Hot Slut Of The Day!

June 24, 2011 / Posted by:

L.A. Lakers forward Ron Artest, or as you’ll soon have to address him as: Metta World Peace.

I guess born names in the sports world are a non-motherfuckin’ factor (Copyright: Evelyn from Basketball Wives. No, seriously, if I didn’t mention that she’d probably drag me to small claims court.)!

A few years ago, NFL player Chad Johnson planted the seed of crazy when he changed his name to something that sounded like a bootleg Mexican gas station that uses the same logo and font as 76. And now the name change fuckery has spread to the NBA. Ron Artest filed papers to officially and legally change his name to Metta World Peace. This is strangely close to what I was going to officially and legally change my name to: Betta Work Puta!

Ron’s rep, who quit that bitch last week, confirms this mess to the L.A. Times. A spokesperson for the L.A. Lakers says that “Metta” will be his first name and “World Peace” will be his last. The spokesperson doesn’t know if Metta plans to file paperwork with the NBA to change the name on the back of his jersey. You know that crazy bitch will.

Oh, Ron. Was “I Neva Metta Psychiatrist” or “I Neva Metta An Ounce Of Sanity” already taken? Metta World Peace just doesn’t skip off your tongue like more appropriate names for Ron. You know, like “Mega Watt Douchebag” or “Messy Warped Pussy.” But maybe Mr. World Peace is on to something. Most of the entire Internet is sitting in front of their computers kicking at his new name when they could be kicking at puppies and shooting up kittens in the street. We’re channeling all our rage into hating on his new name instead. So yeah, maybe Mr. World Peace really is bringing us closer to world peace one name change at a time.

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