking she could change him, he'd be different with her, he had changed, or ???? It sucks to be in an unhappy marriage. Can't imagine what it would be like just being someone's official incubator. :(
Forgot about Caroline losing her hair. She looks sad and I feel for her in a way. She's made her own bad choices though. Dumping drunk Ernst would be a good first step towards being happier, imo.
Stephanie was never great looking....Caroline was pretty but you could definitely see their father in both. Albert probably looks the least like Prince Rainier.
Caroline looks fine- good in fact for someone who is 54.
Stephanie, on the other hand, looks terrible. Too much smoking/sun/drinking/effing bodyguards, and it all shows on her face.
Albert is a fat, bald ass, who if he wasn't so rich, would never ever get laid. Apparantly there are possibly 2 new illegitimate children, all this came out just as the wedding was taking place, and one of these kiddies is 18 months old. Charlene and Albert have been together for 5 years so you do the math!
Submitted by BabyJane on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 7:24pm.
Damn! Caroline and Stephanie use to be the two hottest women on the planet! What the FUCK happened to them. It's not like they ever had to work 12 hours a day and worry about choosing food or medicine. They have had a life of doing NOTHING. There's some shit going on in Monaco.
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Well Caroline had a lot of tragedy in her life with the deaths of her mother and husband. Then there was her hooking up with the German prince which was a scandal because he was married. Then all her hair fell out. Her latest husband has been cheating on her recently. Stephanie drinks and smokes plus has had to live with the accusation that she was driving the car when it went off the cliff, killing Grace.
Supposedly the Grimaldis are cursed so maybe that explains it.
Looking at his outfit I am feeling all kinds of hot. It's 116 degrees WITH humidity here in Arizona at the moment and looking at this outfit makes me want to flee!
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Submitted by Spacey on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 3:47am.
Night, Spacey!
So tired%D%A%D%Anight Beckster%D%A%D%A
Submitted by Spacey on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 3:31am.
It's 7.30p.m. Monday night.
How can you manage to stay up so late?
My sleep patterns are terrible but I never actually get out of bed. Just stare at the clock/radio for hours.
becky n sydney on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 3:21am.
I'm a worry wart. I admit it. lol
Sowwy...I iz a spazz.
Thank you for your reassurance because I would have been lighting candles, praying, lighting my hair on fire and pissing in a circle doing v00j00 for you if I didn't hear back from you.
What time are you? It's 2:21 my time. I'm up way too late for my own good.
Submitted by Spacey on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 3:14am.
Haha! You're so cute when you panic!
As I said, that was last night, today not so much.
I'm feeling much better now (could just be the tabs) so I'm hoping it was a 48 hour thing.
If the sinus pain comes back tonight, I promise I'll visit the docs tomorrow. :)
becky n sydney on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 3:07am.
UGH! You have a definite sinus infection. You better get your sweet arse to the doctor and get on some antibiotics. As much as I hate traditional medicine, I know when I 'need' it.
Please, get to a DOC when you can. Some infections can go systemic and affect your entire blood-stream and become toxic to the point of damaging your internal organs.
PLEASE, get thee to the physician! Promise me?
well, folks... i guess that i'm gonna see a bed about a pillow situation... it's a pressing argument that i have constantly!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6a0gU_klr2M
night/morning, all!!
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 3:02am.
to me he's gonna have to stick with "Prince Who?"... it's the only title i could give him without cursing!
Yaknow? You barely ever curse. I just NOW noticed that?
I swear like a trucker when I'm being overtly expressive but it's because I'm married to a carpenter (same difference ad/more).
'Cussing' is my way to show that I'm low class, crass, rude and lude and lovin' it. ;p
Submitted by Spacey on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 2:53am.
It started with my son last week and has spread to the rest of us. The sinus pain is the worst part. I couldn't sleep last night - it felt like my cheekbones were going to explode. :(
I don't have any capers, just Vitamin C and Echinacea tabs. Plus the usual cold & flu tabs for the snotty symptoms. I'm hoping to avoid antibiotics.
*makes honey and lemon drink*
Submitted by from athens on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 2:55am.
to me he will always be Prince Tooms,scary shit must be going on in Monaco
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to me he's gonna have to stick with "Prince Who?"... it's the only title i could give him without cursing!
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 2:47am.
douche bag brand kitty litter?!?!.... HAHAHA!!... now, that's a world on the brink of well deserved big bang detonation!LOL!
Total idiocracy writ large! lol "Press one for number POO".
to me he will always be Prince Tooms,scary shit must be going on in Monaco
Beckster, you is teh sickz?
NOOOOOOOO.
Do you have any capers in your fridge? Capers are naturally highest in Quercetin which is a powerful anti-inflammatory/antioxidant. I'm also just learning that capers are great for fighting allergy symptoms!
My immune system must be high octane because my daughter was super contagious with bronchitis (she gave it to everyone she lives with) and I didn't catch it during her many visits and hugs with me.
L-Lysine is also a super immune booster.
I hope you feel better soon. :(
What are you guys talking about? Caroline looks exactly like a 50 something woman is supposed to look. At least she's not botoxed and pulled twenty ways to the backs of her ears.
douche bag brand kitty litter?!?!.... HAHAHA!!... now, that's a world on the brink of well deserved big bang detonation!LOL!
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 2:29am.
LOL!
Somebody SERIOUSLY needs to 'brand' the name "Douche-Bag"! I'm telling ya, the younger set would totally love it. Douche-bag t-shirts, douche-bag hats, douche-bag hockey sticks, douche-bag douche-bags, douche-bag tampons, douche-bag kevlar armor, douche-bag skates, douche-bag shoes, douche-bag dance-gear, douche-bag kitty litter, douche-bag workout-machines, douche-bag party favors, douche-bag NASA space shuttle, douche-bag peas and carrots, douche-bag carpet that doesn't match the douche-bag drapes... etc. ad infinitum +++
I'm so FOR a new 'DOUCHE-BAG' president even...
Oh...wait...
Submitted by becky n sydney on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 2:36am.
i hope you feel better... we can't have a doped up, flu ridden becky running around here... well, not a flu ridden one, at least!... heehee!
-----------------------------
"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 2:24am.
I have a touch of flu at the moment. :(
Overly self-medicating is pleasant. :)
Submitted by Spacey on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 2:24am.
oh! he's another one that does perfumes?... i get it... he's "outside the box", and "unique"... ya know... a prick!LOL!
-----------------------------
"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
Submitted by becky n sydney on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 2:20am.
They're not gloves - Kunty Karl really has grey, warty hands with pink fingertips. :)
How are you this evening? All well in the ESE world?
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is that it?... well, he does look a bunch leathery, so... it could explain it!
i'm kinda "meh" tonight/morning, becks... you doin' o.k.?
-----------------------------
"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 2:14am.
He's 'branded' himself from everything to fashion to perfume. The Lagerfield name is pretty much a brand like "Chanel" or "Douche-Bag". etc. Personally, I like "Douche-bag" purses...very ROOMY.
I'm guessing his 'fingerless gloves' are his way of reaching out to homeless people [NOT]. His weird wardrobe that is a throwback to a time when gays would have been hung is a nice touch. *cough-cough*
Submitted by sonne on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 2:18am.
if he thinks it's cool, he's about 25 years late, right?... i keep waiting to see pictures of him break dancing!LOL!
-----------------------------
"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 2:14am.
They're not gloves - Kunty Karl really has grey, warty hands with pink fingertips. :)
How are you this evening? All well in the ESE world?
LOL, ESE I was wondering that, too. It occurred to me he might be trying to cover up his real age since you know your hands always give you away. ;) Or he's greatly deluded himself, thinking it's cool. :P
Submitted by Naughychimp on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 1:32am.
I would agree with you there about the seriously kinky shit. They can get away with anything basically. An example: the swedish king is in the middle of stripper sex scandals. Some mob guy claims to have pics of him, naked in a hot tub with guy friends and strippers (this is tame compared to others, I know). He also speeds in his fancy car, which is dangerous to others. I think if he killed someone, there wouldn't be any real consequences like for us but I could be wrong. The husband of the danish queen is rumored to be bi/gay. Their sons speed in their cars but don't get tickets because they're royals.
These are minor compared to what I imagine Albert has gotten up to but if you grow up able to get away with stuff, people bring it to you and your parents don't raise you right, you're going to probably turn into a degenerate asshole who marries a pretty girl just to get an heir. Makes me grateful to be a "peasant" lol.
i know this will probably never get answered, but i have to lay out the question anyway... i know pretty much nothing about this guy, except that he's a world class asshole, but... why does he always seem to be wearing the fingerless gloves?... it's a "fashion" thing, right?
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
Prince Albert definitely sleeps with men. Not sure if he prefers them but he's at very least bisexual (& nailed a friend's gay, French uncle in the 80s). I think these royal guys get so much sex of all kinds thrown at them from when they hit puberty, onwards, that they all must be into some seriously kinky shit, no matter their sexual orientation.
I bet that Stephanie is the only royal with visible tats. She really loves them bodyguards.
Charlene, you fool! You coulda been with some hot European gold medalist swimmer, with a lean, muscular body...
Submitted by liverwurst on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 5:32pm.
I KNOW RIGHT!!! kunty karl has no bulge whatsoever. not even testicle-toe (male version of cameltoe).
which tells me that karl's fuck parts stopped working since the 18th century and these attractive side pieces he has with him, they hold and change his colostomy bag, and change his diaper cuz he has anal leakage, since he cant eat solid food and can only eat baby mushy food.
Thank you catholicschoolgirl!
Submitted by joe shmoe on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 7:17pm.
*sending lovely card, chocolates, and roses to Queensland*
- - - -
WASHINGTON—According to a report published this week by the U.S. Department of Education, an increasing number of universities now offer dick-around abroad programs that give students the chance to hang out and do jack shit in another country
Damn! Caroline and Stephanie use to be the two hottest women on the planet! What the FUCK happened to them. It's not like they ever had to work 12 hours a day and worry about choosing food or medicine. They have had a life of doing NOTHING. There's some shit going on in Monaco.
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I've written a letter to MK...saying...I...love...youuuuuu.
Submitted by RustyHooligan on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:33pm.
Submitted by joe shmoe on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:27pm.
Okaaaay: here you go, never mind my nips now. They were on high alert cuz of the danger I placed myself in, to have this pic taken.
Photoshopped! (Was Hitler an elephant trainer?)
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No trainer needed, my friend. My natural magnetism tamed that mighty beast.
That and my ferocious nips. :D
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Submitted by TexnDoc on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 6:45pm.
More great pictures are here:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2010687/Monaco-royal-wedding-Is-...
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Pierre (Caroline's son) is a dead ringer for his dad. Spitting image of him.
Her dress is stunning.
Is Kunty scared his socks might escape?
Well, let's see how long this love match lasts. I'd give him an heir & a spare & then head to divorce court for my settlement. Or I'd stay around & live the life of luxury while PA screwed around with his BF. He may have 3 illie kids but that don't stop the rumors. And then there's that 13th century curse that none of the Grimaldis will ever be happy in marriage.
More great pictures are here:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2010687/Monaco-royal-wedding-Is-...
Yummy: Princess Caroline's kids (the daughter has the requisite royal smirk) and the bride's brothers and the cake.
Princess Caroline and Stephanie look like Blanche and Jane Hudson (no offense to the DListed version)
Where are the pictures of Princess Caroline's extremely good looking children?
Have to admit they put the Windsors to shame in the looks department. Pictures please?
That man needs more fucking bling on his damn self. Not even a king should outshine the bride on her wedding day. I wonder how she feels about his illegitimate chillen(s)???? Hey, has January Jones been in Monaco? Maybe PA knocked her up.
She is pretty, if bland looking, a clone of mommy. The dresses are classy.
Princess Stephanie was the firecracker of that bunch.
~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~
I never should have switched from Scotch to Martinis. - Bogart
Peterson is on death row and Van der Sloot hasn't been to trial yet, but he's at least admitted to killing the girl from last year.
Casey is a sociopath. I honestly don't think I've ever seen anyone who has done such awful shit and doesn't show a lick of emotion for what she's done. I don't even know the guy and I was bawling as I watched George on the stand last week breaking the fuck down over losing his granddaughter.
A part of me wants to hug the dad (mom can bite my snatch) for standing by his daughter even after the accusations she's allowing her lawyer to throw at him and another part of me wants to smack him for being an enabler to the horrible she's she's said and done to him through this trial.
I do not get anyone who has ANY sympathy at all for Casey. She is a wicked, horrible murderess, who killed a child! Anyone who thinks that her father had anything to do with the death and/or cover up is a moron. That man loved that baby, and had grieved more than anyone over this whole mess.
I love Baez blaming him by saying that she is a product of her environment. Yeah, yeah, when in doubt, blame the parents for raising her, because it couldn't possibly be that she is a sick, twisted, cunt on he own. Someone has to be blamed for it. Shame on her also, for bringing molestation into this. She uses an excuse like that for her actions, knowing full well that she was never touched by her father or brother. If that were the case, why would she continue to be around those people if they were that morally corrupt and abusive?! Would she want her daughter molested too, if her daddy and brother were child toucher/rapists? She is despicable and the death penalty by lethal is far too good for her.
Submitted by The Machine on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 5:57pm.
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Sun, 07/03/2011 - 3:54pm.
Yup. I think she had a fight with her mom (Cindy) the last day she blew out of that house, with Caylee. Caylee was probably crying up a storm asking for grandma. Casey, the spitefull cunttrash that she is, took shit out on Caylee and was like "sleep with this" mess. That is why cuntrash ho plays the unfeeling card - bitch REALLY thinks she's not at fault - like all narcissists. All of them. She deserves all four counts of law obstruction and at least one count of felony child neglect. AT LEAST. Hate that cold bitch. She's just like Van der Sloot and that Peterson fker. They'll get out and pull the same shit within 4 years. *punches monitor*
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"...How I feel?...Your heart rate is jacked; your hand, steady...I haven't slept for fucking weeks...and you're going to, what, you're going to close my file?!...You're fucking ridiculous." -Billy Costigan, The Departed